Is it common for girls (even guys) to get jealous when people say...

[ZayKayWill]

that their sister/brother or friends are hot? I've noticed this mostly with girls, that if you say that their friend is hot they think it means that they think that that friend or sister is hotter than they are. Like if they were looking at a picture or something. I remember a long time ago back in the AIM days, I told a friend that I thought her sister was hot, and she blocked me for a short time...also remember a friend getting offended when a guy said that her sister was hot. Apparently that means that he thinks that she's hotter than her...which I guess I can see...*shrug* I guess I'm wondering how does one avoid that problem? Is there any way to avoid it? Even if they are hotter, that doesn't mean that they aren't good looking...idk.

[PrettyEmily77]

Don't care much about a comment on a friend's or a celebrity's hotness, but one of my exes used to often tell me his exes were hot, specifically as a way to dent my self-esteem. It worked for a while, until it didn't.

 

So yeah, I would recommend avoiding making these sorts of comments or skillfully changing the subject if a question like that comes up, especially if you know your partner is sensitive to that sort of stuff or a little body-conscious.

[Lilyana76]

That all depends....

 

If it was a man I am in a relationship with and he says my best friend is hot.. or oogles her in front of me, yeah it would make me mad if they never made me feel like I was hot or if they never oogled me.

 

If its a random guy that says to me.. dang your best friend is hot! I'd say, You're damn right she is! And not be jealous about it at all.

[stillafool]

If they get jealous because a friend is being complimented they are not truly a friend. Good friends recognize the positive things in their friends and would agree with the person who is complimenting them. Jealous people are not your friend. Just say what you feel and don't worry about the other's reaction.

[smackie9]

Jeeeezzzz Louis! It's not a big deal! Some people do feel a little let down....that expression "What am I? chopped liver?!" It's perfectly normal to feel a twinge of jealousy.....and even feel worse for teenagers or young 20's......still at that self conscience stage. It doesn't mean you are being a bad person.

 

It's immature to block and shut someone down for it tho for sure.....they need to just suck it up.

 

Mature people learn that there will always be someone more attractive than you and will drawn more attention. Just part of life.

[Clockwork]

As a brother/son, it was weird the rare time anyone said that about my sister or mom. Luckily it almost never happened, but there are some guys who had wickedly hot sisters or moms and they hated when it was mentioned. I mean, it is your sister or mom. You get a weird feeling when you hear that which I can't describe. No, not jealousy of course, but.............I don't know..........."ickiness"? Is that a word?

[anduina]

If my boyfriend said it, it would bother me since it's rude to do so. If I was interested in the guy assuming I was single, he'd likely be friend zoned for that statement since that tells me that he's either rude, has no idea that I'm interested, is trying to make me jealous or he's interested in another. If a male friend or relative said it, it wouldn't bother me.

[ZayKayWill]

If my boyfriend said it, it would bother me since it's rude to do so. If I was interested in the guy assuming I was single, he'd likely be friend zoned for that statement since that tells me that he's either rude, has no idea that I'm interested, is trying to make me jealous or he's interested in another. If a male friend or relative said it, it wouldn't bother me.

 

While I do see where you're coming from, just remember that he's with you for a reason. It's a bit unrealistic to assume that guys don't look at other girls and think that they're hot, same for you. I would think it's safe to assume that there are times when you see other guys aside from your bf and think that they're good looking. It would hurt most people, though.

[basil67]

Is there any way to avoid it? Try keeping your mouth shut

[ExpatInItaly]

While I do see where you're coming from, just remember that he's with you for a reason. It's a bit unrealistic to assume that guys don't look at other girls and think that they're hot, same for you. I would think it's safe to assume that there are times when you see other guys aside from your bf and think that they're good looking. It would hurt most people, though.

 

Oh, come on now. It's not exactly the brightest idea for a guy to comment on the hotness of his girlfriend's sister/best friend/close relation. Likewise, a woman should also have a little more decency than to tell her boyfriend how hot she thinks his brother or best buddy is.

 

Common courtesy should be enough to know when to keep certain thoughts to oneself regarding a partner's friend or family member.

 

It's not about jealousy - it's about respect.

[Tribble]

While I do see where you're coming from, just remember that he's with you for a reason. It's a bit unrealistic to assume that guys don't look at other girls and think that they're hot, same for you. I would think it's safe to assume that there are times when you see other guys aside from your bf and think that they're good looking. It would hurt most people, though.

 

Definitely unrealistic to assume guys don't find other girls hot. It is realistic, however, not expect someone not to mention it. Do you not have a filter?

 

I am not a jealous person at all. However, I am insecure but realistic. When I'm with someone, I know they're going to find other people but they are with me and being with me isn't purely physical. It's how you handle it. Mention celebrities are hot - fine. I used to work with an ex and we would talk about how so and so had great legs, or a great bum (and tell them hahaha). It was fine because it was true and he wasn't oggling or wishing he could be with them. If I guy I was seeing met my best friend and was all 'wow, she's hot', I would find that in bad taste and be uncomfortable. It's a fine line and difficult to tread but that is a little too close to home for me.

[elaine567]

While I do see where you're coming from, just remember that he's with you for a reason. It's a bit unrealistic to assume that guys don't look at other girls and think that they're hot, same for you. I would think it's safe to assume that there are times when you see other guys aside from your bf and think that they're good looking.

It would hurt most people, though.

 

That is why it is best to say nothing, why would you want to deliberately hurt the people you are supposed to love and care about?

There is no need to go through life being brutally honest and upsetting people right left and centre.

Everyone knows who the hot people are, there is no need to point them out unless of course you DO mean to hurt the person you are with.

There will always be the implication assumed that "They are hot, you are not so hot" so best just to keep that info to yourself.

 

Also who wants a gf/bf who is always checking out the competition?

[stillafool]

I definitely agree to keep your mouth shut in these situations but also keep a handkerchief handy to wipe the droll. It's telling.

[ZayKayWill]

That is why it is best to say nothing, why would you want to deliberately hurt the people you are supposed to love and care about?

There is no need to go through life being brutally honest and upsetting people right left and centre.

Everyone knows who the hot people are, there is no need to point them out unless of course you DO mean to hurt the person you are with.

There will always be the implication assumed that "They are hot, you are not so hot" so best just to keep that info to yourself.

 

Also who wants a gf/bf who is always checking out the competition?

 

Yeah. That's fair.