wisconsinfool Posted July 27, 2005 Share Posted July 27, 2005 I'll try to make this as short as possible to save you guys some reading time. Anyways, there is a girl I've been "with" for the last month or so, not technically seeing each other but it was starting to get pretty serious. I always talked about her with one of my good guy friends, I told him how I was going to start going out with her eventually. Anyways, someone had a house party and both me, her, and my good friend were there. I had one too many drinks and eventually ended up falling asleep in an upstairs spare bedroom. I woke up the next morning, me and her had breakfast and everything seemed normal. A week later (tonight), she phoned me crying and told me she had to admit something. Apparently, while I was passed out she had sex with my friend. I dont know who to be more mad at, him or her. He knew how much I liked her. She feels horrible about it and is practically begging me to forgive her. I want to forgive her, but I really don't see things ever being the same between us after that. Maybe I'm just not thinking straight right now, but I can't decide what to do. I don't know whether to take her back and TRY to start trusting her again, or to just say forget it and move on. Link to post Share on other sites
smile Posted July 27, 2005 Share Posted July 27, 2005 I say if you have a mind to forgive your male friend who knew how you felt about her then she definitely deserves to be forgiven. She had hung out with you , but like you said you weren't going out, nothing exclusive. After it happened she decided she liked you right? At least she told you and didn't keep it a secret you wound up finding out a couple years later when you are deep in the relationship. She should get points for comming clean. And why didn't this friend of yours confess? I say if you really like her give her a chance. She seems sorry for what she did and cares about you enough to tell you so. It may never be the same again between you two but begining a relationship was going to change everything anyway... sometimes life takes strange turns. If you care about her go with it.. never let pride make your decisions when it comes to love. Link to post Share on other sites
Sal Paradise Posted July 27, 2005 Share Posted July 27, 2005 You shouldn't forgive either of them. She is a slut and he is a piece of ****. But let's say you do forgive her (which you shouldn't) that friend of yours can't remain a part of either of your lives. She can have zero contact with him. And neither should you. Personally I think you should just move on before she hurts you even worse. You guys have only been together (or whatever it is you two are, since you say you weren't seeing her) and she already has the wandering eye. If you can't trust her in the first month how can you trust her after 6-12 months, or even 5 years? What is she going to do when the puppy love phase ends? She not only slept around on you, she did it with a so called friend (if he was a real friend he wouldn't of done it) of yours. Maybe next time she'll do it with a member of your family! Anyways I suggest moving on. Find a new girl and a new friend. Link to post Share on other sites
erika2610 Posted July 27, 2005 Share Posted July 27, 2005 Originally posted by Sal Paradise You shouldn't forgive either of them. She is a slut and he is a piece of ****. I think that's a little harsh. They weren't exclusive.. and it sounds like she felt really bad about it. I say give her another chance. People make mistakes. If she didn't care, she wouldn't have told ya. Link to post Share on other sites
aares Posted July 27, 2005 Share Posted July 27, 2005 I agree she is a slut. It doesnt matter if you two were "exclusive" or not...she knew you liked her and even though it was starting to get serious, she f***ed one of your good "friends". "Oh, I am so sorry" she says to you. This is when you say, "well, slut, you should have thought about that before you f***ed a good friend of mine". "Oh man I was drunk I really cant remember anything" your friend says to you. This is when you say, "look you little b1tch I dont care get out of my face before I mollywhop you". Most likely since you question if things will ever be the same with you two now, it wont ever be the same. You will always remember what she did to you. Cut your losses if you have any, proceed onward without him or her. Link to post Share on other sites
mixwell Posted July 27, 2005 Share Posted July 27, 2005 yeah go ahead and take her back if you want your friends sloppy left overs.. seriously man. even tho you werent exclusive she shouldnt have slept with him and yer friend shouldnt have nailed her.. If he knew you liked her thats messed up.. basically you two were something, even tho not official.. and there is no way you and her and your "friend" could hang out together knowing what has happened.. and its only been a month.. i would say ditch her and move on.. if you were with her for a long time then maybe.. but most likely i would say the same.. I mean yeah she came clean but she still did the act.. And i know if you take her back you are going to think about it all the time.. everytime you see her and everytime you see yer friend that is going to pop into your head.. why didnt she find you at the party and screw you ?? Unless she does see the two of you as an item.. she sounds sleazy man.. I would get out of there before it gets any deeper into a relationship. .thats my advice.. seriously have some dignity and self worth.. you dont deserve some sleaze that bangs your friend when you arent around.. its your call.. keep us updated.. Link to post Share on other sites
mixwell Posted July 27, 2005 Share Posted July 27, 2005 Originally posted by erika2610 Originally posted by Sal Paradise You shouldn't forgive either of them. She is a slut and he is a piece of ****. I think that's a little harsh. They weren't exclusive.. and it sounds like she felt really bad about it. I say give her another chance. People make mistakes. If she didn't care, she wouldn't have told ya. oh but its not harsh that she let his good friend nail her when he wasnt around ?? cmon now.... Link to post Share on other sites
ReluctantRomeo Posted July 27, 2005 Share Posted July 27, 2005 Originally posted by smile At least she told you and didn't keep it a secret you wound up finding out a couple years later when you are deep in the relationship. She should get points for comming clean. And why didn't this friend of yours confess? Exactly. I wouldn't trust them together though. Not for the time being, at least. Link to post Share on other sites
BLF04 Posted July 27, 2005 Share Posted July 27, 2005 I would say hit that sh*t for a little while, then kick that b*tch to the curb. OR If you do get back together, don't put much of an emotional investment in it for a while. Link to post Share on other sites
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