MrMan0000075 Posted January 30, 2017 Share Posted January 30, 2017 I am married (in my 40s). She is young (in her 20s) and single...she kissed me on the cheek and then proceeded to kiss my lips, I did resist & shy away from the lip kiss....I did hug and caress her lower back...We have been friends for 4 years now...Never have been sexually intimate..I admire and adore her a lot....Should I mention this to my wife? Was I wrong? I didn't initiate the kiss....I feel I was innocent, overall... Link to post Share on other sites
whichwayisup Posted January 30, 2017 Share Posted January 30, 2017 This is no friend. Friends don't kiss their married friends on the lips like that. Yes you were wrong by touching her back and hugging her. That more or less encourages that behavior to continue. You two are having an emotional affair, (you even call her your EA partner) so you know this is wrong. DO tell your wife. And, end the friendship with this OW. You've been emotionally investing in another woman and while doing that, detaching from your wife. I doubt your wife would approve of this friendship if she knew what happened...Question is, do you have the guts and courage to confess it to her? ARE you willing to end the friendship and focus on your wife before this affair gets more serious and you end up having sex and physically cheating on your wife? 5 Link to post Share on other sites
WilyWill Posted January 30, 2017 Share Posted January 30, 2017 Best thing to do is tell your wife right away so that she can help keep you honest. Then tell your friend that she's only a friend and that she should not be going after married men. Link to post Share on other sites
road Posted January 30, 2017 Share Posted January 30, 2017 Time to end this friendship and go NC with the OW if you want to preserve your marriage and family. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
EveryWomanJ2911 Posted February 2, 2017 Share Posted February 2, 2017 I wonder if your wife spent a lot of time with a long time "friend' half her age and was kissed by him how you would view that? The temptation of flirtation and being noticed by someone who is young and single can be alluring, however its not going to viewed as innocent with the encouragement she received from you. If you are simply looking to remove the blame from yourself, I'm afraid that your wife won't see it that way. And I don't believe that you would view it like that if the situation was reversed. Marriage is a commitment to someone that we will reserve our heart and passion for that person only, and that same person will also reserve themselves for us. Emotionally cheating on your wife with another woman is like her going and physically cheating on you with another man. Its serious and should not be taken lightly or dismissed carelessly. If you care for the twenty something lady, let her find a single and available man to invest her time in who can commit to her on every level. That is the kind thing to do. Then you and your wife can discuss your relationship and maybe see a counselor, pastor, or marriage coach to help you two move forward in a positive way. There are many excellent resources available to married couples facing practically any situation to help them walk through it positively. You might find the following info helpful to you. Things can be good in your marriage again if you remove the relationship parasites from the heart of the marriage, and allow it to be healthy again. You can do this and my prayers are with you friend. ~Blessings and Peace! Is Your Marriage Built on a Solid Foundation? | A Listly List Link to post Share on other sites
aileD Posted February 3, 2017 Share Posted February 3, 2017 Come forward to wife now. You can't continue with the friendship because this woman does not have what's good for you in mind. Let your wife handle it. Link to post Share on other sites
mightycpa Posted February 4, 2017 Share Posted February 4, 2017 Thank you for this post. Link to post Share on other sites
ConInLA Posted February 4, 2017 Share Posted February 4, 2017 End all contact and don't even think about starting anything up with her. I am telling you right now from personal experience that it isn't worth it. Link to post Share on other sites
Ronni_W Posted February 4, 2017 Share Posted February 4, 2017 Should I mention this to my wife? If you feel that this is, in any way, shape or form, a threat to your marriage -- if you think or know that you're not strong (or smart ) enough to withstand this nonsense and just end all ties with this 'friend whom you admire and adore a lot' -- then tell your wife. If you've already ended all ties and are 100% sure that you're done and over it and your marriage is as rock-solid as on your wedding day, then don't tell your wife. Link to post Share on other sites
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