Lilyana76 Posted January 17, 2017 Share Posted January 17, 2017 Divorce will be a red flag to some and social proof to others. T\. I don't find this to be the case at all, I would say most of the men I've talked to or met up with on OLD sites have been divorced. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Jj66 Posted January 17, 2017 Share Posted January 17, 2017 Having two divorces seem to be a little bit of a stigma, still. People often downplay that. At this age you expect people to be divorced. The main question is whether they have kids, how old, and how many. Child custody schedules have a big effect on dating too. You need to find someone with a compatible schedule. Link to post Share on other sites
Lilyana76 Posted January 17, 2017 Share Posted January 17, 2017 I will say, being more mature, I find dating somewhat easier in the respect that I tolerate way less bullsh*t. If someone is giving me bad vibes or rubbing me the wrong way, I tell them and am out sooner than I would have been in my earlier years. Having more experience and knowing exactly what you want, makes dating somewhat easier. Finding a decent date is the real challenge. Link to post Share on other sites
Mrlonelyone Posted January 17, 2017 Share Posted January 17, 2017 (edited) I don't find this to be the case at all, I would say most of the men I've talked to or met up with on OLD sites have been divorced. I know that's why I said it would be social proof to others. Social proof that someone, somewhere, at some point, thought she was good enough to marry. There are a great many people who need that stamp of other peoples approval before they will go forward. I will say, being more mature, I find dating somewhat easier in the respect that I tolerate way less bullsh*t. If someone is giving me bad vibes or rubbing me the wrong way, I tell them and am out sooner than I would have been in my earlier years. Having more experience and knowing exactly what you want, makes dating somewhat easier. Finding a decent date is the real challenge. I second this emotion OP. Being the age you are, close to the age I am, you will know yourself and what you really NEED in a relationship a lot better. Dating other people close to our age ranges 40 +/-10 years or so everyone knows what they want and who they are. Personally I keep that hope alive for me is knowing that someone my own age will if they like me not BS around as much as younger folks. Edited January 17, 2017 by Mrlonelyone Edited to agree with Lilyana 1 Link to post Share on other sites
thefooloftheyear Posted January 17, 2017 Share Posted January 17, 2017 Having two divorces seem to be a little bit of a stigma, still. People often downplay that. At this age you expect people to be divorced. The main question is whether they have kids, how old, and how many. Child custody schedules have a big effect on dating too. You need to find someone with a compatible schedule. Id think someone who's never been married, no kids, no divorces and is over 40 may raise more eyebrows than someone who's "walked the walk" ,,,,so to speak... TFY Link to post Share on other sites
maryquitecontrary Posted January 18, 2017 Share Posted January 18, 2017 I'm starting over again in my late 30's. I've had one serious boyfriend and lots of flings in the last two and a half years. The good news is that if you just want to dabble in dating and find some men to share company with dating apps are great. I've met some really cool men on tinder. I've dated a pro athlete and an American Idol contestant musician and a French international Attorney-- there's a wide variety of men on tinder. However, almost every single one of them was on tinder "just to have fun" if you know what I mean. I couldn't take any of them seriously and began to just feel used so I stopped looking on dating apps. What I really want is to meet someone in real life so what I do is keep my eyes peeled whenever I'm doing mundane things like going to the grocery store, getting coffee, shopping for light bulbs at a hardware store, etc. I try to go to my friend's get-togethers and outings to try to put myself out there. What I'm finding is that most of the men around my age are married or freshly divorced. The majority of guys I've dated were late 20's, a few in early 20's, and a few late 40's. I feel like 38 is a great age to be because I can select men from a wide range of ages. I'm also finding that a lot of men are complete liars. Don't get me wrong, woman are just as bad, but I actually spent 5 months casually dating someone who gave me a false name, false job, false hometown, and claimed he was single when he was a newlywed. I picked up on the signs, of course, and eventually busted him and left, but it left me with a bitter taste for men. I don't think I'm going to find my next husband on a dating app. It will happen when it's meant to and right now I want to enjoy being single. Take this time to get to really know yourself again. If you get lonely then go on a few dates. Honestly, dating is just a reminder that I don't want to be married again anytime soon. I want to love myself for a while. Oh, and the biggest difference to me between dating 20 years ago and dating now is that men just seem to expect sex on a first date. It blows my mind. Almost every guy I go out with tries to go back to my place after a date. I refuse and don't hear back from them for a second date a lot of times. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Snow7 Posted January 19, 2017 Author Share Posted January 19, 2017 So what would be good OLD sites for casual dating?Not hookups but not searching for marriage either. Link to post Share on other sites
Mrlonelyone Posted January 19, 2017 Share Posted January 19, 2017 So what would be good OLD sites for casual dating?Not hookups but not searching for marriage either. OKC is free and the most flexible. Everyone I know who met their partner via OLD met on OKC. That said, it's been a big bust for me...but then my heart hasn't really been in it. Link to post Share on other sites
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