The kids after separation

[The_Onceler]

It's unbelievable. It just blows me away how they can lie and manipulate. Then if things do not go their way, they tell everyone we are being the jerk.

 

Yes. I am not a saint, but I have been surprised at the ease with which she will lie and manipulate. As an adult, I don't always expect 100% honesty from people. That said, I have been stunned by her behavior. To argue at length about how much she wants to see the kids, and how much they want and NEED to see her, all the while, the reason that they are not with her is because she decided she would rather spend a day or two alone at home with her boyfriend.

 

I could maybe understand that she doesn't want me to know her business. OK. So she might lie and say she has to work when really she wants to spend time with him. And I can understand that she doesn't want me to know that she is choosing to be with him instead of the kids. I can't understand that she would want that, but I can understand that she would not want me to know it. But to then build upon both of those and go so far as to accuse me of keeping the kids from her - it seems nearly pathological.

 

 

She responds with another lie trying to cover herself. I ignored her and never responded back. I don't regret sending her the text. Will it make a difference? Probably not, but at least she knows I don't eat her BS.

 

Wow - you are definitely more level headed than I am. Good for you. I'd had a similar exchange when she first had my kids meet with the other man and his kids. I really can't prevent her doing what she wants along those lines, but I think it is harmful to the kids at this stage of the game. Also, since the other man is likely to be gone inside a year, it will just pile on the kids, who are already struggling to deal with all of the recent changes.

 

It sounds as if you are learning faster than I have, but I am on the same page with you there: assume that she is as likely to lie as not, and proceed accordingly.