mac007 Posted July 25, 2005 Share Posted July 25, 2005 I justed started a new job. This female employee was really cool with me in the beginning. we were joking around. But, in the break room. She had some bite size pizza. I said, "Can I have one?" She said, "Yeah." Then she said, "Not that one." Then she said to me, "I am mad." It seemed like she was joking at the time. But the demenor of her attitude has changed. Nothing mean. It just that she doesn't smile at me anymore, nor asked me how I am doing. I am concerned because She really is a good person. And she may be going through a hard time right now. I just talk to her about work, briefly about 1 every 2 weeks. It is just she doesn't ask me how I am doing. nor smiles. She said it is OK that I am talking to her about work. She seems real cool to talk about work. But that is all there is to it. I don't like her as GF material. I could ignore her. But then she would think that I am just another guy-jerk. Any ideas to make this work? A girl is more attractive who smiles but this one has lost her smile. Maybe, she doesn't smile anymore with me. But, hopefully something will change. Link to post Share on other sites
curiousnycgirl Posted July 26, 2005 Share Posted July 26, 2005 Is there any reason you can't ask her if everything is ok? You can tell her she has seemed less happy of late, and ask if there is anything you can do to help. Other than that, there really isn't much you can do. Link to post Share on other sites
mac007 Posted July 26, 2005 Share Posted July 26, 2005 I can but all she will say is probably nothing is wrong. I asked her how was her fourth of july weekend. she said it was fine. and that was it. Just by the tone of her voice. I didn't want to follow up. I talk to other employees at work, and she knows I do. I get along with everybody great. I will probably say sorry for taking some of your pizza. Sounds so stupid for me to say sorry about that. And stupid for her not to talk to me because of that. Link to post Share on other sites
curiousnycgirl Posted July 26, 2005 Share Posted July 26, 2005 hmmm I would follow up with, well you don't seem to be as happy/friendly as you were when we first met, was it something I did? Something I said? If so I am quite sorry. To be honest if it's really all about pizza - I agree it's absurd and I would tread very carefully around her. Link to post Share on other sites
mac007 Posted July 26, 2005 Share Posted July 26, 2005 That is good advice. what you said about the hmm..... I would like to say it like that, but I don't want it to suggest anything else. would that be a put down if I asked her that? Link to post Share on other sites
Merin Posted July 26, 2005 Share Posted July 26, 2005 Don't mess with her food and you'll be okay! JK JK JK My guess is she had something going on in her personal life and wasn't having a good day... BUT there is actually a thread started by DevilDog regarding other employee's asking for his lunch and how aggravating it is.. So for real maybe it was about the pizza... Regardless, ask her if she's upset with you for any reason or if you have offended her, the only person who knows for sure is her. Good Luck Link to post Share on other sites
mac007 Posted July 26, 2005 Share Posted July 26, 2005 Thanks. I guess not. Even especially after someone ask you if you want some. Link to post Share on other sites
XNemesisX Posted July 26, 2005 Share Posted July 26, 2005 Well as long as you don't inhale all the coworkers food then I don't see the problem One little pizza bite is no biggie...I doubt that is what it was. It sounds like she is having personal problems OR she just really HATES that job and is miserable to be there. Ask her if everything is okay like the other posters suggested. If she still doesn't want to talk about it, then don't push it. Does she act this way with the other coworkers also or is it just you? Link to post Share on other sites
mac007 Posted July 26, 2005 Share Posted July 26, 2005 Maybe just me. But then I don't see interact with other co-workers as much. She is in her litter circle of friends of 3. It is a large size firm. Link to post Share on other sites
Lil Honey Posted July 26, 2005 Share Posted July 26, 2005 Originally posted by mac007 I justed started a new job. This female employee was really cool with me in the beginning. we were joking around. I just talk to her about work, briefly about 1 every 2 weeks. It is just she doesn't ask me how I am doing. nor smiles. She said it is OK that I am talking to her about work. She seems real cool to talk about work. But that is all there is to it. I don't like her as GF material. BUT, maybe she sees YOU as boyfriend material. Maybe when the two of you started being friendly, she felt it developing further. IF she is involved with someone else, she may be finding that those close/friendly feelings for you could take her down the wrong road, so she is determined to talk only business, that way it can't get friendlier or more personal. Link to post Share on other sites
loony Posted July 26, 2005 Share Posted July 26, 2005 I'm not sure why you're worried about her not smiling at you anymore... Link to post Share on other sites
mac007 Posted July 26, 2005 Share Posted July 26, 2005 Okay, I took everybodies advice. I was talking with her about work on the phone. Apologizing because I don't understand the process. She was really cool with me on the phone, strictly business. Then I said, "Oh by the way, you know, it going to sound silly. But that one day, I took some pizza from you and you said that you were mad at me." Well, I am sorry. She said, "don't worry about it. it no big deal, really." Then I said to her, sometimes I can be a jerk." She reassured me everything is OK. So, thanks again. If she sees me bf material, then I better stop what I am doing to make her think that. Link to post Share on other sites
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