aleks220 Posted January 31, 2017 Share Posted January 31, 2017 Hey friends, A few weeks ago my gf broke up with me because of the fact that I wasnt talkng to her for a week (yeah kinda weird). After that, I tried rekindling things and flirting a little bit which was working until this week where I felt she started backing off (A LOT). Now just so you know, even tho i was the one dumped, I kept chasing her and talked to her for every single day (my initiative) which isnt something im really into, but since it ws working so well I guessed why not. But know i'm getting a taste of my own medecine and she takes far more time to answer my texts in a very cold way and very small messages, so what should I go ? go cold turkey myself and let her reach out ? What if she doesnt and just loses interest ? Thanks for your advices friends ! Link to post Share on other sites
ZayKayWill Posted January 31, 2017 Share Posted January 31, 2017 I would play hard to get and leave her be. Once you show you're not interested chances are she'll start to take an interest in you again. Although that is how you lost her in the first place so...idk. Link to post Share on other sites
Author aleks220 Posted February 1, 2017 Author Share Posted February 1, 2017 Guess I would try that, anyone has other advices and/or behaviors I would go for ? What if she does contact me after playing hard to get, should I maintain the same type of coldness ? Link to post Share on other sites
Sweetfish Posted February 1, 2017 Share Posted February 1, 2017 Guess I would try that, anyone has other advices and/or behaviors I would go for ? What if she does contact me after playing hard to get, should I maintain the same type of coldness ? Your in the process of being dumped again my friend Link to post Share on other sites
benpom Posted February 2, 2017 Share Posted February 2, 2017 go cold turkey myself and let her reach out ? What if she doesnt and just loses interest ? No. Not at all. It will be at most a band-aid. It will create more problems. A good relationship does not involve mind games. Before it's too late, have a heart to heart talk. A relationship based on mutual trust, mutual understanding and mutual caring is far better than a relationship based on mind games. The latter type will either end or worse. Work on myself. One way is ro find a GOOD self development therapist and let him/her find out how you can improve yourself. A good relationship starts with two healthy people. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author aleks220 Posted February 28, 2017 Author Share Posted February 28, 2017 Hi people, I've just broke up with my ex-soon-to-be-gf, let me rephrase. Last week after she was having a real busy schedule from what she and her friends told me, I kinda just reacted to her lack of interest and caller her out on it since it's something that's been bothering me for quite some time... Now the talking was pretty aggressive and I threw a few things with no bad intentions except she took everything personally. Last night after we talked, she told me how much I ****ed up by how bad I talked (when I just shared my feelings), even though I must admit I might have been pushy and needy at some point. She then decided to end the soon-to-be relationship since she told me she wanted to start something with me if I didn't "**** up". Now I've felt a lot of resentment coming from her especially when seeing how immaturely she talked to me and took everything personally when I was just frustrated, so I just told her that what we she should do is just stop where we're at since i'm not interested in being friends or rather, not interested in having anything to do with her, and left it there. Now do you guys think I should just move on and go NC once and for all, and did I really **** up by telling her what I felt, which according to me is kind of a weird reason to break up with someone even if this someone might have implied some things he didn't intend to ? Link to post Share on other sites
SoThatHappened Posted February 28, 2017 Share Posted February 28, 2017 Now the talking was pretty aggressive and I threw a few things You ****ed up. Get help for your sake and for the sakes of women who decide to date you. Link to post Share on other sites
d0nnivain Posted February 28, 2017 Share Posted February 28, 2017 You knew she had a busy schedule -- presumably filled with important things like school or work -- yet you took a harsh tone about what you felt was her failure to prioritize you & the relationship. You are allowed to talk about your feelings in a relationship. If you don't think you are getting enough time & attention you can express that but is you already know the other person is giving you what time they have it might be time to recognize that you two don't fit because your priorities are different. That may make you incompatible. If that is true, breaking up is the best thing. What's done is done here but in your next relationship work on improving your diplomacy. There is a tactful way of addressing a problem & there's throwing gas on the fire. Link to post Share on other sites
Author aleks220 Posted March 21, 2017 Author Share Posted March 21, 2017 Alright here is the story : my gf and i broke up for the ...4th time and i went nc for a while. 2 weeks later we talked and she told me how hard it was on her to at like we don't know each other (same classroom). We then said that we ould try to just be friends which she knows bothers me, but for the sake of our history I just said ok. Now I'm the kind of guy to overreact pretty easily which could help you explain the rest of my feelings as of right now. We talked on the phone for a quite a while a few times during this week, but when it comes to school, she tends to act pretty cold and hot at the same time and when i'm around she is kind of indiferrent to my teases and doesnt really try to talk to me. Am I too needy ? Should i check the way I act ? What do you guys think I should consider doing, as I feel we do have a way to make this work out, thanks! Link to post Share on other sites
jamili Posted March 21, 2017 Share Posted March 21, 2017 Alright here is the story : my gf and i broke up for the ...4th time and i went nc for a while. 2 weeks later we talked and she told me how hard it was on her to at like we don't know each other (same classroom). We then said that we ould try to just be friends which she knows bothers me, but for the sake of our history I just said ok. Now I'm the kind of guy to overreact pretty easily which could help you explain the rest of my feelings as of right now. We talked on the phone for a quite a while a few times during this week, but when it comes to school, she tends to act pretty cold and hot at the same time and when i'm around she is kind of indiferrent to my teases and doesnt really try to talk to me. Am I too needy ? Should i check the way I act ? What do you guys think I should consider doing, as I feel we do have a way to make this work out, thanks! Best way to handle this: cut contact. Do not be her friend if you want her back (which i assume you do since this is in the second chances forum). The friendzone will murder chances for you. Just go back to NC. Ignore her. Ignore her at school. And just move on. Its really the only shot you have now, and what you are currently doing is having the reverse effect. Link to post Share on other sites
Author aleks220 Posted March 21, 2017 Author Share Posted March 21, 2017 Thanks,I do believe thats the best thing to do, what do you other guys think Link to post Share on other sites
Blanco Posted March 21, 2017 Share Posted March 21, 2017 I think breaking up four times shows a lack of compatibility and maturity for both involved parties. Link to post Share on other sites
dumbass2 Posted March 21, 2017 Share Posted March 21, 2017 Breaking up 4 times says enough. You two together just doesn't work right now. You really need to stay away from contacting her or more problems will arise. You need time away from dating to look back on this relationship and really work on things you know you need improvement on because breaking up with someone 4 times is an issue. You will never progress with yourself while you stay in contact with her. Link to post Share on other sites
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