7 years no commitment should i call it quits ?

[truelovetaurus1992]

So recently me and my boyfriend just made 7 years. I was expecting something thoughtful on his part to celebrate our anniversary, I mean come on its been 7 years . What do I get nothing just a "happy anniversary ", no card, a flower, nothing. I'm not a materialistic person anything coming from him would of made me feel special. I have been patient all these years waiting if he will ever propose and finally show me he is committed. I'm so tired of waiting around feeling like I'm wasting my time, lately I have been thinking of breaking up with him and focusing on my self for while.... am I being immature, should I talk to him about it or should I just move on ?

any opinions will be appreciated.

[RecentChange]

Do you live together?

 

Have you two discussed marriage?

 

For me anniversaries aren't important - but being on the same page regarding commitment and future is vital.

 

So - 7 years. What are your mutual plans for the future?

[Redhead14]

So recently me and my boyfriend just made 7 years. I was expecting something thoughtful on his part to celebrate our anniversary, I mean come on its been 7 years . What do I get nothing just a "happy anniversary ", no card, a flower, nothing. I'm not a materialistic person anything coming from him would of made me feel special. I have been patient all these years waiting if he will ever propose and finally show me he is committed. I'm so tired of waiting around feeling like I'm wasting my time, lately I have been thinking of breaking up with him and focusing on my self for while.... am I being immature, should I talk to him about it or should I just move on ?

any opinions will be appreciated.

 

You've been with him 7 years? Has there never been a conversation about what each of your goals were for a/the relationship?

 

Of course you should talk to him. "hey, Xname, we've been together for 7 years. I want a family by Xtime and I am hoping that you want the same thing. Can we start making plan for the future?" If he dodges it or dismisses you, you end the relationship because you two don't have the same life goals.

[d0nnivain]

I too am interested to know if you have ever talked about it. That seems to be the first step.

 

 

I always advise that for dating anniversaries you mention your expectations well in advance. If you say nothing & the other person does nothing, you kind of set yourself up for failure & disappointment.

[mightycpa]

Oh, you want to get married? How many kids do you have together?

 

Other people are asking if you've talked about it. I think you're beyond that step.

 

If you have, and he's not produced a ring, then your two choices are ultimatum and leaving unannounced.

 

If you haven't, then I have to wonder what's taken you so long? Any couple that has been together for seven years and has never even broached the subject of marriage shouldn't get married. Just go in that case.

[aileD]

How old are you?

 

Agree that you need to talk to him. Have you ever talked about your future?

[spiderowl]

I would not recommend an ultimatum. The reason I say that is that he will feel put on the spot and resent that. Also - and perhaps more importantly - it puts the decision in his hands. Why should you put your power in his hands? You could sound him out about marriage and then say something like 'I wonder if we are on the same page here about commitment', then leave him to think about it. Quite honestly, I would not ask him about marriage or put him on the spot. I would just decide how much time to give him to propose and exit if it doesn't happen. He has to know that marriage is something you value though or he might not even think of it.