Yellowtulip Posted January 28, 2017 Share Posted January 28, 2017 (edited) Hi All, As the heading says I am going through immense pain of divorce. I had short marriage. My husband was extremely violent and abusive. I know that this divorce is for right reasons. But still I am feeling this immense pain and feel extremely lonely. To give brief about me, I am shy person and have difficulty making new friends. After going through divorce these two things are hitting me hard. Everyday in the morning I tell to myself I can handle it but by evening I am in more pain than before. One of the worst thing is that my soon to ex husband works in the same office where I work. I try hard not to run into him in cafeteria or break rooms. Whenever I unfortunately see him I always find him laughing and having good time with his colleagues. I am trying hard not these things affect but it affects me. One thought which bothers me is that he was the one who abused me and now he is the one who is unaffected and even through divorce he has everything chilled out for him. During marriage I was in am in pain and through divorce I am still in pain. Even during bad marriage I was still looking out for him. I feel so stupid. His abusive words and actions still bothers me. I try not to think about it but still it keeps cropping in my mind. Life for him is smooth. He is earning more than and he has got luxuries of life. I pray to God to give me strength to deal with all this pain. Even after he spoiled my life why God is not punishing him. I know it sounds very medieval asking God to punish him but I can't help. My pain is so immense. I feel like I am missing out on life because of this crappy person. I feel so lonely and devastated. I know I have to train my mind not feel all these but still it haunts me. Feels like my life is over. My life feels like failure. Please help !!! Edited January 28, 2017 by Yellowtulip Link to post Share on other sites
carhill Posted January 28, 2017 Share Posted January 28, 2017 Welcome to LS Been down the divorce road but without any substantive abuse... 1. Actively seek other employment. No sense in him renting space in your head while trying to earn a buck. 2. One day at a time. Pick one success for the day and pivot on that success. Each day is a new day 3. Seek out therapy for the abuse to learn tools to deal with the memories as well as to process any current manifestations and move forward into new relationships. Don't expect any quick fixes. Direct the work. It takes time. 4. Connect with loved ones and friends. Refocus. Good luck! Link to post Share on other sites
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