should i leave him?

[starlight]

Me and my husband have been married for four years, he is a good provider and he was a good husband. Last year he was promoted to a supervisor which I thought was great but, it has seemed to kill our relationship in many ways. We have had nothing but trouble since then. We have two kids and he is a good father to them when he is around but, he works graveyard and all he wants to do is sleep. He will sleep all day and all night until time for him to go to work. Lately he gets very short with me and hollars at me a lot and I dont know why. On Sundays I go visit my parents and he is usually sleeping because he has to work that night but, the last three Sundays he has gotten up when I leave and I wander why he doesnt get up when im home only when im gone does he get up. I cant help but get angry because it makes me feel like he doesnt want to be around me. I have asked him to get some sleep early during the day so that he can spend some time with up but he doesnt we got into a real big argument the other night and i am tired of taking care of our children by myself and having no companion so i am ready to leave him but i love him a lot i told him that i was leaving him and he said that he done the best that he could do and if it wasnt good enough than maybe we should get a divorce so i wander since he is taking this so easy if this is probably what he wants i just dont know but im tired of being mentally abused from him he ignores me and acts as if he really doesnt want to be with me there is a lot more to it than this but this is the main reason we are having trouble please give me some advice Thanks!!!!!!

[Tony T]

Do you have a hidden camera on him to watch him get up after you leave? How do you know this? How do you know he doesn't get up for a few minutes and go back to sleep?

 

There are many people whose body clocks are severely affected by changes in sleep patterns. Suddenly working nights after sleeping at that time for many years can be chaotic to some people's systems.

 

Talk to him. See if he wants to remain married. See where his head is at. It could very well be that he is suffering from some sort of depression as a result of this night shift and his powerlessness to do anything about it. How long will it be before he goes to an evening or day shift?

 

If he's going to be doing this night shift thing for a very long time, ask him if he would be willing to find other work in order to save his marriage.

 

If he seems intent on things remaining just like they are, you have no choice but to find a companion who will be available to you, at least sometime. You seem to be willing to compromise here but your husband doesn't seem to want to do anything but sleep.

 

If there are no medical reasons for his sleeping all the time (get him to see a doctor), he needs to understand when you married him you did not do so with the knowledge that all he would do is sleep and work throughout his life. Let him know you truly appreciate his dedication to providing for his family but you also want the pleasure of his quality company, at least some of the time.

 

I'd still like to know how you are aware of him getting up when you leave the house.

[slimjim]

Me and my husband have been married for four years, he is a good provider and he was a good husband. Last year he was promoted to a supervisor which I thought was great but, it has seemed to kill our relationship in many ways. We have had nothing but trouble since then. We have two kids and he is a good father to them when he is around but, he works graveyard and all he wants to do is sleep. He will sleep all day and all night until time for him to go to work. Lately he gets very short with me and hollars at me a lot and I dont know why. On Sundays I go visit my parents and he is usually sleeping because he has to work that night but, the last three Sundays he has gotten up when I leave and I wander why he doesnt get up when im home only when im gone does he get up. I cant help but get angry because it makes me feel like he doesnt want to be around me. I have asked him to get some sleep early during the day so that he can spend some time with up but he doesnt we got into a real big argument the other night and i am tired of taking care of our children by myself and having no companion so i am ready to leave him but i love him a lot i told him that i was leaving him and he said that he done the best that he could do and if it wasnt good enough than maybe we should get a divorce so i wander since he is taking this so easy if this is probably what he wants i just dont know but im tired of being mentally abused from him he ignores me and acts as if he really doesnt want to be with me there is a lot more to it than this but this is the main reason we are having trouble please give me some advice Thanks!!!!!!