!! I don't know what I should do!

[sofff]

Hi everyone, I am in desperate need for help. I really really like this guy, no one has ever made me feel this way. We are both seniors in college and we are going back to our countries in june. We first met in September. I noticed that he was staring at me a LOT. He would smile to me and even blush, fidget...etc. We talked once after the quarter ended after I asked him to help me with something.

 

We ended up talking 2 hours after class, mostly him sharing personal things about his life and was not afraid to share the ugly things. He opened up to mr very easily. We chatted a little over winter break. But I am the one who always initiates, later I realized that he took a trip to canada with a girl he knew way before me from the same country he is from, but she goes to college in another state. I obviously felt really bad about it.

 

Next quarter we would always bump into each other. Sometimes but rarely we would have casual talk but never anything deep. I asked him to study together for our final and he said yes. After that he asked me if we could meet the next day to continue reviewing. He also asked me if I was continuing the class we were in the following quarter. During our study sessions, there was this super intense energy and he would stare deep into my eyes and he always played with his hair, sometimes he would blush, he would joke a little. The second review day, he told me he had a rough night and was tired, so at one point he told me he needed to lay down a little bit and I was sitting very close to him (his head faces my legs).

 

A few minutes later we started studying again but he stayed in the same position so when i talked to him I was literally looking down and he would stare at me in the same way described before. But all and all, I was very confused by the whole nap situation...

After we took that final that we reviewed for, he came to talk to me (but maybe I was just in his way) and walked with me to my bus stop, he gave me a quick hug and said see you next quarter.

 

Whenever I ask him for a favor he helps me, he replies to my texts, he looks at me in an interesting way. I would say intensely but I don't know since I like him so much. He never talks loud but mumbles.

 

This quarter We had a brief conversation online. We were planning on meeting but he said he couldn't and cancelled twice in one day, but somehow we bumped into each other and it was very awkward, quick, and he was standing super close to me as if he was expecting me to hug him or smg but he never made the move (he is much much taller than me) and was stading very tall and stiff with bith his hands in his pockets. I didn't want to come off as clingy as I am always the one who initiates contact anyways, at least online for different reasons. Yesterday we were in class, he did not sit next to me although I always smile at him and say hi.

 

He sat next to 2 guys. Also he might have looked at me twice or three times, but not like before. After class, he just rushed out of the class even if I expected him to wait for me and catch up on spring break, which he also spent a few days with that same girl. I dont know if there is anything between them, but I cant ignore the energy between us. It is very intense yo the point that I am not even sure if he likes me or just straight up hates me...

FYI if I know for sure that he is not single, I will just let go even if it is going to very painful but I just want to know what is going through his mind or if I am just straight up overthinking this whole thing.

 

Am I too crazy to think that this guy might be interested in me? Maybe he was interested but not anymore? He never initiates but when I do he responds.

 

How come sometimes he hugs me/talks to me one on one but the next day he literally rushes out of class and never make a time to talk to me or just ignores me? Am I the confusing one in this case? We have "known" each other aince september, I am thinking it is enough time to know someone. Even if he might be a shy person I am pretty sure that I showed him that I am very open towarda him, even if I am genuinely shy and reserved whereas he is open to other people buy nervous/awkward towards me. Am I bothering him/too clingy? Maybe he doesnt initiate anything because we are both from different countries? What is going on?

 

Please somebody help me! This is stressing me out so much because I really really like him and no one has ever made me feel this way. He is super sweet and very helpful whenever I ask him for help it's just that his behavior is so unpredictable that I don't know what to think..

 

Thank you so so much for taking the time to read my rambles and I apologize for any typos!!

Edited April 8, 2017 by a LoveShack.org Moderator

[Flowerchildfala]

I would stop contacting him. If you are the only one that is starting up convo and he is not doing anything first then that is a sign he's not interested in anything more then friends. If he was he would be after you chasing, not the other way round. Stop contacting him. You may feel upset and hurt but don't anymore time on him. You have him on a pedestal and he doesn't deserve that.

[elaine567]

He has a gf.

She may be long distance but he obviously wishes to remain true to her.

 

YOU are projecting all your feelings onto him.

He is just being a student.

It is YOU that sees the deeper meaning in everything he does.

 

It has now got to the stage where he is trying to avoid you...

Keep away from him, he is not interested in you.

[pc31]

Since it's senior year, it's very likely that because he doesn't know where his life will take after graduation, so he doesn't want anything too serious with you (or with anyone for that matter).

 

If you are sure that you can control your emotions if he wants to break up AT graduation, which is only 2 months from now, then I'd say in ypur next conversation with him, you can drop hint by sharing your general opinion such as you don't think people should ignore their feelings even if the relationship is short because not all relationships are meant to last; personally if somebody asks you out right now and you also like the guy, you probably would say yes and see where the future takes etc.etc. That kind of general talk might give him a bit more green light to take some action.

 

Good luck.

[d0nnivain]

In all this time if he hasn't asked you on a date or moved to kiss you it's unlikely that he feels romantically inclined toward you. You mention some other girl. It's possible she is his GF & you are just a friend.

 

 

Sadly what you are experiencing is called "unrequited love." It's painful because your feelings aren't returned.

[sofff]

Thank you so much for your replies!

You are probably right, it is probably one-sided. Can a guy step back if he knows the girl is from a very different culture, possibly clashing with his?

Also, this guy is an athlete in our school. Usually girls are all over him and they usually initiate and are pretty clear about what they're after. But I have not been very clear or "obvious." The closest thing to flirting is smiling a lot and playing with my hair (from being nervous lol) and initiating talk online..I am also thinking maybe he doesn't know what to expect from me?

 

PS. I forgot to mention he initiated contact this one time and he asked a very very random question to the point where i was kind of confused by it.

 

Also, do you guys think, as one person mentioned above, that he is avoiding me right now? I really don't want to come off as creepy or desperate.. :'(

Edited April 8, 2017 by sofff