Ex reaching out via my parents [UPDATED Is my ex-gf manipulating me via fb?]

[Redstar91]

Hoping to get some input from you guys. I'm not gonna respond tonight.

 

She did leave me on read the last time I responded to her phone calls to my mother... She ignored me for longer than a month.

 

But suppose I want to reconcile, what do I do here?

Edited April 7, 2017 by Redstar91

[Scarlett.O'hara]

I have to be honest, this girl sounds like a mess. Her behavior since the breakup only emphasizes the fact that nothing has changed.

 

If you respond to her request it will only allow the drama and games to continue for longer, and you will just be wasting your time.

 

Proceed at your own risk.

[ExpatInItaly]

I have to be honest, this girl sounds like a mess. Her behavior since the breakup only emphasizes the fact that nothing has changed.

 

If you respond to her request it will only allow the drama and games to continue for longer, and you will just be wasting your time.

 

Proceed at your own risk.

 

Agreed.

 

I wouldn't waste your time on her, OP. It's not likely to end well for you if you go back for Round 2.

[jamili]

I have to be honest, this girl sounds like a mess. Her behavior since the breakup only emphasizes the fact that nothing has changed.

 

If you respond to her request it will only allow the drama and games to continue for longer, and you will just be wasting your time.

 

Proceed at your own risk.

 

Maybe they are games.

 

But I think it's guilt. I think whole "meeting" idea is just her needing to dump some @#$% off her chest to ease the guilt and get closure. That's my guess. I don't think it's necessarily about games, I think she's just being selfish.

 

I could be wrong though. You could just go and see what's going on. Most likely scenarios: she will give you a bunch of crap about how she's sorry she hurt you, and say she wants to remain friends because she cares about you. You could hear her out in person, and then just calmly say that you aren't interested in friendship and go back to NC. That's if you can handle that.

 

You also could just stay NC.

[Redstar91]

Maybe they are games.

 

But I think it's guilt. I think whole "meeting" idea is just her needing to dump some @#$% off her chest to ease the guilt and get closure. That's my guess. I don't think it's necessarily about games, I think she's just being selfish.

 

I could be wrong though. You could just go and see what's going on. Most likely scenarios: she will give you a bunch of crap about how she's sorry she hurt you, and say she wants to remain friends because she cares about you. You could hear her out in person, and then just calmly say that you aren't interested in friendship and go back to NC. That's if you can handle that.

 

You also could just stay NC.

 

It's been 47 days of NC so far. I think i will hear her out, but not on the phone. We live an hour drive from each other, so she'll have to put in an effort.

[Redstar91]

Gave her some options when it would fit my schedule and she was going to contact me for a specific date later this week.

 

Now, 2 days later, she texted me she wanted to meet 'halfway', because we had to many memories in my town. She proposed we go to some random park, wich is a 70KM drive for me and a 30KM drive for her.

 

I respectfully declined.

[Ronnys93]

Gave her some options when it would fit my schedule and she was going to contact me for a specific date later this week.

 

Now, 2 days later, she texted me she wanted to meet 'halfway', because we had to many memories in my town. She proposed we go to some random park, wich is a 70KM drive for me and a 30KM drive for her.

 

I respectfully declined.

 

Good for you!

[Altair0770]

Oh crap am I late to the party?

 

If she contacts you about meeting up again, ask her what she wants to talk about. Get details out of her without giving any details. If she broke it, she must fix it.

 

As far as you know she could want you to meet to have a new boyfriend shank you. Or she could be looking to meet to get back together. Best to cut the bull**** and have them say it straight up.

[Redstar91]

As far as you know she could want you to meet to have a new boyfriend shank you. Or she could be looking to meet to get back together. Best to cut the bull**** and have them say it straight up.

 

99% sure that's not the case. Why would she contact my mom of all people?

 

She tried calling her one hour ago, again... Gotta love the drama!

Edited April 10, 2017 by Redstar91

[marky00]

"Hey A, I would like to have a conversation with you. I could not do this for a while to talk with you, I did not feel so good. If you’re up for it, we could have an open conversation. I’m offering this out of respect for you and that I think it would be good for us both if we talk to each other, but whatever you chose I will respect it. Love, B"

 

once again Jamili is spot on.

 

 

This is all about:

 

 

GUILT GUILT GUILT

 

 

I would not respond or follow up on the meetup if I was you. Think about it logically. Why would some dump you and then ask for a serious talk. It's not about a reconciliation.

 

 

She actually said she doesn't mind if you choose not to meet her. Heck, she may even be hoping you don't take her up on the offer.

 

 

I'm sorry for being harsh as I know your going through a tough time but I need to call it as I see it. Maybe in 6 months or so, she might reach out for reasons more beneficial to you. But right now this all about HER relieving her guilt.

Edited April 10, 2017 by marky00

[Redstar91]

I'm sorry for being harsh as I know your going through a tough time but I need to call it as I see it. Maybe in 6 months or so, she might reach out for reasons more beneficial to you. But right now this all about HER relieving her guilt.

 

No need to be sorry, I need to hear this.