LDR predicament, long post

[feelingsonder]

Hi everyone! I'm not one to seek advice on relationships, especially on such a wide platform- but I need some insight from different people on my situation here.

To start, I'm 19 years old and living in Arizona. I'd say I'm pretty smart and cautious with how I handle obstacles that come in my way. I've never been in any serious relationship and I'm not in any rush to date a guy. As far as casual dates go, I've usually been the one to break things off with guys because at the times I've been asked, relationships weren't on my mind and I needed to prioritize my time with school and stuff. I'm still a virgin and I'm not interested in the current hookup culture. With all this said, here's what I'm dealing with currently:

Theres a guy I've been talking to online who has some notoriety to his name (I won't release info for his sake). We met through twitter because of how I'd reply to his tweets with some wit and humor to them, which resulted in him messaging me. Safe to say that we clicked pretty quickly and we talked pretty often. It got to where we were talking so much that we exchanged skypes and other social media accs and we'd talk on multiple platforms almost everyday.

The first time we started video chatting was in November 2015 and I was so nervous, but once we started talking things went beautifully. He's really genuine, kind hearted, well spoken & has an amazing sense of humor that's caught my heart for nearly 3 years now. We were talking as friends for awhile and then things started to escalate around christmas. We started to call each other pet names and we'd made a conscious effort to keep in touch as much as we could and for as long as we could. He'd make efforts to respond to my tweets and comments before anyone else's and I've received some backlash from it (not that it bothers me but just to note). When we would skype he'd always have something nice to say about my looks, and in return I'd usually tell him something similar. I've been told I flirt naturally and without knowing I'm doing so, which might be a reason why things started to get more romantic. Christmas Day comes along and he says he really likes me and wants to know if I'd want to pursue anything serious with him, and I was shocked. Part of me wanted to act on my thoughts and say yes immediately, but I felt like it would be weird since I've never actually met him in person before. Also long distance relationships are a pain in the ass and I didn't want to stress myself out with another responsibility. I told him no and he was understanding- he looked a little visibly upset, but nevertheless understanding of my circumstances. Then a few months roll around in 2016 and we share the same birth month. Since our talk during the holidays I started to consider his offer on being his girlfriend, I mean why not right? I was gonna be free for the summer and I could spend more time with him and possibly meet him. So then the night before his birthday comes and I tell him that I've been thinking about us being an item and I tell him that I'm open to the idea. His face brightens up immediately and he tells me that that was the best news he got all day etc. and i wish him a happy birthday and stuff. Then two weeks later it's the day after my birthday, and that's when he tells me he's falling in love with me. I was infatuated by him and i told him that I loved him a lot and he meant so much to me and stuff. We became a thing for a few months (not officially or publicly though, but a few of our friends knew about us). This continued throughout the summer of 2016 into November when I found out that his previous two relationships failed because of him. I was passed some info from a "friend" of his (says a lot about the people he surrounds himself with eh?) and they were private messages that admitted that he was using his ex for her body and that he's not actually interested in her.

Although the information was from a few years prior to us talking, I still had some fear about being used in the same way. My first instinct was to talk to him about the leaked info and how ****ed up he was, but I was too afraid to argue with him because I didn't want to lose him. Instead I called him up on skype and we had a normal conversation until I asked him about his previous relationships. I figured this is important info to know in case I really am getting into something bad here with this guy. He told me that he hadn't been in a serious relationship for many years, but that he didn't want to be in a relationship again until he and I started talking. I told him that I needed to take a break and gather my thoughts about us, and I was already at a low point in my life so taking a break was very much needed anyway. He wasn't taking my words too kindly, but ultimately said that was fine with him and we went about our days.

Up until a week ago in 2017, we weren't talking at all- at least I wasn't talking to him. He'd send a message a few times a week until New Years when he said he loved me and hoped that I would come back to him and stuff. I felt a little guilty in the sense that I didn't want to seem like I was leading him on or anything, but there were things that I needed to consider about the both of us and our lifestyles and I'm still considering those things currently.

A week ago, however, I started a conversation with him and he replied a few hours late (no biggie though, his schedule is pretty hectic to begin with), and I asked him if he still wanted to become a couple, and he said he wants to be official, but he told me that he was having a hard time trusting me during our break and that he didn't want to be heartbroken again like what had happened to him several years ago. I told him that it would be a good idea to think about it some more and come back to me with a confident answer. He asked me if I had come to a conclusion about what we should do, and I told him that there were many different aspects to look at when it came to what we were doing, and that I wasn't too sure if I was ready to pursue anything further, but if he was willing to go further then I would try it out. Since then he hasn't wrote back yet and I don't know how else to go about this. This is where I need your guys' opinions and advice.

We share a lot of the same interests, morals and values- and I was telling him that I had never been in a serious relationship before and what I wanted in a relationship, and he completely understood to my surprise. I haven't sent him nudes or anything since it's against my own set of beliefs and such, and he understood that and respected me. We did have phone sex and he has sent me nudes. The really big things that are bothering me are that he lives across the U.S and the chances of either of us meeting each other is pretty slim, and I know that I'll get bored of it all eventually. Yet, I still want to give this all a try and see where we end up, because he really does mean a lot and I don't want to miss out on someone like him. The other big thing that worries me is our age gap. I'm 18 going on 19 soon, and he's 31 going on 32. We're at different stages in our lives and I don't wanna feel like a little kid to him and I don't want him to feel like he's an old hag compared to me (lol). Also, there's that fear of him using me to get his way like he did in his last fling, since younger women like myself can get manipulated by older guys without knowing it- and I really don't want to be another hit and run kind of girl to him. There's also the fact he told me he loved me while we were on a break, and I hope he wasn't just tossing that phrase around like it's a hello or something- I figure for his age he'd know when the right time to use that word would be lol. So far, he hasn't said anything to me personally that he had said to his ex, and he hasn't pressured me to do anything I wasn't comfortable with which is nice. He doesn't act hella creepy and weird when he talks about me like I'm some sex object, and he isn't a sex freak either. To note: when he first asked to get together with me around Xmas 2015, he didn't know my age, and we weren't doing anything at that time. With this all said, anything sexual we've done was done after my 18th birthday. So far throughout all of this, he's meant well and hasn't acted like a pervert towards me and stuff. I really like him as a friend and I can see us becoming an item and we're both legal adults, but with the above issues listed I can't come to a conclusion on what I want to happen. Sorry this is so long, but it's been bottled up for so long and I can't turn to anyone that I know without begin questioned like hell about who the guy is. If any of you have some advice that would be greatly appreciated! Thank you!

[basil67]

This was difficult to read without paragraph breaks, but I think I got the gist of it.

 

It's long distance, you're a naive 19yo (nothing wrong with that) and he's 31 and has a reputation of sorts, his mates don't recommend him as a partner and he's got some "notoriety" to his name.

 

All my alarm bells are ringing. What exactly does his notoriety involve? What do your parents and friends say about this? I have a daughter your age and my attitude about dating is fairly relaxed....but I'd be having kittens if my daughter was doing what you are.

Edited March 7, 2017 by basil67

[feelingsonder]

Sorry about the lack of paragraph breaks, I posted this on mobile and didn't check before posting.

 

I haven't told my parents since I've moved out. My friends say that I shouldn't go any further in a relationship with him because they don't like the gap, and I can completely get behind that. His friends told me it was my choice to make and they weren't exactly against the idea, nor were they 100% for it. Part of me feels weird thinking about dating him because he is older than me & the distance is pretty far. Not only that but nowadays I see him better off as a friend, kinda like how we originally started out. It's just confusing because I do have that lingering crush on him still and it's bugging me like crazy.

 

And I accidentally used notoriety instead of notability in one of the sentences, my apologies. I wouldn't say he's "famous" by any means, but he does post YouTube videos that get near to a million views every once in awhile and his following is a good size.

[ExpatInItaly]

32 to your 19 is a red flag, and you're wise to be concerned about that. It's a significant gap and more than a little odd that a man at his age was pursuing a teenager. I don't mean that as any disrespect to you, OP, as you come across as articulate and intelligent...but it says something about him. I would be wondering why he isn't aiming closer to his own age.

 

A lot this just doesn't smell right, OP. You are a woman who admittedly has little relationship or sexual experience (nothing wrong at all with that, by the way, and good for you for sticking to your guns) He knows this. He's got a reputation of sorts and has sent nudes to you. He's told you he loved you. And he's never met you? It just reeks of a guy looking to have a little fun with a young woman who doesn't yet have the experience to spot the trouble with this.

 

I would try to forget about him. There are too many warning signs that it won't end up well for you.

[anduina]

I'm 18 going on 19 soon, and he's 31 going on 32.

How old were you when you first started chatting in text? It's likely that he knew what you looked like on Twitter so your age wouldn't have been a secret to him.

 

Your friends are right. Step back from this guy.

[feelingsonder]

ExpatInItaly: I take no offense to your advice at all, in fact I'm very thankful for it! And I have wondered why he hasn't pursued someone around his own age, too, but I just shrugged it off for awhile because I didn't want to ruin the small flame we had for those few months. Now I realize that it's something that I shouldn'tve pushed aside and I'm really questioning what his motives were this whole time. And trust me, I felt weird when he told me he loved "me", rather his perception of me. Not to say that me telling him I loved him was any better, either though.

 

Anduina: I was 17 when we first started talking, but I hadn't posted any pictures of myself until after we started adding each other on different social media platforms a few months later- that's when he saw what I looked like. But you're correct in the sense that I do look my age, and he should've stepped back. And as for myself, I'll do myself the favor and step out of the situation. Now I just have to find a way to tell him that this isn't gonna work out. How I'll do so? Ill still figure that out. And if a similar situation happens to another girl around my age, I'll give them the warnings as well.

 

Thanks for the help guys, god knows where I'd be had I not reached out for some insight.

[anduina]

Tell him that this situation isn't a wise idea considering the distance and the age gap. In order to move on, you'll need to go no contact. If he respects your decision, then great. If he doesn't, you might get to see the ugly side of him and need to stop frequenting the same sites.

[BaileyB]

Hi everyone! I'm not one to seek advice on relationships, especially on such a wide platform- but I need some insight from different people on my situation here.

 

To start, I'm 19 years old and living in Arizona. I'd say I'm pretty smart and cautious with how I handle obstacles that come in my way. I've never been in any serious relationship and I'm not in any rush to date a guy. As far as casual dates go, I've usually been the one to break things off with guys because at the times I've been asked, relationships weren't on my mind and I needed to prioritize my time with school and stuff. I'm still a virgin and I'm not interested in the current hookup culture. With all this said, here's what I'm dealing with currently:

 

Theres a guy I've been talking to online who has some notoriety to his name (I won't release info for his sake). We met through twitter because of how I'd reply to his tweets with some wit and humor to them, which resulted in him messaging me. Safe to say that we clicked pretty quickly and we talked pretty often. It got to where we were talking so much that we exchanged skypes and other social media accs and we'd talk on multiple platforms almost everyday.

 

The first time we started video chatting was in November 2015 and I was so nervous, but once we started talking things went beautifully. He's really genuine, kind hearted, well spoken & has an amazing sense of humor that's caught my heart for nearly 3 years now. We were talking as friends for awhile and then things started to escalate around christmas. We started to call each other pet names and we'd made a conscious effort to keep in touch as much as we could and for as long as we could. He'd make efforts to respond to my tweets and comments before anyone else's and I've received some backlash from it (not that it bothers me but just to note). When we would skype he'd always have something nice to say about my looks, and in return I'd usually tell him something similar. I've been told I flirt naturally and without knowing I'm doing so, which might be a reason why things started to get more romantic. Christmas Day comes along and he says he really likes me and wants to know if I'd want to pursue anything serious with him, and I was shocked. Part of me wanted to act on my thoughts and say yes immediately, but I felt like it would be weird since I've never actually met him in person before. Also long distance relationships are a pain in the ass and I didn't want to stress myself out with another responsibility. I told him no and he was understanding- he looked a little visibly upset, but nevertheless understanding of my circumstances. Then a few months roll around in 2016 and we share the same birth month. Since our talk during the holidays I started to consider his offer on being his girlfriend, I mean why not right? I was gonna be free for the summer and I could spend more time with him and possibly meet him. So then the night before his birthday comes and I tell him that I've been thinking about us being an item and I tell him that I'm open to the idea. His face brightens up immediately and he tells me that that was the best news he got all day etc. and i wish him a happy birthday and stuff. Then two weeks later it's the day after my birthday, and that's when he tells me he's falling in love with me. I was infatuated by him and i told him that I loved him a lot and he meant so much to me and stuff. We became a thing for a few months (not officially or publicly though, but a few of our friends knew about us). This continued throughout the summer of 2016 into November when I found out that his previous two relationships failed because of him. I was passed some info from a "friend" of his (says a lot about the people he surrounds himself with eh?) and they were private messages that admitted that he was using his ex for her body and that he's not actually interested in her.

 

Although the information was from a few years prior to us talking, I still had some fear about being used in the same way. My first instinct was to talk to him about the leaked info and how ****ed up he was, but I was too afraid to argue with him because I didn't want to lose him. Instead I called him up on skype and we had a normal conversation until I asked him about his previous relationships. I figured this is important info to know in case I really am getting into something bad here with this guy. He told me that he hadn't been in a serious relationship for many years, but that he didn't want to be in a relationship again until he and I started talking. I told him that I needed to take a break and gather my thoughts about us, and I was already at a low point in my life so taking a break was very much needed anyway. He wasn't taking my words too kindly, but ultimately said that was fine with him and we went about our days.

 

Up until a week ago in 2017, we weren't talking at all- at least I wasn't talking to him. He'd send a message a few times a week until New Years when he said he loved me and hoped that I would come back to him and stuff. I felt a little guilty in the sense that I didn't want to seem like I was leading him on or anything, but there were things that I needed to consider about the both of us and our lifestyles and I'm still considering those things currently.

 

A week ago, however, I started a conversation with him and he replied a few hours late (no biggie though, his schedule is pretty hectic to begin with), and I asked him if he still wanted to become a couple, and he said he wants to be official, but he told me that he was having a hard time trusting me during our break and that he didn't want to be heartbroken again like what had happened to him several years ago. I told him that it would be a good idea to think about it some more and come back to me with a confident answer. He asked me if I had come to a conclusion about what we should do, and I told him that there were many different aspects to look at when it came to what we were doing, and that I wasn't too sure if I was ready to pursue anything further, but if he was willing to go further then I would try it out. Since then he hasn't wrote back yet and I don't know how else to go about this. This is where I need your guys' opinions and advice.

 

We share a lot of the same interests, morals and values- and I was telling him that I had never been in a serious relationship before and what I wanted in a relationship, and he completely understood to my surprise. I haven't sent him nudes or anything since it's against my own set of beliefs and such, and he understood that and respected me. We did have phone sex and he has sent me nudes. The really big things that are bothering me are that he lives across the U.S and the chances of either of us meeting each other is pretty slim, and I know that I'll get bored of it all eventually. Yet, I still want to give this all a try and see where we end up, because he really does mean a lot and I don't want to miss out on someone like him. The other big thing that worries me is our age gap. I'm 18 going on 19 soon, and he's 31 going on 32. We're at different stages in our lives and I don't wanna feel like a little kid to him and I don't want him to feel like he's an old hag compared to me (lol). Also, there's that fear of him using me to get his way like he did in his last fling, since younger women like myself can get manipulated by older guys without knowing it- and I really don't want to be another hit and run kind of girl to him. There's also the fact he told me he loved me while we were on a break, and I hope he wasn't just tossing that phrase around like it's a hello or something- I figure for his age he'd know when the right time to use that word would be lol. So far, he hasn't said anything to me personally that he had said to his ex, and he hasn't pressured me to do anything I wasn't comfortable with which is nice. He doesn't act hella creepy and weird when he talks about me like I'm some sex object, and he isn't a sex freak either. To note: when he first asked to get together with me around Xmas 2015, he didn't know my age, and we weren't doing anything at that time. With this all said, anything sexual we've done was done after my 18th birthday. So far throughout all of this, he's meant well and hasn't acted like a pervert towards me and stuff. I really like him as a friend and I can see us becoming an item and we're both legal adults, but with the above issues listed I can't come to a conclusion on what I want to happen. Sorry this is so long, but it's been bottled up for so long and I can't turn to anyone that I know without begin questioned like hell about who the guy is. If any of you have some advice that would be greatly appreciated! Thank you!

 

Paragraphs, will make your post easier to read and help you to get more responses.

[Chris516]

Hi everyone! I'm not one to seek advice on relationships, especially on such a wide platform- but I need some insight from different people on my situation here.

That is perfectly fine.

To start, I'm 19 years old and living in Arizona. I'd say I'm pretty smart and cautious with how I handle obstacles that come in my way. I've never been in any serious relationship and I'm not in any rush to date a guy. As far as casual dates go, I've usually been the one to break things off with guys because at the times I've been asked, relationships weren't on my mind and I needed to prioritize my time with school and stuff. I'm still a virgin and I'm not interested in the current hookup culture. With all this said, here's what I'm dealing with currently:

There's a guy I've been talking to online who has some notoriety to his name (I won't release info for his sake). We met through twitter because of how I'd reply to his tweets with some wit and humor to them, which resulted in him messaging me. Safe to say that we clicked pretty quickly and we talked pretty often. It got to where we were talking so much that we exchanged Skypes and other social media accs and we'd talk on multiple platforms almost everyday.

Ok

The first time we started video chatting was in November 2015 and I was so nervous, but once we started talking things went beautifully. He's really genuine, kind-hearted, well spoken & has an amazing sense of humor that's caught my heart for nearly 3 years now. We were talking as friends for awhile and then things started to escalate around Christmas. We started to call each other pet names and we'd made a conscious effort to keep in touch as much as we could and for as long as we could. He'd make efforts to respond to my tweets and comments before anyone else's and I've received some backlash from it (not that it bothers me but just to note). When we would Skype he'd always have something nice to say about my looks, and in return I'd usually tell him something similar. I've been told I flirt naturally and without knowing I'm doing so, which might be a reason why things started to get more romantic. Christmas Day comes along and he says he really likes me and wants to know if I'd want to pursue anything serious with him, and I was shocked. Part of me wanted to act on my thoughts and say yes immediately, but I felt like it would be weird since I've never actually met him in person before. Also long distance relationships are a pain in the ass and I didn't want to stress myself out with another responsibility. I told him no and he was understanding- he looked a little visibly upset, but nevertheless understanding of my circumstances. Then a few months roll around in 2016 and we share the same birth month. Since our talk during the holidays I started to consider his offer on being his girlfriend, I mean why not right? I was gonna be free for the summer and I could spend more time with him and possibly meet him. So then the night before his birthday comes and I tell him that I've been thinking about us being an item and I tell him that I'm open to the idea. His face brightens up immediately and he tells me that that was the best news he got all day etc. and i wish him a happy birthday and stuff. Then two weeks later it's the day after my birthday, and that's when he tells me he's falling in love with me. I was infatuated by him and i told him that I loved him a lot and he meant so much to me and stuff. We became a thing for a few months (not officially or publicly though, but a few of our friends knew about us). This continued throughout the summer of 2016 into November when I found out that his previous two relationships failed because of him. I was passed some info from a "friend" of his (says a lot about the people he surrounds himself with eh?) and they were private messages that admitted that he was using his ex for her body and that he's not actually interested in her.

While it isn't good, what he apparently did in previous relationships. It doesn't mean that you will fall in that category. You haven't physically met yet.

Although the information was from a few years prior to us talking, I still had some fear about being used in the same way. My first instinct was to talk to him about the leaked info and how ****ed up he was, but I was too afraid to argue with him because I didn't want to lose him. Instead I called him up on skype and we had a normal conversation until I asked him about his previous relationships. I figured this is important info to know in case I really am getting into something bad here with this guy. He told me that he hadn't been in a serious relationship for many years, but that he didn't want to be in a relationship again until he and I started talking. I told him that I needed to take a break and gather my thoughts about us, and I was already at a low point in my life so taking a break was very much needed anyway. He wasn't taking my words too kindly, but ultimately said that was fine with him and we went about our days.

Trust is an obvious problem.

Up until a week ago in 2017, we weren't talking at all- at least I wasn't talking to him. He'd send a message a few times a week until New Years when he said he loved me and hoped that I would come back to him and stuff. I felt a little guilty in the sense that I didn't want to seem like I was leading him on or anything, but there were things that I needed to consider about the both of us and our lifestyles and I'm still considering those things currently.

Like?

A week ago, however, I started a conversation with him and he replied a few hours late (no biggie though, his schedule is pretty hectic to begin with), and I asked him if he still wanted to become a couple, and he said he wants to be official, but he told me that he was having a hard time trusting me during our break and that he didn't want to be heartbroken again like what had happened to him several years ago. I told him that it would be a good idea to think about it some more and come back to me with a confident answer. He asked me if I had come to a conclusion about what we should do, and I told him that there were many different aspects to look at when it came to what we were doing, and that I wasn't too sure if I was ready to pursue anything further, but if he was willing to go further then I would try it out. Since then he hasn't wrote back yet and I don't know how else to go about this. This is where I need your guys' opinions and advice.

Like I mentioned before, trust is a major issue for both of you.

We share a lot of the same interests, morals and values- and I was telling him that I had never been in a serious relationship before and what I wanted in a relationship, and he completely understood to my surprise. I haven't sent him nudes or anything since it's against my own set of beliefs and such, and he understood that and respected me. We did have phone sex and he has sent me nudes. The really big things that are bothering me are that he lives across the U.S and the chances of either of us meeting each other is pretty slim, and I know that I'll get bored of it all eventually. Yet, I still want to give this all a try and see where we end up, because he really does mean a lot and I don't want to miss out on someone like him. The other big thing that worries me is our age gap. I'm 18 going on 19 soon, and he's 31 going on 32. We're at different stages in our lives and I don't wanna feel like a little kid to him and I don't want him to feel like he's an old hag compared to me (lol). Also, there's that fear of him using me to get his way like he did in his last fling, since younger women like myself can get manipulated by older guys without knowing it- and I really don't want to be another hit and run kind of girl to him. There's also the fact he told me he loved me while we were on a break, and I hope he wasn't just tossing that phrase around like it's a hello or something- I figure for his age he'd know when the right time to use that word would be lol. So far, he hasn't said anything to me personally that he had said to his ex, and he hasn't pressured me to do anything I wasn't comfortable with which is nice. He doesn't act hella creepy and weird when he talks about me like I'm some sex object, and he isn't a sex freak either. To note: when he first asked to get together with me around Xmas 2015, he didn't know my age, and we weren't doing anything at that time. With this all said, anything sexual we've done was done after my 18th birthday. So far throughout all of this, he's meant well and hasn't acted like a pervert towards me and stuff. I really like him as a friend and I can see us becoming an item and we're both legal adults, but with the above issues listed I can't come to a conclusion on what I want to happen. Sorry this is so long, but it's been bottled up for so long and I can't turn to anyone that I know without begin questioned like hell about who the guy is. If any of you have some advice that would be greatly appreciated! Thank you!

Stick to Skype for now.

[justwhoiam]

32 to your 19 is a red flag, and you're wise to be concerned about that. It's a significant gap and more than a little odd that a man at his age was pursuing a teenager. I don't mean that as any disrespect to you, OP, as you come across as articulate and intelligent...but it says something about him. I would be wondering why he isn't aiming closer to his own age.

Understandably, it might raise some red flags. And although many cases might be creepy, some real ones do work. I know of one case where she was 17 and he was 20 years older. They got married after around 5 years, and are still married to this day, with him being over 90.

 

In this case, I'd think he talks to a lot of "followers", and you, OP, might be just one of the very many.

[codest]

OP: If you have the patience, you may want to read my post in its entirety (it's longer than yours, just be aware):

 

http://www.loveshack.org/forums/romantic/dating/617752-anna-things-unsaid

 

Just to see how things can go in such situations. That might help you in some ways.

[Chris516]

This was difficult to read without paragraph breaks, but I think I got the gist of it.

 

It's long distance, you're a naive 19yo (nothing wrong with that) and he's 31 and has a reputation of sorts, his mates don't recommend him as a partner and he's got some "notoriety" to his name.

 

All my alarm bells are ringing. What exactly does his notoriety involve? What do your parents and friends say about this? I have a daughter your age and my attitude about dating is fairly relaxed....but I'd be having kittens if my daughter was doing what you are.

I am the same age as you. My daughter will be 21 this year. I would be fuming mad. Yes, It is her life. But, Save the 10+yr. age difference after maturing a lot more.

 

The biggest age difference of any woman I was in a relationship with, who was older than me, was 9mos., younger was 1yr. 4mos. so far. I personally don't like being in relationships of more than five years. I was interested in one woman who is 14yrs. younger than me. But I knew it wouldn't have worked.

 

The age difference between my father(75) n' his fourth wife(68) is 7yrs.; The age between my (ex)father-in-law(78) and his second wife(64) is 14yrs.

 

Save the monstrous age gaps for your(OP) later years.

Edited March 24, 2017 by Chris516