Abe Posted July 21, 2005 Share Posted July 21, 2005 I know a made a post the other day about an old flame contacting me after a year. The thing is what I really want right now is my current ex...she decided she wanted to "take a break" about 2 weeks ago. We talked and she said she still loves me...that she wants to give it a month to see how she feels. She said that she wants to marry me....however she wants this month to make sure. She told me I should see other people. I suggested to her that we not speak during this time..she denied that and said that we were going to talk. When I talk to her she still tells me she loves me.....hell she even stayed here on 2 occasions (no sex involved). I know that she's seeing other guys...I just have that feeling..I also feel like she's keeping me in the wings incase something with whoever else she is seeing doesn't work out. Should I start no contact? When she calls should I ignore it...when she texts should I not respond to them. I'm just a mess these last weeks....with getting dumped and an old gf trying to make amends to things. Any advice would be great Link to post Share on other sites
Merin Posted July 21, 2005 Share Posted July 21, 2005 I don't think you should allow her to make all the choices here. She is the person who ended the relationship and IMO you should be the one who decides what is okay for you and what isn't.. You told her you felt it best not to talk to one another during this "Break" and she said she still wants to talk and/or come by to see you.. again this IMO isn't a choice she should be the one making.. she ended the relationship so yeah, I think she needs to understand what she is risking here and that is loosing you for real, for good. By allowing her to remain in contact with you and see you she really hasn't lost anything and she really cannot begin to understand what that means... She is seeing other people and has told you to do the same... IMO she told you that you should see other people because honestly she doesn't think you will... I would encourage you to stop making yourself available to her... she either wants a relationship with you or she doesn't... she's talking marraige AND seeing other people... oh hell nah! She can't/won't miss you if you're always there regardless of what she does... and she will never understand what it is to lose something if you keep letting her have it all. Hang in there Link to post Share on other sites
Author Abe Posted July 21, 2005 Author Share Posted July 21, 2005 She denies see other guys...she says when she goes out she goes out with a bunch of girls. I'm not stupid though...I know what happens when groups of girls go out...and i've seen her friends and she is most definetlely the most attractive in the bunch. Even when we were together guys were always talking to her when she was out without me...regardless of what was said. But I am telling here right now that I want to break contact. I can't continue to be her crutch that she knows will always be there. I knew this is what I had to do but I was just reluctant in doing so. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Abe Posted July 21, 2005 Author Share Posted July 21, 2005 Welp I told her. I told her that I didn't want to speak with her anymore...it was her decision to do this. I explained that she's dragging me along and it just isn't right to do to me. She either wants to be with me or not be with me and there is no in between. Link to post Share on other sites
flightymighty Posted November 9, 2005 Share Posted November 9, 2005 Keep it up Abe! Regain some dignity and show her whose boss - women love that. Do not talk to her and if you really love her, show her you can live without her - it drives us women maaaaaad. Trust me. Link to post Share on other sites
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