Jaime03 Posted July 30, 2005 Share Posted July 30, 2005 Ok, so I am really pissed off now. 3 days ago I posted about my ex and how he told me he had been thinking about me and all this stuff. We had not talked in months because he had told me he was "talking" with someone and I wasnt going to try to get with him while he was seeing someone. Well every now and then I hear from him and stuff and I will ask if he is seeing her and he says something like "we are talking" or its not important right now. He makes it seem when we talk that he is single but I know hes not. I do not bring it up when we talk but I just observe his comments. I talked to him 2 times this week and before that it had been like 2 months. I went by his house the other day to talk and stop all the game playing and just lay it out on the table. Well I saw her car there so i kept driving. I thought what nerve he has. To tell me he has been thinking about me and he knew that would make me start thinking about him again. It is like he wants that. He wants me to want him. I do not understand. I am done though. I was really good to him but some how everything was always my fault. i am done with it all though. It has put me down for too long now. I wonder what she would think if she knew he still thought about me and called me sometimes and stuff like that. Do you think it could just be sex or something to him with her? Do you think it could just be a thing and hes trying to keep me around in case? He said something not too long ago when he was seeing her. I got mad and texted him and said I was done and to leave me alone and he said "well i guess there is no chance of us in the future" Its like he wanted me to be like...NO wait i didnt mean it. But instead I said "what are you talking about you have a girlfriend". He is the type when I said to him one day..."I have deleted your number out of my phone and i am trying to forget it" So that day he went and changed his number... Kind of like Ill show her type thing. That is how he is. Dont get me wrong he has a heart of gold its just i feel he likes to play games with me. He would do soo much sweet stuff for me and then say things i think just to see how i would react. I dont want him back...I really dont. But I want him to want me back. I want him to be where I have been. How? I want him to wonder about me and what i am doing and I want hiim to know he cant have me like he thinks he always can. I need some really good advice on this one. Link to post Share on other sites
westernxer Posted July 30, 2005 Share Posted July 30, 2005 Best way to get back at him is to get over him, and not harbor any bitterness toward him. The next guy will certainly appreciate it, especially if he's good as gold. Link to post Share on other sites
mixwell Posted July 30, 2005 Share Posted July 30, 2005 If you don't want him back then why are you stressing over all this shiz ?? Just move on and get over it ! Seriously.. Thats the best way to get back at him.. Ignore his arse and don't respond.. Better yet tell him that you are seeing someone yourself or that you are dating but don't let him know too much just hint him in. Better yet you should actually be going out and meeting new people and trying to get back into the dating scene.. Don't waste anymore energy on this guy !! Link to post Share on other sites
Author Jaime03 Posted July 30, 2005 Author Share Posted July 30, 2005 You know for some reason I always thought about doing that. I actually did see someone for a little while but I never told him. The reason being because I thought that would just make him mad and he would just be like whatever. All of my girlfriends have always told me I need to play the game harder. I am too soft. I think if I said something like that it would make him not want me. I guess I am going about it the wrong way? I am getting better though. I have always been to available to my boyfriends...well most of them. Especially this one.. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Jaime03 Posted July 30, 2005 Author Share Posted July 30, 2005 Am I wrong on this? Link to post Share on other sites
Craig Posted July 30, 2005 Share Posted July 30, 2005 Originally posted by Jaime03 He is the type when I said to him one day..."I have deleted your number out of my phone and i am trying to forget it" So that day he went and changed his number... Kind of like Ill show her type thing. Tell him you deleted his address out of your address book--maybe he'll move. Girl, you're wasting too much time. Stick to no contact at all and move on (slowly.) Link to post Share on other sites
Maria46 Posted July 30, 2005 Share Posted July 30, 2005 From you subject post you wanted to get back at him. Forget that! What goes around, comes around. And forget about him and get on with your life. He is not worth your time. Good luck!! Link to post Share on other sites
NYCmitch25 Posted July 31, 2005 Share Posted July 31, 2005 To tell me he has been thinking about me and he knew that would make me start thinking about him again. It is like he wants that. He wants me to want him. I do not understand. I am done though. I was really good to him but some how everything was always my fault. i am done with it all though. It has put me down for too long now. I wonder what she would think if she knew he still thought about me and called me sometimes and stuff like that. Do you think it could just be sex or something to him with her? In quickly reading your post -- I understand how these relationships can get quite complicated and quite fast too. You guys sound like you have been having a tumulus relationship causing a chasm which may or may not be something you guys could overcome. I don't think that he is necessarily trying to drag your emotions though the dirt by showing interest in you, I think he actually has "some" feelings for you and it's perhaps coming off as if he is stringing you along because he's sending mix signals.(but I dont know this person, only you can really determine this) He is sending mixed signals because he is slightly conflicted himself; he has security with you but he likes the benefits of this new relationship (which he will continue with it). However, since he is actively seeking other relationships, you are going to become his safety net until he finds another woman. In short, the overall picture is that you are being emotionally used even though it might not be deliberate and the best thing for you would be to cut him off "cold turkey" and spare yourself a lot of extra pain. Of course that's easier said then done esp. for some people who perhaps show codependency tendencies (not saying you do) or self-worth issues or "history". I would be introspective for a short period of time, as a single gal not seeking a relationship and analyze how things deteriorated in your relationship(s) and see if there may be a pattern. If you think it's something similar then perhaps seek free counselling or so forth to resolve some issues you may have inherited from your parents/guardians. ps. I don't think I would try to seek revenge, as a previous poster put it, leaving him would be the best revenge. Link to post Share on other sites
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