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Coparenting schedules for those that aren't 50\50 or NC


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Having a lot of difficult finding information and experience from people who travel for a living or started new families. What did you find was a good balance between keeping your life intact, and keeping the kids connected?

 

Skype is a huge help, but its obviously not a replacement to 1:1 real time.

 

Anytime this gets brought up around people that have never been divorced it divides into two camps, either you are a parental hero, or scum of the earth deadbeat.

 

For those that travel for a living, what was the best balance you found? Those that started new families, what was the best balance you found?

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I limit my traveling so that I can retain 50/50. My company knows it's the way it is with me. And I make sure my value is otherwise unquestionable.

 

Has that had a negative effect on my career? Yes. I made a choice based on priorities.

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I limit my traveling so that I can retain 50/50. <snip> Has that had a negative effect on my career? Yes. I made a choice based on priorities.

 

Yes, I think everyone understands this already. This thread is actually about people who do not have 50\50 schedules :cool:

bpdftl,

 

Do you mean that *if* you did have 50/50 custody, then you would be able to set your priorities so that your first priority would be to be physically present for all of

your '50' time -- but, since you don't have 50/50, you are precluded from being able to set the same priority - for whatever custody arrangement you actually do have? :confused:.

 

Sorry if I'm not understanding correctly.

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I met one person a few years ago who was in sales. So the mother took the kid Monday-Thursday and the Father did Friday-Sunday every week. It's not exactly 50/50 but it worked for them.

 

Since you travel, is there a way to arrange some time off-site or only travel part of the week like Monday-Thursday instead of Monday-Friday?

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Basically just trying to find "workable arrangements" first and then negotiate the rest. Everyone has their own quarks, but I think its important to find the other intangibles too.

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I don't travel for my job, but the work schedules are set up based on seniority. Since I'm pretty new, I'm usually stuck with whatever schedule is left. My ex-husband has been pretty great in working with my schedule and letting me get the kids on whatever days off I have. It helps that he works for the same company and knows how the scheduling works and that the benefits of working for said company are pretty great. It also helps that we get along and both want what's best for the kids, which is having both parents be active in their lives.

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