Different religion relationship

[Sandy]

Does anyone else live in one of these??

 

If so what religions, and how do you find the relationship - what problems do you have, and how do you overcome them??

[Tony T]

The greatest number of people who are in relationships or who are married come from different religious backgrounds and training.

 

Religious differences shouldn't make a big difference until you start talking marriage. And if you aren't open minded enough to accept each other's spiritual orientations, you are certainly not fit for marriage.

 

Of course, there are a few religions that are very strict and rigid. It is here that you have to use special care in your handling of the relationship.

 

The only people who will have problems with this are religious finatics, those who are closed minded, etc. Those sorts of people will have other serious problems in a marriage as well. Avoid them like the plague.

 

A couple should be able to respect each other's highly personal religious beliefs. As people grow older, those often change as they see more of the world. These changes must be respected as well.

 

The only matter worthy of serious thought is religious upbringing of children. Sane, open-minded, non-finatic, non-hypocrite persons will want their children exposed to different religious thought and training, preparing them to make their own decisions as to their spiritual path when that time comes.

 

If either or both parties in a relationship where there are different religious involved are religious nuts, there will be problems. But a relationship like that won't be fun either so there's not really any point in continuing it.

 

Mature, open-minded, rational people are always able to coexist with other people who have different views than them and actually grow from the experience. When two people are copies of each other, a relationship can become stagnant.

 

Relationships really don't have to have problems. People create them because they just can't handle sanity. Any person who is steadfast and fixed in their spirituality is already doomed because the nature of life and of God is growth. Even God changes His/Her beliefs all the time. Sometimes God feels good about floods...and then switches over to droughts. Check out the Mississippi River.

 

Have a great relationship and don't make religion such a big deal. Believe what you believe and respect each other for that. A greater love can come from that.

[Tony T]

You did such a great job with all the other posts...I am truly grateful and I don't feel so alone anymore. Now, what is it about religion? I was very eager to hear your views on this one. Come on, don't be shy!!!

 

This religious question is always a sticky one for people...I don't know why. Actually, I was hoping you could help me understand it better as well.

[Rogue]

I'm not in a relationship with someone from a diffirent religion, but I know quite a few people that are.

 

To be honest, most problems (if any at all) surface after marriage, ussually when the first child is born. That is when religious diffirences really come out.

 

It's not a question of love or respect or maturity. The real issue is how exactly should the child be raised? Which religion should the child be raised in? You see, you can't raise a child under two religions like you can raise him under two cultures. Often times, religious teachings contradict each other, so you cannot have one parent tell the child one thing, while the other parent simply disagrees.

 

Most truly devout religious adults do not try to force their views on their spouses. If they did that, they'd spend all their time arguing. But with children, they feel the responsibility to raise the child properly. They want their child to be have morals, to know right from wrong. If both parents have conflicting views of what the truth is, then there is a little bit of friction.

 

But most of the people I know in cross-religious marriages/relationships are no diffirent than anyone else. They seem to have the same ups and downs as any other relationship. Hope this helps, Sandy.

[sparkle]

I've met many people who are dating or married to someone of a different religion. And I've seen many instances where everything worked out great, as well as some cases where this issue led to breakups.

 

It's easy to say that religion shouldn't matter in a relationship. But it all depends on how important you consider your religion to be. And for many people, their religion may be the most important thing to them, and could be a way of life for them. For others, it may be just a religion they were born and raised in, yet they don't practice it regularly.

 

If you're in a relationship with someone of a different faith, I suggest the first thing you do is become informed about his religion. This way, you'll get an idea of what the religion is about, how important it is to him, and what to expect. This is something you want to do early on, sit down and have a nice long talk about each other's religions. You want to find out as much information as you can and then decide if you can date someone that believes in his certain beliefs.

 

Why is this important, and why should you find this out soon? Because this has to do with acceptance. You have to be able to accept this person and accept the fact that he has his own beliefs. You have to accept the fact that these may not be the same as yours, and in some cases, may be completely different. Then once you have this information, think about it.

 

Can you accept and tolerate the fact that this person has different beliefs than yours? If you can't, then this relationship is NOT for you.

 

Can you see his religion as something that is just DIFFERENT than yours, but NOT better or worse than yours? Can you realize that neither one is practicing a better religion or the "true" religion, but just a different one? Again, if you can't do this, then now is the time to get out of it.

 

Now, if you consider this relationship to be important to you and are willing to make it work out, there are ways to work around these differences. I think a relationship with two people from different religions will work out just like any other, good or bad. In every relationship, people will have differences. Although some may be minor differences and conflicts of opinions, many relationships may involve major ones such as race, faith, etc. And it all boils down to one thing:

 

WILLINGNESS TO COMPROMISE.

 

With a lot of effort and a willingness to compromise from BOTH partners, they can overcome this obstacle and move along into a wonderful relationship.

 

(to be continued)

 

*****************

 

I have a lot more to say on this especially about the problems and overcoming them, and I'd love to keep writing, but I just came home from a long day. Dead tired. Need sleep. So I will continue this tomorrow. Please check back!

 

Thanks!