Author Burger Chef Posted January 5, 2017 Author Share Posted January 5, 2017 Yes but what changes will there be in his life if you divorce? OK, he may not like you fighting and hating each other but he won't be too happy if you leaving results in him moving to an apartment with little money, a change of school and far away from his friends. AND he will see up close how much you have hurt his mother too All, whilst at the same time you are enjoying yourself with your new "fling". The woman who ruined and broke up his family. The woman who may resent every penny you want to spend on your son. The woman he may always hate. Happy days! I know I am painting a black picture, but it is not an unrealistic one. Have you thought out how this affair, the divorce and the aftermath will really affect your son and your relationship with him? My child will remain in the same school until graduation. My AP lives in another state and will not be moving into my next place of residence, I wish she could. Yes I've thought about the consequences of divorce.....over and over and over again. My marriage has been ice cold for way too long. I can't pretend and play happily married family man anymore. I'm done with the acting. With my job I was off NYE. Once I found out my son wasn't going to be home I picked up work to make sure I was out of town. I couldn't bear the idea of being home with just her. I know what it looks like, her in the bedroom with her kids(dogs) on the bed and me in the living room. No thanks. Again thank you all for your comments 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Author Burger Chef Posted January 5, 2017 Author Share Posted January 5, 2017 Uh, you did an entire post on how he should think looong and hard about leaving his miserable marriage before doing so because he has a child. Sorry, I don't think you waste your life suffering for the child, it sets a bad example and doesn't teach them anything. But, I don't believe in the affair bubble either. Thank you for your comments. It's good to get all sides of the issue. I appreciate it Link to post Share on other sites
Author Burger Chef Posted August 6, 2017 Author Share Posted August 6, 2017 Just wanted to update my situation. Divorce was filed over 6 months ago. I'm still seeing the same person and I love her more than ever. I look forward to completing the divorce by the end of the year. 6 Link to post Share on other sites
Birdies Posted August 6, 2017 Share Posted August 6, 2017 Just wanted to update my situation. Divorce was filed over 6 months ago. I'm still seeing the same person and I love her more than ever. I look forward to completing the divorce by the end of the year. I'm glad for you. This is my situation too, but with both divorces well in the past now. Is your divorce acrimonious? I hope not. Mine was relatively peaceful considering how much I hurt my exH, and my partner's divorce was terrible - his ex went scorched earth including false allegations of physical abuse, etc. A bad divorce and the acrimony you feel for each other at the time can mask your pain of hurting someone you care for deeply and the feelings of grief and loss that are inherent in losing a significant life partner. So be prepared for that hitting later, if this is your situation. Link to post Share on other sites
lostgirl87 Posted August 6, 2017 Share Posted August 6, 2017 Just wanted to update my situation. Divorce was filed over 6 months ago. I'm still seeing the same person and I love her more than ever. I look forward to completing the divorce by the end of the year. So great for you!! How's your son doing? Link to post Share on other sites
freengreen Posted August 8, 2017 Share Posted August 8, 2017 You were in a loveless marriage for too long. You only filing now because you have this women to hold. But atleast you are ready to let go your W. Your son is now old enough to understand divorce and cheating, it will be a lot for him but since you are in a hopeless marriage you perhaps will restore peace getting a divorce, but you will still have to deal with explaining him the cheating thou. Goodluck. Link to post Share on other sites
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