Fallen_Angel Posted July 24, 2005 Share Posted July 24, 2005 I'm 3+ months removed from my first major relationship. Boo freaking hoo. I spend waaaay too much time thinking about it. Since the end of the relationship I've switched jobs (I know, two major life changes at once! Sheesh!). My last job only had 12 other employees. This new place has over 500. Talk about an adjustment! There is one very cute guy who started the same day I did and works in the same general department I do. I've said maybe a handful of words to him. Two weeks ago I saw him as I was walking back from the convenience store during lunch; I said hello (well, more like mumbled b/c I was scared!) and he sorta/kinda smiled. Would it be completely weird if I asked him to have lunch one day? (ie if I saw him while I was walking to, say, the convenience store during lunch and asked him.) I mean, when I think about it and try to describe it here it sounds oh so simple, but then again it's also 2 A.M.! I figure when I DO see him there's a good chance my mouth will go dry and I'll forget my own name. Any thoughts/suggestions and the like are appreciated. Link to post Share on other sites
AndrewJ Posted July 24, 2005 Share Posted July 24, 2005 Go for gold! If he gives u that funny feeling in your tummy seize the day All the best Link to post Share on other sites
agnf666 Posted July 24, 2005 Share Posted July 24, 2005 I happen to like the guy im working with too. I just haven't siezed the day with that yet. I guess that will happen shortly. I would go for it!!!! If you knwo in your gut that it feels right then do it. Have no regerts if it doesn't turn out well. Atleast you tried!!!! Good Luck.. Keep us posted! Link to post Share on other sites
Author Fallen_Angel Posted July 25, 2005 Author Share Posted July 25, 2005 Saw him today... Hehe. I was away all of last week. Seems he got even cuter! Gosh, I am such a sap. Anyway, as I saw him in the hallway I wasn't about to ask him anything. I didn't want other people to overhear! So I smiled (I think!) and he kinda smiled and that was that. I figure tomorrow I'll leave the building for lunch and I hope and pray I "run into" him. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Fallen_Angel Posted July 26, 2005 Author Share Posted July 26, 2005 I'm replying to my own reply. I need help. So I was driving to the bar to meet my friend and I was approaching a light, so I slowed down. In my rearview I see a car approaching in the next lane with a green license plate on the front. (My hottie has Vermont plates on his wheels.) I figured, nah, I must be hallucinating. Nevermind spotting a VT tag in PA is pretty rare, but regardless... IT WAS HIM!!!!!!!! I was literally beside myself. I KNOW he has to know my car, because he's driven behind me after work a few times. We both use I-95 to go home, but I'm relatively sure he lives in NJ because he bears right to go north, and I turn left to go south. Plus I have one of those alumni things on the back of my car...not like no one else in the world has one, but I figure it does make it stand out a little. I tried really hard to stay calm. I'm so glad I had my sunglasses on, but I couldn't hide an ear-to-ear grin. His windows were up, or else I would have tried to say something. I don't know why I didn't honk my horn. I noticed he was "oh so discreetly" looking in his rearview mirror, so as not to be obvious by turning straight around to look at me?!?! Yes, this is all pretty pathetic, but mind you I haven't been this happy in months. And this is so insignificant! Oh well. I hope I see him tomorrow so I can ask him if he's stalking me. (FYI he had some guy in the car with him, so obviously odds are he has a friend who lives near me.) Link to post Share on other sites
MWC_LifeBeginsAt40 Posted July 26, 2005 Share Posted July 26, 2005 So strike up a conversation next time you see him. You could break the ice by saying something about your new jobs, and about how you're both adjusting. Maybe it will lead to him asking YOU out for lunch??? Is he single? that is important. Link to post Share on other sites
alphamale Posted July 26, 2005 Share Posted July 26, 2005 Originally posted by Fallen_Angel Would it be completely weird if I asked him to have lunch one day? Yes...if you like your job and getting a paycheck then heed my advice. Never date anyone you work with, no exceptions. Link to post Share on other sites
Marshbear Posted July 26, 2005 Share Posted July 26, 2005 Originally posted by alphamale Yes...if you like your job and getting a paycheck then heed my advice. Never date anyone you work with, no exceptions. Amen Alpha...... Link to post Share on other sites
Author Fallen_Angel Posted July 27, 2005 Author Share Posted July 27, 2005 Originally posted by alphamale Yes...if you like your job and getting a paycheck then heed my advice. Never date anyone you work with, no exceptions. Maybe you're right, Alpha...mayyyyybe. I know my decision-making processes are a wee bit skewered right now because 1) I'm still healing. 2) This is a new job! 3) Did I mention he is really hot?!?! My thing is, this place has over 500 employees. My old job had 12. So yes, while this guy does work in the same overall department, I don't see him all the time. Case in point...did I see him today, right when I was ready to spring a flirty sort of comment re: last night? Of course not. D'oh. Link to post Share on other sites
MWC_LifeBeginsAt40 Posted July 27, 2005 Share Posted July 27, 2005 Originally posted by alphamale Yes...if you like your job and getting a paycheck then heed my advice. Never date anyone you work with, no exceptions. I strongly disagree. Alot of peole have met their life partner at work and it did not affect their jobs in any way whatsoever. I have seen many articles written on this concept that it's a great place to meet someone. You have to get past the immaturities that sometimes happen in a relationship especially if it doesn't work out. Also it is important to keep work strictly business and professional, but whatever goes on outside the office is nobody's business but your own. I'm assuming here that lunch break is NOT company time. Link to post Share on other sites
alphamale Posted July 27, 2005 Share Posted July 27, 2005 Originally posted by MWC_LifeBeginsAt40 I strongly disagree. Alot of peole have met their life partner at work and it did not affect their jobs in any way whatsoever. You're talking about the very small percentage of work relationships that end up working out or ending in marriage. The vast majority don't work out and cause major strife for the employees. It is a double-edged sword dating at work cause it is probably one of the best places to find people with things in common but having a romantic relationship with a co-worker can end in disaster, and usually does. Link to post Share on other sites
ziggue Posted July 27, 2005 Share Posted July 27, 2005 I remember this guy I had a huge crush on years ago ended up getting with someone else in the work place which I was really jealous about at the time but dealt with it. Lol. They both ended up leaving and doing other things. Probably so they didn't have to see eachother at work everyday. Last I heard they were engaged. It does happen. Link to post Share on other sites
alphamale Posted July 27, 2005 Share Posted July 27, 2005 Originally posted by ziggue Last I heard they were engaged. It does happen. of course it happens ZIGGUE...but it is the exception and not the rule. Link to post Share on other sites
MWC_LifeBeginsAt40 Posted July 27, 2005 Share Posted July 27, 2005 The majority of relationships that don't work out, do not necessarily end up a disaster. I met my exH where we worked. We were on different shifts, and eventually after we had been dating, we were both on days and it worked out great. It wasn't a big office, maybe 100 people. Our separation had nothing to do with work since we haven't worked together in 14 years. There were alot of married couples in that company who are still married to this day and that was over 15 yrs ago. It depends on the individual and the atmosphere in the office. But I do know another "snooty" company where a couple got together and ended up getting married before anyone even knew they were dating. They too have been married over 15 years and still work together IN THE SAME DEPT of this large 6000 employee company. They didn't bring their dating into the open because it was "one of those companies" (ie. office gossip galore). We meet the love of our life in all different kinds of places. I don't understand why work should be an exception. It's how you handle the relationship that the problems may arise. Link to post Share on other sites
alphamale Posted July 27, 2005 Share Posted July 27, 2005 Originally posted by MWC_LifeBeginsAt40 I met my exH where we worked. I rest my case... Link to post Share on other sites
westernxer Posted July 27, 2005 Share Posted July 27, 2005 Work is generally not a good place to date people. However, if you're looking to have an affair, work is the perfect place. Link to post Share on other sites
MWC_LifeBeginsAt40 Posted July 27, 2005 Share Posted July 27, 2005 Originally posted by alphamale I rest my case... Our separation had nothing to do with work since we haven't worked together in 14 years. We are both still friends with alot of people we worked with back then. Our marriage breakup was far from a disaster. I'm just sayin. yes Westernxr ... work is a great place for affairs cuz those always work out wiht the MM or MW leaving their SO for the coworker and living happily ever after and never end in disaster or harassment cases Link to post Share on other sites
Author Fallen_Angel Posted July 27, 2005 Author Share Posted July 27, 2005 Maybe this guy is avoiding me, because I didn't see him today. Strange, because I saw him in MY town, so it's not as though I was stalking!! Oh well. There's always tomorrow, I suppose. Another funny thing about this new company I'm with is that a handful of employees HAVE found romance on the job. Two of them got married, and in fact they are more or less the hot guy's supervisors. Another woman in my department met her husband there as well. The girl who sits at the desk across from me has a boyfriend in another department. Another girl in the department is engaged to the brother of the first woman! (one of Mr. Hottie's supervisors). Something in the water, perhaps?! Link to post Share on other sites
Zephyr45 Posted July 28, 2005 Share Posted July 28, 2005 Relationships are going to happen at almost every company and I don't think there is anything wrong with it per se. You should be cautious though, make sure what is acceptible, what the policy is, and what the veteran employees have to think about. Companies are like High School, and they will have something to say about every relationship that there has been and whether or not it was a good or bad thing. My company has 10 times as many people as yours, and it's rare to find someone who isn't dating someone else who works there! (Note though, that we have different buildings around town so it is actually possible to never see or interact with your SO at work, making things not much different than if they worked somewhere else) Heck, I work with a married couple. I know I guy who's boss is his wife! (ain't that got to sting. She's his boss in life and at work!) Another couple that met at work and just got engaged. I could go on and on. Generally things seem to work out positively. Link to post Share on other sites
westernxer Posted July 29, 2005 Share Posted July 29, 2005 Originally posted by Zephyr45 Companies are like High School... Great, another reason to hate high school. Link to post Share on other sites
alphamale Posted July 29, 2005 Share Posted July 29, 2005 Originally posted by Zephyr45 Companies are like High School, actually, I would extrapolate to say that life is just like high school. same exact sheeyot goes on except people are a bit nicer and try not to hurt your feelings as much. high school prepares you for adult life in many many ways.... Link to post Share on other sites
AMBOMB72 Posted July 30, 2005 Share Posted July 30, 2005 Originally posted by Fallen_Angel Maybe this guy is avoiding me, because I didn't see him today. Strange, because I saw him in MY town, so it's not as though I was stalking!! Doesn't seem likely. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Fallen_Angel Posted July 31, 2005 Author Share Posted July 31, 2005 Originally posted by AMBOMB72 Doesn't seem likely. Ah, who knows. I saw him Thursday and I panicked. Suddenly I wasn't "ready" like I was on Tuesday! Right after our eyes met I looked down and kept on walking. Arrrrrrrrrrrgh. This IS a lot like high school! Sheesh! I thought I left 9th grade behind, but it never totally goes away, does it?! Link to post Share on other sites
alphamale Posted July 31, 2005 Share Posted July 31, 2005 Originally posted by Fallen_Angel This IS a lot like high school! Sheesh! I thought I left 9th grade behind, but it never totally goes away, does it?! nope Link to post Share on other sites
AMBOMB72 Posted July 31, 2005 Share Posted July 31, 2005 I have an idea. The next time you walk by him, make sure he sees you and then turn around and look at him when you pass him. If he's looking back (checking you out), he likes you. Link to post Share on other sites
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