Struggling to forget/get over her

[Alexx94]

Long story short, I had a GF for 4 years from the age of 15-19. She broke up with me 2 months ago. Our relationship was pretty much as perfect as could be but we always had the same problem - I was paranoid when she would go out because she got so much boy attention, and I never really dealt with it so it persisted and was probably the main reason why we broke up.

 

Just last week I spoke to her after being NC for a while and she said how it was the right decision, shes not in love with me anymore, doesnt ever want to get back with me etc etc.

 

So yeah, Im just really struggling to forget about her and move on, any advice/tips? Its harder because Im home for Easter from university I would see her... but i have nothing to do other than revise/go gym.

 

Thanks

[Knix]

I would say best decision is just to move on. Any friends in the area you can go hang out with? Try distracting yourself with tinder or some other dating site.

[Cephalopod]

First love is always the most intense and passionate. It hurts, but know that millions have been where you are now and they made it through the pain and moved on to newer and ore fulfilling relationships. You will too.

 

You cannot make someone love you or stay in love with you. It doesn't work that way. The best you can do is let her go and wish her well. Don't trash the positive memories of what you had with her by sullying them with begging and whining and being angry at her. All that will do is drive a permanent wedge between the two of you that the passage of time will never overcome. She will judge you to be an obsessive and annoying nuisance, and that is the memory of you that she will carry forwards. All the other good memories will be overshadowed by her last negative memories of you.

 

It will hurt for a long time. You will cry and ache and have terrible dreams. But it will pass.