The love of my life cheated on me. I'm dying inside.

[Funks]

Hey guys.

 

I'm seeking help, Let me start from the beginning. Be patient, it's worth it.

 

It was 4 months that I first met Kate. We clicked immediatly and it wasn't long until we were spending every moment we could together, we loved each other incredibly, I never thought i'd be so lucky. She'd tell me so much how she'd always love me. We spent every moment together, if we werent seeing each other, we certainly was on the phone to each other. It was a very intimate relationship and I loved every second of it, I thought she did too...

 

This monday, it was both our days off, so I said that i'm getting a bus to hers, she replys by saying 'No, I just need a day for myself' it was fair enough, I could do with a day too. But it was very odd not to be together. I missed her. She still kept in big contact with me all day. The following day, she had work, but not until 1pm. I said I'd better get over to hers, she said she missed me, but she was feeling sick. I was sympathetic and respected her.

 

That night, something was up. She kept phong me, crying to me how much she loves me etc. This is not unusal. She often gets emtotional over our love. I returned her love. Then she said that she'd done something so bad, and that she hatees herself etc, but she wouldent tell me.

After hours of nagotionating, I'd discovered that she'd been unfaithful to me. She's a firty girl by nature, which I'm okay with (most of the time) and I know she'd be with guys she knows if she wasn't with me. One of these guys, my friend, Shaun, managed to nab her phone number from someone. They spent a day texted, telling each other that they really liked each other and eventually phoning and talking for hours.

The following day, it turns out Shaun had asked her to go out to the pub with her, she agreed and she spent the day being unfaithful to me. It makes me sick to think about it.

 

She told me that she wanted new things and was bored. She's only 16 and she thinks she should be spending her time smoking, drinking and kissing random guys. Which she'd been doing up until I met her.

 

I am in a state of depression, I feel like my whole world has been rocked and I have no-one to turn to. She's my best friend and my life partner, I always thought we were soulmates. I don't know what to do with myself. To make matters worse, I often pick up the phone to talk to her, to tell her that I love, because I miss her. I miss her more than anything..

 

She keeps phoning me also, tells me she made a mistake and wants me back.. other times she wants me to go away and leave her.. It's all incredibly confusing. Apparently she wants me for her future, and wants me to wait for her after she's finished her 'phase'. That's not something I can do.

 

I need help. I can't sleep, eat or concentrate on anything else. I love her so much. How can I get over her?

[Bree_Carns]

Originally posted by Funks

She keeps phoning me also, tells me she made a mistake and wants me back.. other times she wants me to go away and leave her.. It's all incredibly confusing. Apparently she wants me for her future, and wants me to wait for her after she's finished her 'phase'. That's not something I can do.

 

I need help. I can't sleep, eat or concentrate on anything else. I love her so much. How can I get over her?

 

Oi oi oi...... she's 16, huh? I don't quite know how this message will help, but I'll try to be supportive though. Are you doing no contact with her? I've had friends in a dilemma like this....its no fun. Everyone thinks they have their oats to sew...I can understand why she says she's in a "phase" because I too as a 17 yr old girl, last year I felt like I needed to get myself "OUT" there and experience some things first.

 

I would cut contact with her for awhile...like a week or two. When you say "Apparently she wants me for her future, and wants me to wait for her after she's finished her 'phase'. That's not something I can do." By thats not something you can do, the idea of it disgusts you, right? I've had to learn this year, that just about everybody has skeletons in their closet. I would stay away from her for awhile to keep yourself from getting hurt more...she's already done damage. How is that fair to you, that she wants you to stick around until she's finished with this stuff?

 

try to keep your head up, people here know what you're going through

[SoftDrink]

i am sorry you're so upset, and i don't know how old you are, but she is ONLY 16.

 

she is probably going to do these kinds of things until she grows up a bit, because right now she is too young to know what she wants.

 

you're better off moving on without her. if she did this to you with one of your friends, she'll do it again with someone else if you forgive her.

 

move on, and let her grow up and experience things normal teenagers experience.

[dr strangelove]

Hi

 

Im writing to you from your girlfriends point of view. I met a wonderful woman, and I really had deep feelings for her. But i was unsure and I continued to meet other women. One time I remember almost crying cause im missed my girlfriend so much and this is when I was with someone else, actually it happened more then a few times.

 

Why? well I did it partly cause I wasnt sure about her and partly cause I liked the attention of attractive women.

Isnt all bad for you though, she has only hung out with this guy. Its normal to have second thoughts. Id just let her come to you. Plus you are both very young.

[lostinmymind]

This happened to me. Although, in my case my girlfriend knew enough that she wanted to "try other things" that she told me long before she met anyone else. It's so hard to go through, I know. I am still sad after months, you just have to allow yourself to be. You've gotta try to better yourself though, she won't come back to you or you won't get another girl if you don't care about yourself. Caring about yourself will be a win-win situation no matter what happens in the end. You can pull through this dude, I'm slowly doing this too.

 

She now is with another guy. She told me to 'just let her get things out of her system' before and now she says 'don't act like i'm just getting things out of my system'. The reality of it all is that she doesn't know what she wants and she lacks the experience to really know what she is doing. The grass will always be greener until you actually learn that it's not. She has to learn that she can't do this to people she loves, cause they won't stick around in pain forever.

 

This seems to be a common thing. She won't forget about you or about all the good times you had and how much you loved each other. That doesn't mean, though, that she will realize she wants it back. It's funny how things work.

 

You need to respect her decision and let her go. Don't try sticking around, and don't let her use you as a backup. If she someday decides she wants you back, and if she REALLY wants you back, she will fight for your trust again (and make sure you make her fight for it too).

[aares]

Slut. Leave her b1tch azz in teh past, and keep her there. Dont go back to her, no matter how much you miss her. Can you live with the fact that she f***ed some other guy while she was lying to you the entire time? You will never trust her again. Let her go back to smoking and drinking and f***ing many many random guys.