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She wants to re-establish some independence?


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My ex broke up with me two months ago. We went out for 4 years and she is 19 years old; I am 22. So she tells me she wants to break up because she wants to be on her own, as an individual, does not want any type of relationship right now.

 

I know that she's very young and even though I'm good to her she still might want to be on her own to live life a little and experience it on her own two feet. Which is good because it would give her much needed ocnfidence in herself and independence; two thing she sorely needs. I know she's not looking for anything serious and just wants to hang with friends and have fun. She told me all she's been doing is hanging out with friends till late and stuff. Don't know how often but enough to where her parents are making her pay rent to stay at home.

 

I think this might be what is happening but I'm not sure. I know she thinks she might be missing out on something during her youth years but I'm not sure if she'll decide to come back or not. I've read from a couple of other threads where the girlfriend did the same thing: wanted to expereince uni., party hard and ended up coming back seeing the other side isn't as green, I guess.

 

I do however realize I have to move on and not pout after her, after all, I know I would def. never go back to someone who would cry about me during a breakup, like everyone says, it shows insecurity, weakness and everything else. I just hope things turn for the better. Only 2 months and I'm already feeling new and know what direction I have to go in for better or worse.

 

One more, I plan on doing NC at least for another 2-3 months just because I am thinking about this way too much right now and everyday I think something new about us and I don't want to say anything I'm gonna regret. But I'm as to whether I should call her tomorrow and wish her a happy b-day or just send her an e-mail. I know everyone says you have to make her miss you and all but if I don't recognize tomorrow, it might come off as immature?

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LucreziaBorgia

If you and she are on good terms, just send her a card or something. I'd avoid ecards - too much can be read into the messages. Just a plain card (get a belated birthday card if you have to) and mail it to her. Keep it short - just "Hope you have (had) a great birthday, take care, your name".

 

That shows you are acknowledging her birthday, with no other motive but than to be nice and wish her a good one. I see nothing wrong with that.

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