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No Contact/coping


Sweetfish

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In regards to no contract, I have an iron fist. I am aware that once a relationship dissolves it is best to be away from each other. Take the time to reflect and just move foward. Im a big advocate of also getting rid of anything that reminds you of your ex. It makes the healimg process easier and faster... for me that is... it takes months to repair what is lost and im well aware.

 

However, today I was blindsided. I went to get something to eat at a food chain known for the healthy subs and soups they serve. Haven't been there for months. I walk in and order some food and get to the cashier. She is like, "where is your wife" (people assumed we were married all the time) and I was totally left speechless. Had no idea what to say.

 

I just let out a, "Oh, she's gone" knowning leaving a hint of distress and I left feeling uneasy. Im thinking omg I hope my ex never comes here ever again lmao

 

Has anyone else been blindslided like this? Un-expected people asking about your ex?

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Yea - more than once. It comes from the people who are not close enough to know your situation but have seen you with your ex often enough to know you were a couple.

 

Last time when I was at the vet with my dog. I ran into the women I (we) adopted her from. Because my dog has gotten me through the worst 6 months of my life I'm not only super attached to her but she has become my savior so to speak.

 

Because of this, I was especially emotional when thanking the woman and gave her a hug. While I was saying goodbye she said "Say hi to your girlfriend for me!" to which I replied "Oh, that's done".

 

There were 4 women in the office who let out a collective "Awwww...."

 

I had to run out before I burst into tears.

 

Yea, it sucks.

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It happens. The poor clerk was just being friendly; normally remembering a customer is a good thing.

 

 

I broke up with an EX 16 years ago. I have been married for 8. Last spring I went back to my grad school alma mater & a former professor commented about how much he liked my EX & I together & how he wished we'd made it. I was stunned.

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Yep.

My ex and I used to go to a chain pub place that was quite nice, and often ended up with the same server. A really friendly american dude.

 

I went there a couple of months ago with my son. My son went to the toilet and the american dude clocked me and came over and asked where she was. I just umm-ed and ahh-ed for a bit, and he said "Oh, I understand. Sorry Sir".

 

I don't blame him at all. He was doing his job, and to be fair he does it bloody well. That screwed with my head for days though. I haven't been back since.

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Sure, it happens all the time. Some people even ask about my ex-wife, and we broke up six years ago. But it can be even worse. A few months ago I introduced my then girlfriend, who's German (blonde, blue eyes, tall) to some people at a bar and one girl says, "Oh yeah, we've met in the past". She meant my previous girlfriend, who was British and also blonde, blue-eyed and tall. The Frau didn't like exactly like it.

Edited by keiji
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