Anna17 Posted March 10, 2017 Share Posted March 10, 2017 Hi everyone. I'm have reached the bottom point of my life. We have been seperated for almost 10 months now. 2 and a half yrs married, 6 years together. We have a beautiful and healthy 2 year old wich i thank god every day for him. We never had a heslthy relationship. We use to fight all the time. Both controlling, both jealous of eachother.. We both have a big ego, his is a little out of normal. He has a drinking problem, everytime he was drunk he used fo physically and mentally abuse me, he is the biggest manipulator. I was only 19 when i met him.. Never experienced abuse in any way. I had bfs, which they all respected and made me feel lile i was the only women out there, but he was different. I lost my self esteem, i lost my good looks due to stress and depression. Forgot to take care of myself. I sufferes with anxiety and depression 2 yrs after being with him. Many on you might ask why did i stay.. I just couldnt see myself with out him, i was obsessed and very dependent on him. I used and still blame myself. I think he was right, everytime he mistreated me he had a reason to.... I had my son on 2014. Me and him completely grew apart. He never helped woth the baby, used to come home drunk, lost his job and He lost his dad last year, it was a very devastating time. On may 2016 we had the biggest argument, he started hitting and choking me. To protect myslef i pushed him away and scratched his face by accident..... Or so he says i cant remember hurting him in any way. I was just trying to push him... Long story short a week after this i got arrested.. He had filed a report for domestic violece.. It was the worst day of my life.. My marriage was over, mh record wasnt clear but most importantly i had to spend a nigjt away from my baby.. The next day i found myself wothout an apartment and i had no financial support to afford anything... It took me two month to get on my feet.. Got a job and an apartment for me and my son. I never got an apology from, he made me believe i desrved to get arrested because i wasnt there to support him when his father died, all i did is fougjt him.. Its been almost 10 months and i cant get to get completely over him and over what happened. Im very depressed and all whats keeping me sane is my son.. I dont know what to do with my like. I have no self esteem and no self respect. I feel like a failure for getting a dicorce, i ceel like a loser for having a bad record.. What am i supposed to tell my son when he grows up. What am i supposed to tell myself to move on and find a litrle light at the end of this miserable tunnel.. Thank you for taking your time reading this! Link to post Share on other sites
mikeylo Posted March 10, 2017 Share Posted March 10, 2017 So he played the victim. Can't undo it but what you now need to do is, get a divorce. You need it asap before he sucks you back somehow.He will try. You are not a failure.You are a victim but dont get stuck in the victim role. GEt some therapy.It will help to overcome all the negativity. As for your son.As long as you are a good mother, he will understand everything. Take Care. Link to post Share on other sites
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