Lost her trust; how can I earn it back?

[brad692]

I'll try to summarize this the best I can....so my girlfriend and I broke up about 3 weeks before Christmas. We were officially together for 13 months (15 months including initial dating). The love of my life. I even was online browsing for rings the week before we broke up. We were dating locally the first 3-4 months, but the entire rest of the relationship was long distance (about 3.5 hour drive away).

 

First I have to give a very quick backstory as to what led to my horrible decision. Back in the summer, I hung out with a close friend of mine from high school (who is a female) and I've mentioned her to my gf before. I was honest with my gf and told her exactly what I was doing, where I was, etc. However, while texting my gf that day she gave me the cold shoulder and was being very short over text. Come to find out she was kind of upset that I was hanging out with another female. She tends to not appreciate that if she hasn't met them herself. She came to her senses the next day and even apologized for how she talked to me that day.

 

Flash forward to December, and that same female friend of mine hit me up to catch up since that last time we hung out and to get a drink. I took her up on that offer. Because of how my gf reacted the last time, I decided to think "short term solution" and lie to her. I told her I was hanging out with a different friend of mine (a male). Of course, she finds out over social media that I lied to her that night. She saw a pic of that male friend of mine tagged in a picture when I had just told her that I was still hanging out with him. Ultimately I had to tell her the truth. I said that I lied and that it's so hard for me now to tell her if I'm hanging out with another female. But I will honestly with all my heart say I have never cheated on her or done anything slightly romantic with another girl during my whole time of dating my gf.

 

So that night naturally, she got extremely pissed and did not want to talk to me the rest of the night. She called me the next night and broke up with me. She said she felt like she didn't have a choice. She mentioned that TRUST is her #1 thing she looks for in a relationship and I clearly broke that with her.

 

We talked a few times since then, and I even flew out to see her a week before Christmas to talk things out. We still exchanged Xmas gifts and her family seemed very happy to see me still. I came back home and just a few days later, she called me and said that us talking when being broken up is killing her inside and that we need to go into no contact for a while and focus on ourselves for a bit. She gave no clear time table.

 

It's now been a month and have not heard a peep from her. She even refuses to like any posts of mine on social media.

 

So I guess my main questions are: do I need to reach out to her now even though she asked for the no contact? I just am going crazy inside. AND when we do talk again what type of things does she need to hear that can get her trust back?

[TheDatingDudes]

Personally, I would reach out to her and just express that you miss her. A simple text, email, or other non-confrontational message that shares your emotions will go a long way in showing her that you genuinely are down. If she replies, take things slowly. Celebrate small wins but keep being sweet with her. Earning trust back is NOT easy.