LookAtThisPOst Posted February 2, 2017 Share Posted February 2, 2017 Found this pretty interesting. I was a member of a social group/Meetup for a time and one of the women there were married, supposedly "Happily" It was a social club, but most of the people in this club were unattached/single. She was one of few people that was actually married. I always found something odd about her that she'd always show up without her husband, even though he worked night shifts on the weekends. Anyway, she was a member of the group for years,would hang out with us and have a blast. She never flirted nor strayed though, got to give her credit for that and always kept her ring on her finger. The group kind of fizzled out there, but some people still stayed in touch and hung out. A male friend of mine she was pretty tight with, only platonic as he was a much older man (retiree), but considered a sweet guy that she'd text him to come out to see live bands with her/his friends. She'd keep him on the pulse. Same with other guys/gals, etc. We'd even occasionally chat about stuff, about dating and how her female single friends are struggling with it. lol All of a sudden, the texts stopped...she fell off the radar for months, even with him and some other people. She unfriended me from Facebook and her last name changed on the site. I thought nothing of it, until weeks later I saw her on a dating site. lol I sent her a PM asking her how her holidays were...to see if she responds, but I was wondering if she unfriended me because she recently divorced and didn't want me knowing about it? Talked to some other people in her circles and turns out she's unfriended quite a few people since her divorce. Just curious, is it uncool to do this? Does this mean their friendship with their friends wasn't genuine? Link to post Share on other sites
PrettyEmily77 Posted February 2, 2017 Share Posted February 2, 2017 A divorce can be a very traumatic experience for some, so she may have wanted a fresh start with a clean state. You say she unfriended quite a few people since her divorce - doesn't look like there was any intent to alienate her guy friends specifically, which means there is no reason to turn this one-off, individual case into a generality... Link to post Share on other sites
amaysngrace Posted February 2, 2017 Share Posted February 2, 2017 The fact that she went through divorce without you even knowing about it suggests to me that you weren't a close enough friend to even be bothered by her un-friending you. Why don't you ask her out on a date on the dating site you found her on since you seem very interested in her and you're not really in her friend zone? Link to post Share on other sites
Author LookAtThisPOst Posted February 2, 2017 Author Share Posted February 2, 2017 The fact that she went through divorce without you even knowing about it suggests to me that you weren't a close enough friend to even be bothered by her un-friending you. Why don't you ask her out on a date on the dating site you found her on since you seem very interested in her and you're not really in her friend zone? Actually...I had contacted her through Facebook via PM since we've chatted before via FB. Link to post Share on other sites
amaysngrace Posted February 2, 2017 Share Posted February 2, 2017 Actually...I had contacted her through Facebook via PM since we've chatted before via FB. What? I thought she un-friended you? Link to post Share on other sites
Author LookAtThisPOst Posted February 2, 2017 Author Share Posted February 2, 2017 What? I thought she un-friended you? Yeah, so? We've chatted on FB before. We know each other from real life multiple events. The fact she unfriended me is irrelevant. Maybe she unfriended me because she was cleaning out of people that she had not been in contact with for a while. I do that on occasion myself. If I emailed her on a dating site, it'd probably go unnoticed among the 100s of emails she's probably getting. lol Link to post Share on other sites
SoulCat Posted February 2, 2017 Share Posted February 2, 2017 She could have unfriended a bunch of people on FB out of self-preservation. As PrettyEmily stated, divorce is often a traumatic event that can leave you feeling very vulnerable. Not all FB friends are actual friends. Some folk feed on the drama of others. Some people see the newly divorced status as the go-ahead sign to start asking them out. The amount of guys that came out of the woodwork (especially via FB) when word got out about my divorce was quite unnerving. I was emotionally nowhere near ready to even entertain the thought of dating again so I ended up unfriending and blocking a number of people. Link to post Share on other sites
NuevoYorko Posted February 3, 2017 Share Posted February 3, 2017 She's not an actual friend of yours. You had "occasional" chatting over FB. Whatever is going on in her personal life is not your concern. I imagine she's not troubling herself about what your personal life looks like either. I find it fascinating that you spend so much time judging women who you've seen peripherally at meetups, or often have never met at all. What gives? 1 Link to post Share on other sites
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