simon_uk Posted July 25, 2005 Share Posted July 25, 2005 I have to admit that after her sending me a text last week saying "I think I still Love You" I am really struggling not to contact her and spill my heart out. She later apologised for sending the message saying she was drunk but I still cant help believing that she really does love me and is just scared. Any Help much appreciated. simon Link to post Share on other sites
ReluctantRomeo Posted July 25, 2005 Share Posted July 25, 2005 Originally posted by simon_uk I still cant help believing that she really does love me and is just scared. Probably. Would you want her back? Link to post Share on other sites
Author simon_uk Posted July 25, 2005 Author Share Posted July 25, 2005 Without Question Link to post Share on other sites
sundrop Posted July 25, 2005 Share Posted July 25, 2005 liquid courage can be a good thing. She was probably being sincere in her text, liquid courage gives us the ability to do things we might not do when sobber. She may just be scared. You could always just feel her out and take things slow. I would do anything to get a text like that from my ex, Drunk or not. Good luck. Link to post Share on other sites
ReluctantRomeo Posted July 25, 2005 Share Posted July 25, 2005 Originally posted by simon_uk Without Question That's sweet. I'd play it really cool. Give it a couple of days, then see if you can invent some excuse for a casual meeting. Something ambiguous, like coffee or lunch, so she doesn't know if it's a date. I guess she's the dumper, so she needs to be the one to decisively "open the door" again. Be friendly, but ambiguous and cool. See where it leads. Good luck! Originally posted by sundrop I would do anything to get a text like that from my ex, Drunk or not. I understand this. Link to post Share on other sites
Author simon_uk Posted July 25, 2005 Author Share Posted July 25, 2005 Originally posted by sundrop I would do anything to get a text like that from my ex, Drunk or not. Good luck. Yes but when it is virtually retracted the next day it sucks big time!!! Link to post Share on other sites
sundrop Posted July 25, 2005 Share Posted July 25, 2005 I know the retraction sucked, But non the less I think she meant it, especially if it is something she expressed in the past. We tend to let our gaurd down when we are drunk a little more. I wouldn't stress to much over the retraction, maybe that was just an excuse to contact you again. Link to post Share on other sites
Author simon_uk Posted July 25, 2005 Author Share Posted July 25, 2005 Well to be honest sundrop I contacted her. I basically said "i dont know if you were drunk last night so maybe I shouldnt say anything but I would prefer it if thinsg were different" that is when she replied with "i am so sorry, I was thinking about you and I had had a drink" she asked if I was ok and I said "no I paid the price by losing you dont make me suffer anymore" she apologised again and I replied with "i am sorry to maybe one day you will understand what you meant to me" Too much I know. On Saturday I sent a message just saying "dont feel guilty we all do silly things when drunk, its cool, be good" Still ahvent heard anything but I still cant help wondering if she really does and is just scared. Duhhhhh! Link to post Share on other sites
sundrop Posted July 25, 2005 Share Posted July 25, 2005 Well good for you. ( I know most people will not agree because of the whole NC thing, being the ruler of the world on this website) But at least you are on speeking terms. And sounds to bee on good terms, because you can have a conversation. You told her where you stood and that is not easy for most guys and hopefully she will respect that. I would just do what you have been doing, be patient and let things heal. I wish you the best of luck. Link to post Share on other sites
ReluctantRomeo Posted July 25, 2005 Share Posted July 25, 2005 Originally posted by sundrop But at least you are on speeking terms. Yup. I'd still try meeting up one of these days. If you feel you can be cool about it. Link to post Share on other sites
Author simon_uk Posted July 25, 2005 Author Share Posted July 25, 2005 Well I would hardly say we were on speaking terms as she didnt reply to my message when I told he rnot to feel guilty and that was on saturday. I think I basically wanted to undserstand if she does love me. But I guess nobody knows that but her? Link to post Share on other sites
chris1063 Posted July 25, 2005 Share Posted July 25, 2005 Simon This is a difficult situation but I have to say if I were in your shoes I would definately want to know where I stand. I don't think you can hurt any more than you are anyway, whatever the outcome and at least you'll know one way or the other. Why not send a message asking if she would like to meet up or would like to talk things over. I don't think you've been apart that long ? If that's the case i'd say there's a chance there for you. If you don't at least try to initiate some discussion you might regret not taking a chance. Like I said - the indecision and wondering is going to tear you apart anyway. At least if you know if she wants or doesn't want you you'll either get back together or you can carry on with your life and get back to the healing process. I say go for it but go slowly and carefully and don't come across as being desparate or get emotional. Good Luck Chris Link to post Share on other sites
Lonestar Posted July 25, 2005 Share Posted July 25, 2005 Originally posted by sundrop We tend to let our gaurd down when we are drunk a little more. I wouldn't stress to much over the retraction, maybe that was just an excuse to contact you again. We also tend to get emotional when we're drunk. People go out looking for someone else and when they don't find someone when they're out trolling, the alcohol causes them to miss the ex, when in actuality, they're only missing a relationship. The next day they wake up and don't feel the same way. Don't trust anything like that from her again unless she's sober when she says it. Link to post Share on other sites
upsetnhurt Posted July 25, 2005 Share Posted July 25, 2005 Simon, Not so sure you are getting the best advice here as some of these posters don't know the history between the two of you. You are starting to turn into another one of these posters "CK____" in that you just won't take no for an answer.............your ex enjoys playing with you yet for some reason you think there is some merit to what she is saying....didn't she agree to delete your number from her phone so the next time she drinks she will avoid messing with you? That tells me alot that she did. Stay away and block her number from coming in to your phone. Move on and live life to its fullest. Can you honestly say that she is the right woman for you after what she has done? I tend to think she is the most convenient for you to deal with in your mind at the moment as you are so unmotivated to going out and finding someone better......I know its hard as we are all dealing with one problem or another on here....yet you were sounding so good other days and then this happends! I can't believe you would take her back! Could you ever look at her directly in the eyes again and know that she did not harm you? Link to post Share on other sites
Author simon_uk Posted July 25, 2005 Author Share Posted July 25, 2005 Everyday, like most people on here who have been dumped they pray that their lover will return. yes I know she has hurt me but then I guess I hurt her in some respects too. Now I am not saying what she is doing is right, far from it thats why I was a little harsh with her. Could I look her in the eyes? You bet I could! I don't truly believe she is doing this just to hurt me, if I did believe that then I would have ripped into her a lot more than I did. She has depression and she has a drink problem. I, I am a rescuer and more than wanting her back I just want her to be weel and be happy which she obviously isnt and I do feel partly responsible for that. I am not sad or obsessed. I truly love her very much! Link to post Share on other sites
pippen_2k Posted July 26, 2005 Share Posted July 26, 2005 Simon, Its not really fair on you what she did. She should have never have messaged you a text like that. Hell, I would have gotten my hopes up as well! But im sure you are well aware now.. after the months of grief and mixed messages that 'YOU NEVER LOOK TOO DEEP INTO A TEXT MESSAGE'. Most people in here get text's which give us hope, but after the constant let downs over time you think we would be used to it by now..... but nope.. we always fall back into the same traps. Its gonna cause you more pain replying to her and trying to contact her, cause you know she has NOTHING to say which will make you happy! Trust me..if she wanted to be back with you she would be.. she wouldnt be beating around the bush like this. You know what you gotta do, u have been through this for some time now.... at the end of the day aint you tired of hurting yourself? Link to post Share on other sites
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