When your partner dont communicate enough

[waterbottleemo]

I'm dating a girl who has never dated before. I had a talk with her about open communication, and she agree to pay more attention to it. Now she improved but she still hold off on stuff that makes her unhappy, then she explode when it builds up, leaving me shocked when a fight erupt.

 

I would then fight with her a bit (usually text, give us time to cool down and think before getting our point across), then usually I would take the lead and lead the conversation to a softer tone and apologize if I did do something wrong.

 

The thing is after that she will feel bad about complaining, just last night she said she hate herself for keep on complaining and be needy.

 

I'm going to let her know it's ok and good that she is communicating her needs, and I appreciate it.

 

However I'm just afraid this might eventually lead to something bad. Would this stop her from communicate her needs even more now. If I encourage it would it become a learned behavior and she just keep focusing on the negatives and complain about everything, this will surely make both of us unhappy all the time.

 

Hope someone with actual experience can give me, not necessary answers, but some perspectives

 

Thanks

[d0nnivain]

All you can do is ask Qs along the way. If she doesn't tell you, when she does explode after keeping it all inside point out that you asked repeatedly & she lied to you by not answering honestly.

 

 

If the pattern continues conclude that you can't change her & make a decision about whether you want to stay in a relationship under those circumstances