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Proposal question


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aguyconfused

Hello,

I need some suggestions, I am thinking about proposing to my girlfriend. She seems to be ok with this idea, because a few weeks ago I asked her if she wanted to have input on a ring or if she wanted it to be a total surprise. She said she would love to go ring shopping. She told her parents who are now real excited. She has never met my family because they live 12 hours away. She is going home with me next month to meet them; she is very close to her family. So here’s my question should I propose while I am at my family’s house so they can see the ring or should I wait until we are back here so she is more comfortable? If I do it back at my family’s house I was going to have a day we would sneaky away and have an early dinner and go sit by the lake and watch the sunset and do it there. If we are back home, I figured we could go out have a nice dinner somewhere and find a good romantic spot and propose here.

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curiousnycgirl

Assuming she hits it off with your parents, I think it would be nice for you to propose while you guys are there. You guys have basically shared your whole relationship with her parents, but nothing with yours.

 

Of course if they don't hit it off - wait til you get home and go with plan B.

 

Whenever you do it - best of luck to you!

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clandestinidad

Personally I dont want to be proposed to w/ other people around while it happens OR afterwards. I'd rather go away somewhere for the weekend. That way, after the question-popping, happy moment you can still be enjoying it alone together....to cuddle, have sex, whatever.

 

Otherwise, you interrupt your private moment.....but thats just me

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Choose a place that is special to both of you, and a time when it's just the two of you. Personally, I wouldn't want to be asked during a visit with parents -- too stressful, and not just "ours."

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I don't know if it's a good idea to think about marriage already. I always thought it would be better to get married when you know your partner welll and that also includes his family and friends. In my opinion, this is too early to think about marriage. (Ok, that is off-topic, but nevertheless I think people should be more careful before they get married, there's a good reason why divorce rate is so high)

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clandestinidad

At first I was going to disagree w/ Loony...but then I read your old post about her. Its from april...its now the end of July....what has happened since all of those 'breaks'/break-ups that she wanted. And do you really think that its stable enough at this point?? If you do, then thats up to you obviously.

 

Anyway, I still think a private proposal weekend would be the best....whenever you end up doing it

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After reading the old post that kat23 mentioned I'm even more convinced that proposing to her now is a really bad idea.

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aguyconfused

I admit some part of me hopes she is stable now; but right after I posted that we got back together. Since then she has always made the time to be with me. Her family loves me because I have treated her very well. I am nervous about asking her dad like any guy would be. I have to admit yes I have thought about that occasionally, but I still love her and you know love does make us blind.

 

Anyway I was going to do it away from my family. This is the first girlfriend I have ever brought home. My mom and my sisters I am not worried about because of the fact if I love her they don’t care they will like her. My mom is the only one that knows I am coming home and she is so excited. She has told me she had almost given up thinking I was going to marry. I am close to my family and go home whenever I can but that usually is only once maybe twice a year. So if I do this after we get back my family will not see the ring for several months.

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I still don't understand why people rush into something like marriage when they're not even able to manage a stable relationship. Marriage will only make things worse. I understand that people marry when they're in love and experience this complete bliss with their partner who fulfills their needs and dreams, I don't understand it though why people voluntarily put a chain around their foot and neck when they don't feel that their relationship is perfect. Yes, a lot of people think their partner is perfect and they realize their mistake when they stand before the ruins of their marriage, but how much chance to have success is there when things are far from ideal right from the start? Look at the divorce rates, these are not numbers, these are people like you who thought things would hopefully work out fine. Somehow. Someday. Somewhere.

 

Your marriage will be a nightmare, but I guess my second name is Cassandra anyway...

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