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Hating the dumper to get better?


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MeadowFlower
It's over, it truly is over, and for ever.

I just saw that this was posted here, but I was supposed to post it in the 'How are you coping today?' thread. Actually I think the mods moved it here??

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I just saw that this was posted here, but I was supposed to post it in the 'How are you coping today?' thread. Actually I think the mods moved it here??

 

I think so. Sorry for the confusion.

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So my ex dump me a few months ago and didn't really help me move on and provide me closure. She block me, and today I saw her, want to be civil so I said hi. She responded, but is still cold towards me, I was wondering why she is doing that? If someone is cold I should be the one, but her behavior made me feel really bad about myself and I don't know what to do. It's really hard, I tried to move on, but sometimes things like this involving her still comes back to haunt me and i'm in pain.

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So my ex dump me a few months ago and didn't really help me move on and provide me closure. She block me, and today I saw her, want to be civil so I said hi. She responded, but is still cold towards me, I was wondering why she is doing that? If someone is cold I should be the one, but her behavior made me feel really bad about myself and I don't know what to do. It's really hard, I tried to move on, but sometimes things like this involving her still comes back to haunt me and i'm in pain.

 

She isn't obligated to help you move on. Closure comes from within.

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ExpatInItaly
So my ex dump me a few months ago and didn't really help me move on and provide me closure. She block me, and today I saw her, want to be civil so I said hi. She responded, but is still cold towards me, I was wondering why she is doing that? If someone is cold I should be the one, but her behavior made me feel really bad about myself and I don't know what to do. It's really hard, I tried to move on, but sometimes things like this involving her still comes back to haunt me and i'm in pain.

 

It's not an ex's job to help you move on. Closure also comes from inside you, not from an ex. It sounds cliche, but it's true. She doesn't owe you anything anymore, I'm afraid.

 

She is being cold because she knows you still want her, and she doesn't want to give you false hope. She probably is also trying to respect her new boyfriend by not interacting with you, because she knows if she did, you would probably misinterpret her kindness as renewed interest.

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