Untamed21 Posted March 8, 2017 Share Posted March 8, 2017 So I am still friends with a lot of my ex work colleagues and even though I don't speak to some people I am still quite friendly with them. Yesterday night, one of them blocked me on facebook. To be fair, he's a highly opinionated person and I didn't have anything in common with him other than some work discussions and things - I'm a feminist and he's definitely not so I was wondering if it could have been the woman's day posts on my wall. He still works with my boyfriend and everything was fine until last night. This morning I woke up to discover he had blocked me. I couldn't really think of anything I had done to affront him so, or to offend him, so I was just really confused as to why he blocked me to start with? My boyfriend says this seems like a very him sort of thing to do if he doesn't agree with what someone posts. He's a really nice man if a bit opinionated and I can't think of what I have done to offend him into blocking me? Am I overreacting? Should I talk to him? This is just really affecting my anxiety and making me believe that everyone hates me and I've recently lost two friends from the same friends circle so I don't know if this is my anxiety catastrophising something really trivial or I have a right to be this upset over something like this from an ex colleague. Link to post Share on other sites
Erik30 Posted March 8, 2017 Share Posted March 8, 2017 Yeah you are overreacting a bit. You care way too much. If this is basically just an acquaintance, how would you even notice this soon that he blocked you? No you don't have to talk to him. It's his problem, you've done nothing wrong. It also seems really extreme to block you because of some posts about women's day. He could've just hidden you if It annoyed him that much. You don't have a lot in common anyway so just let it go. Focus on your real friends 2 Link to post Share on other sites
d0nnivain Posted March 8, 2017 Share Posted March 8, 2017 Yes, you are over reacting. No you should not talk to him about this. FB gives people windows into other's lives that they never had before. It was probably politically motivated. I'm sure he could still be professional & polite toward you on those occasions when you have to interact IRL. Stop worrying about the virtual world because it doesn't matter. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author Untamed21 Posted March 8, 2017 Author Share Posted March 8, 2017 (edited) I noticed because I picked up on the fact that I was missing a mutual with someone. And recently a lot of passive aggressive **** has been going on in my ex work social/friends circle and I am genuinely paranoid that I'm going to end up losing all my friends in the process. So when I noticed this, I panicked, then realised who it was and was really confused. You're absolutely right by the way I do care way too much. I struggle with severe anxiety like I said and the logical part of me is fully aware that I'm reading too much into this and catastrophising, but the idea that someone hates/dislikes me really scares me for some reason. It's something I'm trying to work on, but have had a really hard 8-10 months recently and have properly spiraled. Edited March 8, 2017 by Untamed21 Link to post Share on other sites
elaine567 Posted March 8, 2017 Share Posted March 8, 2017 Maybe you haven't done anything, maybe his SO doesn't like him talking to other women on FB... 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Rockdad Posted March 8, 2017 Share Posted March 8, 2017 There may be a good reason. I blocked my employees on FB. They are good people and we get along famously. I did it to keep my personal and business world separated. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author Untamed21 Posted March 8, 2017 Author Share Posted March 8, 2017 I asked him point blank (before I read your responses I wish I had before I sent the message) and he's quite upfront, so he just told me it was nothing personal, that we just don't have anything in common and it's nothing I need to apologise for or anything. He said he was blocking everyone he had unfollowed. Somehow knowing it was not personal at all makes me feel a lot better. So I am definitely glad I asked. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
preraph Posted March 8, 2017 Share Posted March 8, 2017 Listen, this is the trouble with letting work people on your social media to begin with. You might have gotten along with him forever if you hadn't made him privy to your personal opinions and private life. If you want a social media with work people on it, then do a separate one just for work people and make it look professional and don't get personal on there. Second, I went in to my Twitter last year because I'd quit using it as it had become too cumbersome and blocked more than half of the people following me and stopped following most people. I wanted it concise and don't have all day to scroll down. It's that simple. It may have to do with you being unprofessional by letting this guy and other see your personal stuff, OR it may have zero to do with you. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Untamed21 Posted March 8, 2017 Author Share Posted March 8, 2017 Listen, this is the trouble with letting work people on your social media to begin with. You might have gotten along with him forever if you hadn't made him privy to your personal opinions and private life. If you want a social media with work people on it, then do a separate one just for work people and make it look professional and don't get personal on there. Second, I went in to my Twitter last year because I'd quit using it as it had become too cumbersome and blocked more than half of the people following me and stopped following most people. I wanted it concise and don't have all day to scroll down. It's that simple. It may have to do with you being unprofessional by letting this guy and other see your personal stuff, OR it may have zero to do with you. Ah everyone at our workplace are on social media with each other. It's not big deal where I used to work. And I rarely post on facebook anyway, my last post was 2 months ago. So it's not a big deal. But yeah, I asked him and he just said it had nothing to do with me, we just don't have anything in common and at the end of the day, to me thats an excellent reason to unfriend someone from social media. Link to post Share on other sites
VeveCakes Posted March 8, 2017 Share Posted March 8, 2017 Delete Facebook. Or get off it for a week or two. I'm sure you will make an excuse not to like everyone else under the sun but believe me - people survived before Facebook. This should not cause you such anguish. That is a huge sign you need to step away from social media. You noticed a mutual friend of someone wasn't showing? You are spending wayyyy too much time analyzing people's Facebook and their actions. Please consider a week or two hiatus from Facebook. I deleted mine and the weight and anxiety literally disappeared in a day. I never went back I just felt SO much better. No excuses as to why you can't give t up... everyone could. You are not in a mental state to be on social media if it is effecting you this way. 3 Link to post Share on other sites
preraph Posted March 8, 2017 Share Posted March 8, 2017 Ah everyone at our workplace are on social media with each other. It's not big deal where I used to work. And I rarely post on facebook anyway, my last post was 2 months ago. So it's not a big deal. But yeah, I asked him and he just said it had nothing to do with me, we just don't have anything in common and at the end of the day, to me thats an excellent reason to unfriend someone from social media. Unless your FB is dedicated to your work life, it is really not smart to put work people on there, for so many reasons. First of all, it perpetuates gossip. Stuff they'd never know otherwise. There's always someone at work who wants to make you look bad, and you're just helping them do it. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Untamed21 Posted March 8, 2017 Author Share Posted March 8, 2017 Delete Facebook. Or get off it for a week or two. I'm sure you will make an excuse not to like everyone else under the sun but believe me - people survived before Facebook. This should not cause you such anguish. That is a huge sign you need to step away from social media. You noticed a mutual friend of someone wasn't showing? You are spending wayyyy too much time analyzing people's Facebook and their actions. Please consider a week or two hiatus from Facebook. I deleted mine and the weight and anxiety literally disappeared in a day. I never went back I just felt SO much better. No excuses as to why you can't give t up... everyone could. You are not in a mental state to be on social media if it is effecting you this way. Unfortunately, because its tied to my new job, I cannot delete it, but I definitely can take a long, LONG break away from it and pass the page roles to someone else. So I think that is an excellent idea. I'm absolute not in the right mental state right now. I am confused about the world around me and struggling with a lot of emotional baggage. But I think a break away from facebook is a great idea and will help me with my emotional well being greatly, so thanks for the recommendation. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Purepony Posted March 8, 2017 Share Posted March 8, 2017 Hahaha anxiety over Facebook?!? You need a hobby and a role model Link to post Share on other sites
VeveCakes Posted March 8, 2017 Share Posted March 8, 2017 Hahaha anxiety over Facebook?!? You need a hobby and a role model So rude and not helpful. Facebook actually does cause a lot of anxiety and depression and people have no idea how it's affecting them. Maybe get educated before laughing at others. https://www.google.ca/amp/s/www.forbes.com/sites/amitchowdhry/2016/04/30/study-links-heavy-facebook-and-social-media-usage-to-depression/amp/ https://psychcentral.com/lib/the-anxiety-of-facebook/ 3 Link to post Share on other sites
Author Untamed21 Posted March 8, 2017 Author Share Posted March 8, 2017 Hahaha anxiety over Facebook?!? You need a hobby and a role model No, I said this was contributing to my anxiety. Also as the Vevecakes said, this is a genuine psychological issue for people who struggle with social anxiety. I am sure you have plenty of problems which may seem trivial to me too but o recognise empathy goes a long way. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
d0nnivain Posted March 8, 2017 Share Posted March 8, 2017 Good for you for knowing yourself. Anxiety can make even the smallest problems seem gargantuan. Glad he responded well to you inquiry & Gave you answer you can accept. Take a deep breath & get on with life. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
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