Girlfriend has been under a lot of stress lately; called for a break. Help!

[confusedguy100]

Ill keep this short and direct.

 

My girlfriend has been under a lot of stress lately, final exams, visiting me, getting a job and pressure from her family.

 

3 days ago she asked for a 2 week no contact period while she sorts out all of the above.

 

Prior to this happening i was very worried that she wasn't coming to visit me as the days are nearing and i think it was the breaking point as the moment i mentioned it she wanted to call about taking a break.

 

Its come as a shock to me because we have had our flaws but we always talk about them and improve and I've been overcoming some clingy behaviour myself.

 

I should mention that she was supposed to come to my country for a short amount of time to work which made her want to exit the relationship, i told her eventually that look you don't have to come its fine and our relationship went back to normal

 

My question is do i stand a chance of losing her? Is this the beginning of the end

[GemmaUK]

Explain your clingy behaviour please?

it kinda sounds like you could have been behaving clingy recently whilst she has a lot on her plate.

Are you undergoing therapy to help with this behaviour?

 

Also, I assume you're sticking to her request for no contact?

[confusedguy100]

i completely agree i was clingy/annoying her while she had a lot of stress going on... i wasn't contacting her the previous weekend as i was fishing and didn't have service, maybe she was liking the no contact part for her studying?

 

I use to wait for her texts

 

I still get upset when she doesnt miss me after being absent for days

 

I still get upset when she cant decide on when she is going to visit me if it ever will happen

 

Im not ready to talk to therapists, i think my situation could be handled through just talking it out..

 

I'm literally dying to talk to her, so much is going through my head like does she want to end things, has she found someone else, has she got cold feet, is she not ready to commit etc

Edited April 1, 2017 by confusedguy100

[ExpatInItaly]

How far apart are you?

 

If she wanted to end the relationship rather than try to close the distance by working in your country (or vice versa), then the relationship won't survive. How could it? One of you would need to be willing to move, and apparently, she's not interested in doing so.

 

How long have you been dating, and how often do you see each other in person?

[confusedguy100]

Over 10000miles apart.

 

I've been the one to say I'll move but it's worried me she can't tell me if she's ever going to come here for a month holiday before starting her new job. It's important for me because I've been there 5 times to her 1 time and I feel like I'm doing all the work

 

2 years and every 3-6 months I visit her for a 3 week or more period

[Blackbird0121]

You should give her the 2 weeks, and then you can start communicating with each other. Of course you miss her, that's how it is supposed to be when you are in a relationship! The question is whether she will miss you. People deal with stress in different ways - you may want to vent to her about it, but it seems like she needs to take her distance and deal with things herself.

 

Once you re-establish communication, you need to have a serious conversation with her about you relationship. You need to be honest with her, and she needs to do the same for you.

 

Good luck!

[smackie9]

Que sera, sera

Whatever will be, will be

The future's not ours to see

Que sera, sera

What will be, will be