deecai Posted January 23, 2017 Share Posted January 23, 2017 Hi all, first time poster. My ex-boyfriend and I are in college together and dated for 9 months. I used to be incredibly insecure, and he knew that. I made a huge mistake that involved kissing someone else that he forgave me for. The last 3 months of our relationship were rocky, we tried to regain what we had before the mistake. Things did start looking up towards the end, but he got so tired of sticking his neck out that he ended things. I completely understand and respect his decision but do still love him. We have been broken up now for a little over 5 weeks. I've seen him twice this past week and the first time, we kissed. It was just meant to be a casual dinner and movie but we both agreed it was amazing. We ended up having sex but afterwards, both agreed that we still had feelings that we didn't know were there. Feelings that were beyond physical. The next time, we tried to abstain from being physical but did have sex again. We also spent the night/day together watching tv, getting food/coffee, and talking. Eventually, we tackled the "what are we" topic. It's been a confusing few days, but we settled on from now on, being JUST friends. Abstaining from anything physical but still caring for one another and hanging out. He still loves me and cares for me as a friend, but is not in love with me at the moment. He seems to notice that I am now more secure and confident. We have decided to remain platonic friends for two months, and then see where we are in March. If any feelings have changed, if we should be together now, if we need more time, if we have met other people, etc. I just want to know, do you think I will just get friend-zoned? Do I have a chance with the man I love? Link to post Share on other sites
Glhx Posted February 8, 2017 Share Posted February 8, 2017 (edited) Don't kiss other guys That's where trust and respect dies Do research on all that makes you insecure Learn about it Own it Fix it and become stronger for it. Let it become your strength instead of your weakness As for him You both can't keep your hands off eAchother. Don't make it complicated Tell him you learned your lesson and apologize. Sell it His feelings are still there. Just buried Don't beg, don't be clingy, don't be needy Communicate forever and be solid with the utmost integrity. You don't have to do anything You be strong and upright and he will notice. Men want women who want them Not women who want other men Men love loyalty and want to be respected. It's one of the most important things Fight for he one you love and when you don't love them Find it in yourself why. And fix it Never cheat....never overlap. Be the best you can be. Confident, secure, hungry, and sensitive Seductive and sexy even if you are uncomfortable with it Strength comes from pain, failure and uncomfort. Embrace those and they will make you strong. Feel all of it and don't hide it or hold it in. Succeed My ex left me 2 months ago and left me in the darkest most painful place I've ever been. For another man who sent me nude pictures of her yesterday I wanted the pain. I felt all of it I researched it and understood it And now it's made me stronger Now I deal with it better What she doesn't know is that she will come back when I decide Even though she doesn't want to. BecUse in this dark time I've learned what people want. We all have that control We have to be more powerful and secure than who they left is for or who else hey are attracted to. Hope this helps You are the master of yourself and the things you want Check your insecurity at the door and grow. Time to stop messing around with your life and focus Edited February 8, 2017 by Glhx 1 Link to post Share on other sites
dumbass2 Posted February 8, 2017 Share Posted February 8, 2017 (edited) Yes, if you keep going you will more than likely be in the friend zone and it's almost impossible to come back from that. It sounds like you've kinda got yourself into the FWB situation the last few weeks. It sounds like you two wont be able to cut off the physical part. I think you both need to be truly honest with yourselves. If he's not willing to truly give it 100% and try being back in a committed relationship, then really the best thing is for you to both step away without any contact. See where you're at 6 months or so down the road. Just keeping in touch and try to be platonic friends just will never work right out of a romantic relationship. You can't just turn off certain feelings. Edit: you posted this exact same thing, title and all 2 weeks ago and got plenty of responses. Why copy past and re-post it all over again? Edited February 8, 2017 by dumbass2 Link to post Share on other sites
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