I don't like his friends at all

[Knix]

My boyfriend and I have been together for about a year and a half, our relationship is strong and I care about him a lot. He talked up his best friend for a while and how great and funny he was, but when I met him I was really annoyed. I was being incredibly sweet the whole time but his wife didn't even try to get to know me and acted like she wanted to go home the entire time they were with us. She kept arguing with him (in the 4 hours we were together) and he would keep apologizing to her. My boyfriend has this quirk that I've learned to put up with where if he's expressing a thought and someone talks over him he'll keep talking. I've learned that it's something he doesn't realize he does, but when he did it around his friend, the guy and his wife would look at each other like they had an inside joke, so rude. The next day they got up from our hotel we were nice enough to let them stay in and grabbed breakfast without us, and rudely left-- she acted like she was pissed off for the millionth time. I had a weird feeling she was being rude to me because she's not the prettiest looking girl around, and I felt her husband being very flirty and then would back off. I didn't want to overthink it so I let it go, my boyfriend didn't notice it either so I definitely didn't want to make waves.

My boyfriend also says it's because they're married now which is why he wants to wait a long time to get married. He couldn't be more off, they just suck. The worst part is that the guy unfriended me on Facebook and I think makes fun of me to my boyfriend, based on conversations he's told me about. My boyfriend doesn't think much of it but I'm really annoyed. This guy is also supposed to be his best friend, I'm really not sure what to do. The more I hear about them the less respect I have. Should I let this get to me?

Edited April 18, 2017 by Knix

[Larryville]

*I don't like his friends at all

*My boyfriend and I have been together for about a year and a half, our relationship is strong and I care about him a lot.

*He talked up his best friend for a while and how great and funny he was, but when I met him I was really annoyed.

*his wife didn't even try to get to know me and acted like she wanted to go home the entire time they were with us.

*She kept arguing with him (in the 4 hours we were together) and he would keep apologizing to her.

*My boyfriend has this quirk that I've learned to put up with where if he's expressing a thought and someone talks over him he'll keep talking.

*I've learned that it's something he doesn't realize he does, but when he did it around his friend, the guy and his wife would look at each other like they had an inside joke, so rude.

*My boyfriend also says it's because they're married now which is why he wants to wait a long time to get married. He couldn't be more off, they just suck.

*The worst part is that the guy unfriended me on Facebook and I think makes fun of me to my boyfriend, based on conversations he's told me about. My boyfriend doesn't think much of it but I'm really annoyed.

*This guy is also supposed to be his best friend

*The more I hear about them the less respect I have. Should I let this get to me?

The choice of the people we consider friends is important because “true” friends provide the best environment to grow as a person. Your boyfriends… “friend” seemingly brings out the worse.

 

While you indicate you care about him the fact that your boyfriends is seemingly oblivious of how you are treated and your feelings is problematic.

I don’t think you are overreacting and you will need to think long and hard about any long term future with your boyfriend.

 

The people you “choose” to be your friends are an extension of yourself. If your friends are idiot racist jerks… you likely are too. Mean, narcissistic, rude selfish… yup. You are a reflection of who you choose to bring into your life. Don’t know (you or) your boyfriends age, but don’t ignore this.

 

And this

 

I felt her husband being very flirty and then would back off. I didn't want to overthink it so I let it go, my boyfriend didn't notice it either

 

Means your boyfriend is not very perceptive or just flat clueless and in the long run will be a problem. While other likely will say you are overthinking I’m one who believes you should never ignore your gut and basic instincts.

[d0nnivain]

If you try to break apart this friendship, odds are your BF will break up with you instead. Him & this guy have history.

 

 

Say nothing. Avoid them as much as possible but don't prevent your BF from hanging out with them.

 

 

If you want to go the extra mile, reach out to the wife & try to befriend her. It took some of the wives of my husband's military buddies to warm up to me.

 

 

You are also projecting about why she wasn't friendly. For all you know they had a bad day, her boss may have yelled at her, somebody in her family may have been ill. You just don't know.

[preraph]

He unfriended you probably because his wife told him to. So why would you care about that anyway? As you said you find them annoying, so why would you try to be on their social media??

 

Your man comes with his friends and family as a package deal and it's not fair to expect him to stop just because you don't like him having friends or like his friends, whatever the case may be. But you can turn down any invitations you want to turn down to be around him or them as a couple. But don't seal yourself out entirely because if they should go out together, you might want the option to go keep an eye on your man, right?

[sandylee1]

So you hadn't met his best friend, but you were FB friends? If you've never met him before that day, him unfriending you is no big deal surely.

 

And if your BF assumes every marriage is like his friends, then he's not very wise or he has a limited view on things.

 

If my BFs friends annoyed me that much, I'd ensure I didn't socialise with them.