Am I wrong for thinking my sister & BIL are selfish parents?

[StillHurtin]

My sister called me Friday night and left me a voicemail that she needed to ask me something. My bil answered and asked me if I could watch their kids Friday as they were going camping. He said my mom was going to watch them Thursday night and Friday but was wondering if I could take them Friday afternoon to go swimming. He asked me if I would have them spend the night Friday night so my mom didn't have them so long. My mom has heart disease and has had several stents and a bi-pass and so she tires easily so they want me to help out. He told me that his kids have not been to the new pool this summer and want to go so asked if I would take them. I told him I could take them swimming but as for spending the night I couldn't b/c I have plans w/ my inlaws that are in town.

 

It's pretty sad that my sister hasn't bothered taking her kids to the new pool all summer long. She has plenty of time to do it but yet she wants me to do it. And this weekend is the fair and so they aren't taking their kids b/c they will be gone on a camping trip alone. I told my bil the fair was also this weekend and I would rather not take extra children w/ me. Last year they went camping during the fair and had his mom and my parent's take them to the fair. It is just their selfish way of getting out of it.

 

I really don't want to go swimming all day long as I don't like to swim. I use to take my kids all the time when they were younger but now they are old enough to go alone. My bil isn't comforable having me drop off his kids at the pool w/o me even though they are old enough by pool regulations not to have an adult w/ them.

 

It's pretty damn selfish never to take your own kids to the pool and ask someone else to do it. It's also damn selfish to take a camping trip alone during the fair weekend when the children want to go.

 

My sister gets on my a$$ b/c my dd is in soccer, basketball, track, and softball, it's something she loves to do and we encourage her and praise her for doing such an awesome job. She thinks we are pushing her into doing sports and we aren't. She says she is going to get burned out and she can't beleive she lets her do so much. Her children don't do anything, at all. They don't even have friends come over nor do they go over to other friends houses. They lead a very sheltered life. No one her two kids fight like cats and dogs all the time.

[suegail]

it really sounds sad for the kids. I can't imagine why they'd leave the kids out of a camping trip. Doing family things like that is important for kids, and yes, I feel they are being selfish.

 

I'm sure that those kids will always remember any activities you, as aunt, included them in. I've never forgotten the times when I was a kid when my grandparents took me different places. Those are treasured memories, even just a trip to the park or I can remember when my grandfather and I used to sit at a little airport and watch planes coming and going.

 

It's just too bad that your sister and brother in law are looking for ways to get others to spend the time with their kids, time they should be spending with them. It's unfortunate.

[seagirl]

I am on your side. When i was a kid I used to love camping-still do. We are trying to get our son involved in all kinds of family activities that do not involve TV and just being together.

 

Has you sis and bil always been like this? Has anyone brought this to their attention? If you choose to do it be careful, people like that are usually too selfish to even see their own behavior and may bvlame you for being too selfish for not wanting to watvh thei kids.

 

good uck!!

[StillHurtin]

Originally posted by seagirl

I am on your side. When i was a kid I used to love camping-still do. We are trying to get our son involved in all kinds of family activities that do not involve TV and just being together.

 

Has you sis and bil always been like this? Has anyone brought this to their attention? If you choose to do it be careful, people like that are usually too selfish to even see their own behavior and may bvlame you for being too selfish for not wanting to watvh thei kids.

 

good uck!!

 

 

I agree, my parents took us camping for a week or two twice a summer when we were younger. They never went w/o us kids. The only time they took a trip w/o us was when we were really young and that is when they went to the Bahamas. Other than that one time, they always took us. Going on a camping trip should be for the whole family, not a get away from your kids. My bil's parent's watch their kids almost every Saturday and Saturday night into Sunday morning alone, why do they feel they need to take this camping trip alone and expect everyone else to take care of their kids? It's not like they never get time alone, they get it every weekend.

 

My H and I don't get time alone except when my inlaws are back from out of state visiting for the summer. They take the kids for a week. But that's only during the year we get times to ourselves. We aren't fortunate enough to have someone watch our kids every single weekend and we would never expect or ask someone to do that for us.

 

I just think it's sad they haven't bothered taking my niece's to the pool this year. I guess I can look at this way, they will always remember that their aunt took them to the first, and probably only time, to the new pool.

 

I feel badly that I think of them as being selfish parents b/c I do feel they are good parents but when it comes to letting them do anything, like going to the pool, is sad.

 

I can't talk to them about it, they will hit the roof. They have been this way since they have their children, always taking a camping trip alone. This is the second time this year they have went w/o their kids.

 

And I don't know if anyone is taking them to the fair this weekend, I bet their other grandma does b/c she did last year b/c they went on a camping trip w/o them. My mom said she and my dad took them last year but probably wont this year.

 

It's pretty obivious my sis and bil took this trip on fair weekend so they didn't have to bother taking their kids to the fair. Pretty sad.

[MsBlink]

Well, I do believe it's okay for your sis and BIL to want to spend time together. Afterall, before children were a factor, they were each other's priority. Now, however, dumpin' your kids off is total bull and they need to be much more responsible. You only get to raise your children once--after which, they are their own responsibility. And yes, there are some exceptions to this, but they need not take that into consideration unless an unfortunate event arises. They need to embrace their children while they still can. Please don't consider them selfish...just unaware of the influence they have on their children's lives.

 

Talk to them about that, not about their sucky parenting skills, and DO NOT ever let your sister tell you that you're not raising your child(ren) in a caring manner. You are involved in your DD's life! I wish you much patience with this situation...Keep us updated!

[StillHurtin]

Originally posted by MsBlink

Well, I do believe it's okay for your sis and BIL to want to spend time together. Afterall, before children were a factor, they were each other's priority. Now, however, dumpin' your kids off is total bull and they need to be much more responsible. You only get to raise your children once--after which, they are their own responsibility. And yes, there are some exceptions to this, but they need not take that into consideration unless an unfortunate event arises. They need to embrace their children while they still can. Please don't consider them selfish...just unaware of the influence they have on their children's lives.

 

Talk to them about that, not about their sucky parenting skills, and DO NOT ever let your sister tell you that you're not raising your child(ren) in a caring manner. You are involved in your DD's life! I wish you much patience with this situation...Keep us updated!

 

MsBlink, I am not going to bite your head off, lol. I agree that parent's do need to spend some quality time alone w/o their children. They need to keep that love alive and spend that time together alone once in awhile. My kids are getting older so H and I are able to go do something for a few hours alone, in town, (but we call them a lot to check up on them).

 

I guess what irks me is that I had to be the one to take them to the new pool for the first time. I flat out asked my sister why she hasn't taken them yet and she told me "I don't go to town unless I need to go to the store. Plus, they have their own pool here (at home). There is no reason to take them to the pool." My sister lives about 5 or 6 miles from the pool. I don't understand how she doesn't want to ever take them to the pool BUT she expects me too.

 

My niece's had a great time at the pool, they were so excited! I asked them if they have ever been to a pool like that. They said the only time they have been to a pool is that day and when I had my dd's 10th bday party at the motel and there was a pool. In their little 10 and 8 1/2 year old lives they have never been to a swimming pool. I asked my youngest niece if she was having fun and she said she was. I told her that since she is having such a great time maybe her mom could bring her sometime. This is what she said: "My mom wont bring us. She says it's too expensive and it's an unneeded expense." I had to laugh to myself about that (even though I felt badly for her). It's too $ for my sister, and an unneeded expense, BUT she expected me to take them when I am laid off from my job all summmer, her H makes twice as much money as I do, she makes about $10,000 a year selling her pups (she breeds pure breds), and plus she works and makes more than me. Just baffles me about all of that. My H said if they took their girls to the pool that means they wouldn't have any money for beer. Which is true, they drink a lot of beer.

 

I have decided that I am just not going to do this again. My bil offered to pay me and my kids way in a week b4 I took them swimming and they raised a stink about it. They ended up not paying for my way or my kid's way into the pool so my mom gave me some money to take them b/c she knew I was having financial problems w/ being laid off from work. Just a bunch of crap!

 

I am glad it's over. And when I speak to my sister I am going to brag about how well her girls did at the pool. How neat it was too see them having so much fun at the new pool, how great they did jumping off the diving boards for the first time in their precious lives. I am just going to make her feel soooo guilty for not being the one to see it. Mean? Maybe, but maybe if she would give her girls a little bit more of a life outside of home maybe she wouldn't have to feel so bad about it

[seagirl]

You just do what you are doing for those kids. They will always remember you for giving them their childhood.

 

I can totally relate, my sister doesn't take my nephew anywhere except to the grocery store-I mean that literally.

 

I even asked him ( he's five) what kinds of things him and his mom and dad do and he always says "just nothin" I have probed further and asked him when was the last time he went here or there and he always says it was with me. I feel bad for him b/c he is such a good kid and they are too wrapped up in their own selves that they are missing it and he is suffering for it.

[magda]

You ask if you are wrong for thinking that they're selfish? I don't know if you're *wrong* but definitely bitter, critical and uncharitable. Really , like you say, it's just a trip to the pool. If it should have been so easy for her to have done it by now, why is it such a pain in the ass for you? They're 8 and 10, you can sit around tanning and reading magazines. Maybe instead of acting like a martyr you could set a good example of how easy and rewarding it was to take them. If you can't, I think you should say "no" next time to doing these favors if you do it without a giving heart.

 

If they always go camping the weekend of the fair that isn't really doesn't seem like a big deal. Or you think they go camping just as a selfish way of getting out of going to the fair? That seems kind of extreme. And "you don't want extra children with you". I can understand your annoyance at feeling like they're being dumped on you, but really how many children do you have to watch already? And they have never been to a public pool but they have their own pool. It really doesn't seem that bad to me. Not to say that your sister and BIL aren't selfish because they may be. If the kids never go anywhere that's sad. But it sounds like you have a competition going with your sister and you're mad at her comments about how you raise your children, and whatever other baggage. You really need to work on your relationship with your sister and BIL, it seems to me. "Resentment is poison", and all that...

[StillHurtin]

Originally posted by magda

You ask if you are wrong for thinking that they're selfish? I don't know if you're *wrong* but definitely bitter, critical and uncharitable. Really , like you say, it's just a trip to the pool. If it should have been so easy for her to have done it by now, why is it such a pain in the ass for you? They're 8 and 10, you can sit around tanning and reading magazines. Maybe instead of acting like a martyr you could set a good example of how easy and rewarding it was to take them. If you can't, I think you should say "no" next time to doing these favors if you do it without a giving heart.

 

Yea, maybe I am a little bitter w/ my sister. I have watched her girls so she can have time alone w/ her H several times since I moved here. I have not charged her for watching her kids, and I never would charge her. I asked her to watch my kids twice a week for the summer when school was out. She said she would but was going to charge me. NP, she is watching my kids, I should pay her.

I am bitter b/c I am broke, she knew it, he knew it, he offered to pay my way into the pool to supervise THEIR kids but then they decide they were not going to pay my way into the pool and expected ME to pay my own way in to watch THEIR girls! Yes, I am f@ckin bitter! I took time out of MY day to watch THEIR girls they least they could of done is paid MY way into the damn pool! If they expect me to take their girls to the pool they better pay my way in our I am not going. I would never ask them to take my kids to the pool and not pay my sister's way in (But then again she would never take my kids to the pool and I would never ask her to). It's pretty damn sad my sister is so damn selfish she can't even take the time to take her OWN kids to the pool but expects ME too. That is was pisses me off and makes me bitter. I could not read a magazine at the pool. How do you supervise children in the pool when you have your nose in a damn magazine? You can't. You have to watch them like an Hawk to make sure they don't get hurt, or hurt anyone else. Kids move fast! Anything can happen in a second and your eyes have to be on those kids. Do you have children? If you do then you know

If they always go camping the weekend of the fair that isn't really doesn't seem like a big deal. Or you think they go camping just as a selfish way of getting out of going to the fair? That seems kind of extreme. And "you don't want extra children with you". I can understand your annoyance at feeling like they're being dumped on you, but really how many children do you have to watch already? And they have never been to a public pool but they have their own pool. It really doesn't seem that bad to me. Not to say that your sister and BIL aren't selfish because they may be. If the kids never go anywhere that's sad. But it sounds like you have a competition going with your sister and you're mad at her comments about how you raise your children, and whatever other baggage. You really need to work on your relationship with your sister and BIL, it seems to me. "Resentment is poison", and all that...

 

Yes, they go camping w/o their girls every time the fair comes. And yes, it's their selfish way of getting out of going. They buy their girls tickets to go and they expect someone else to take them. My sister flat out told me she hates taking them to the fair. My sister doesn't like going anywhere were there is a lot of ppl. Hence, the reason why she doesn't want to take them to the fair, doesn't want to take them to the pool, why she hates going shopping. My sister is a very happy person, but when it comes to being around a lot of ppl, she hates it. I don't like crowds myself, but I am not going to let that ruin my kids childhood b/c I hate crowds. I suck it up and do it for my kids. How many kids do I have to watch already? I have my own two to watch. Going to the fair is our family time, we do it every year, and I flat out refuse to take other ppl's kids w/ us. The fair is a busy place. I refuse to add to more kids. It's our family time, I will not babysit on our family trips, period. I did it one time and it was hell. It ruined my fun w/ my kids and I will not do it again. That is MY progative and I am not going to make anyone make me feel guilty for not wanting to take two extra kids. It is easy for you to say "What's two extra kids." when you aren't the one having to take them.

I watched them at the pool, I wasn't going to watch them at the fair too.

 

Yes, I get upset at my sister for commenting negatively on how I raise my kids. What parents wouldn't be? Wouldn't you be upset if someone was making negative comments on how you raise your kids? It is none of her damn business if I let my dd play soccer, softball, basketball, and track. She loves it, it is her passion and she is damn good at it (best on her team, no kidding) and I am not going to tell her she can't do something she loves and is good at. She tells me she is too young to play, and she never even ask her kids if they want to play sports, she doesn't give them a choice. Her oldest wants to play basketball and her mom told her to wait a few years.

 

I don't see a competition between my sister and myself. I just stated a fact that her H and her make more money than we do and they bitched about paying my way into the pool to watch their girls but expect me to pay when I am on unemployment.

Me bitching and complaining about having to pay my way into the pool has nothing to do w/ competition. It has everything to do w/ her having me take HER kids to the pool but expects me to pay my way in. It's like babysitting. You pay the sitter to take your kids somewhere, you should pay someone else to take your kids somewhere. You shouldn't expect them to pay their own way in. Even though they are my niece's I was still babysitting them. It was rude of him to offer to pay my way in and then back out and then expect me to pay my own way in to watch their girls. If I was going to the pool anyhow then I wouldn't be expecting them to pay my way in.

 

Sorry I am gettin so pissy about this. It just irks me off they told me they would pay my way into the pool and then take back their offer and expected me to pay to watch their girls. I should of flat out said NO but the reason why I didn't is b/c my mom was watching them and my sister asked me to take them to the pool to give my mom a break. I babysat for my sister to help my mom out, not to help my sister out.

[mom2J&A]

Posted: Sat Aug 06, 2005 6:09 am Post subject:

 

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I'm just amazed how petty your BIL & sister are about the small amt of money it would have cost them to have you take their kids out and the big stink that they made about it. I just can't imagine it. But I think that it was good for you to be there with them.

It all just seems so silly. If someone would have laid off a six pack of beer or a pack of cigarettes, then it would have been covered. To carry on and complain so much over the price of the admission is beyond me. Unfortunately, you are just going to have to put your foot down a little harder in the future. Take care and have a good weekend and try and forget about this.

[magda]

Well, you need to get a little backbone dealing with them. I just can't imagine anybody making you take their kids to the pool and then refusing to pay your way. Doesn't mean it didn't happen, but wow. You just glared at them and left, or what? I just find it difficult to believe that they are really that cheap and horrible yet you still are on speaking terms and still putting up with it. Next time say, "Ha! fork over the 3 bucks." Your sister apparently has no problem asking for your money. You might consider sitting down with her and arrange an exchange. Like, trade off every other saturday or some such thing.

 

You seem to think of your neices as babysitting charges rather than family, and that is what I think is sad about your relationship with your sister. I think you ought to improve your communication with her instead of just quietly resenting her and grudgingly putting up with it.

[StillHurtin]

Originally posted by magda

Well, you need to get a little backbone dealing with them. I just can't imagine anybody making you take their kids to the pool and then refusing to pay your way. Doesn't mean it didn't happen, but wow. You just glared at them and left, or what? I just find it difficult to believe that they are really that cheap and horrible yet you still are on speaking terms and still putting up with it. Next time say, "Ha! fork over the 3 bucks." Your sister apparently has no problem asking for your money. You might consider sitting down with her and arrange an exchange. Like, trade off every other saturday or some such thing.

 

You seem to think of your neices as babysitting charges rather than family, and that is what I think is sad about your relationship with your sister. I think you ought to improve your communication with her instead of just quietly resenting her and grudgingly putting up with it.

 

Oh believe me it did happen. I have tried getting a backbone w/ them but this is how my bil is: Two weeks ago he asked me if I could help watch their kids while they went camping. I told him I had plans, my inlaws were in town from out of state. He said "You ARE watching our kids that weekend." Again, I told him I had plans, I get the same comment "You ARE watching our kids that weekend!" I ignored him. A week later he told me (over the phone) that he will pay my way and my kids way into the pool if I took his kids. He said it was the least they could do if I would do that for them. The day b4 I was going to take them my sis called and asked me how much the pool was. I told her $3 for kids, $5 for adults. She said she would give me $10 and the extra $4 was for her girls to have $2 each for snacks. I told her I can't afford to go, I'm on unemployment. She got pissy, and said she called me back. She called a few hours later and told me that I didn't need to go, she was just going to pay her kids way in. This was all over the phone so I just didn't glare at her and walk away.

 

Honestly, I would rather never ask her to watch my kids again. There is no reason for her too, and if I want anyone to watch my kids it would be my sil. I work for a preschool. I love my job, love the kids in my class, but I really value my weekends off to get a break from other ppl's children. The last thing I want to do w/ my time on the weekends is babysit other ppl's kids. The weekends are my break from other ppl's kids so I would rather not babysit, period. My kids are old enough to stay home alone so when H and I need time alone they stay at home and we call and check up on them. We don't need a sitter anymore.

 

You said: "You seem to think of your neices as babysitting charges rather than family" I don't think of my neices as babysitting charges, I don't charge to babysit for my neices, but my sister charges me to watch my kids. My son is almost 12, a legal age to babysit so he stays home w/ his 10 yo sister while I work. I would NEVER charge my sister to babysit her kids, family doesn't charge family to babysit, we trade off babysitting, but my sister wanted paid. If what you meant was that it's sad I am bitching b/c I had to pay my way in to watch my neices swim well, then I guess that is just sad then. I didn't have to take her girls to the pool. I didn't have to do that favor for my sister. If she expects me to take them places she needs to help by paying my way in also. I don't charge her for babysitting, but at least she could of done is paid my way into the pool like my bil offered. I took time out of my day to take them swimming. She can't expect someone to do things for her kids and have the sitter pay all the expenses.

 

I don't want to be upset at my sister, I love her very much, but it ticks me off she was such a damn tight a$$ not to pay my way in to supervise her kids. I wont do it again, that is for sure. If she can't afford to pay my way in to the pool, she needs to find someone else who will do it. She can't expect me to pay to watch her girls.

[RecordProducer]

Hi SH

 

Honestly I understand both you and your sister. If I were you I would feel the same and if I were her I would want to have some time with my H.

In any case, I can tell you about me. I don't like taking my kids anywhere. My ex takes them out all the time, my mom too, I am just not the type to do it. Sometimes I take them downtown and we have food and drinks and whatever, but basically I hate that particular obligation. Yet I am not a selfish and bad mother overall or so I believe. When I cuddle with my kids or talk to them, they know how crazy I am about them and they love me to death.

I guess I have accepted myself the way I am as a mother and I want them to accept me the way I am. And I think they do. Now my mom is not around for 3 weeks and I have set my own rules with them and when I get pissed they ask me "why are ou angry? can't you say it in a nice way?" and I tell them "you're right... sorry, I am just nervous today and I need some peace." But when my mom is around we're all very tensed. She is in her menopause and gets pissed at all of us for no reason. When I am alone with them, things are just great.

What I am saying is, your sister might be under the influence of her husband who wants to be without the kids and skip some obligations like going to the pool, etc. That's why he offered to pay you. Don't think that it's your sister. I am sure she doesn't have a perfect marriage and she's doing whatever is in her power to preserve it the way she can. Even if that means using you.

[StillHurtin]

Originally posted by RecordProducer

Hi SH

 

Honestly I understand both you and your sister. If I were you I would feel the same and if I were her I would want to have some time with my H.

In any case, I can tell you about me. I don't like taking my kids anywhere. My ex takes them out all the time, my mom too, I am just not the type to do it. Sometimes I take them downtown and we have food and drinks and whatever, but basically I hate that particular obligation. Yet I am not a selfish and bad mother overall or so I believe. When I cuddle with my kids or talk to them, they know how crazy I am about them and they love me to death.

I guess I have accepted myself the way I am as a mother and I want them to accept me the way I am. And I think they do. Now my mom is not around for 3 weeks and I have set my own rules with them and when I get pissed they ask me "why are ou angry? can't you say it in a nice way?" and I tell them "you're right... sorry, I am just nervous today and I need some peace." But when my mom is around we're all very tensed. She is in her menopause and gets pissed at all of us for no reason. When I am alone with them, things are just great.

What I am saying is, your sister might be under the influence of her husband who wants to be without the kids and skip some obligations like going to the pool, etc. That's why he offered to pay you. Don't think that it's your sister. I am sure she doesn't have a perfect marriage and she's doing whatever is in her power to preserve it the way she can. Even if that means using you.

 

Hi back RP

Is there a reason why you don't like taking your kids anywhere? Is it b/c you don't like being around crowds like my sister? Some ppl are just that way, and there is nothing wrong w/ that. My very good friend has bi-polar and b4 she was diagnosed she couldn't go to places where there was a crowd b/c she would have panic attacks. It's just the way she is. Now that she is taking meds for her bi-polar she is comfortable going out in crowds.

 

My sister and bil do take their kids places, but not to places where there is a crowd. They take them to the river in an area where it's just them. They take them to the lake a few times a year as they have a friend who owns a trailer there they use. They take them to the park where they live (in a town that's not even incorporated so there is probably a total of 200, if that, ppl living there). It's not like they don't do anything w/ them, they do.

 

I agree that I enjoy my time away from our kids for H and I to be alone, we don't get it very much. My parents haven't watched my kids in about a year. My inlaws take them once or twice for a week in the summer time so that is nice. My sis and bil get time alone almost every Saturday until Sunday morning so it's not like they don't get to spend that time alone. They get a lot more time than we do. I have watched my nieces several times since I have been back in my hometown so her and my bil can have time alone. I have never asked my sister nor my sil to watch my kids for personal reasons, it's always when I have to work. I was glad my kids didn't need a sitter this summer. I got sick of my sister backing out of babysitting when she told me she would so I had to rush and find another sitter, which ended up being my mom. I don't like my mom to watch my kids much. She has heart disease and has had several stents and a triple bi-pass. She tires very easily so I would rather her not watch my kids much.

 

I called my mom to see how the rest of the time went w/ my neices. I asked her if she knew if my sis and bil were back yet from camping. My mom said my sister called this morning to let her know they were back in town and asked how the girls were for her. She has been back for aobut 8 hours and has she bothered calling ME to tell me thank you for taking her girls to the pool? NOPE! And I refuse to call her. If I don't get a TY I wont do it again.

[RecordProducer]

Originally posted by StillHurtin

Hi back RP

Is there a reason why you don't like taking your kids anywhere? Is it b/c you don't like being around crowds like my sister?

 

No, not at all. I just feel bored when I have to take them out in the park and do nothing while they're playing. I take them with me when I have to go somewhere and do something. I think it's boring to sit in McDonlad's for a couple hours and not even be able to smoke a cigarette.

My ex-husband goes out with them and bulshlts with the women in front of his building. I can't do that. I just find it dull. For example, tomorrow I have to go to the bank so I'll take my kids with me, we'll walk to the place and back, but if I have to sit on the bench and wait for them to ride their bycicles every day, rather shoot me!

I think your sister is being rather inconsiderate to you than a selfish parent. That's all. I mean, we all want to get rid of our kids for a day or two once in a while, don't we?

[StillHurtin]

Originally posted by RecordProducer

No, not at all. I just feel bored when I have to take them out in the park and do nothing while they're playing. I take them with me when I have to go somewhere and do something. I think it's boring to sit in McDonlad's for a couple hours and not even be able to smoke a cigarette.

My ex-husband goes out with them and bulshlts with the women in front of his building. I can't do that. I just find it dull. For example, tomorrow I have to go to the bank so I'll take my kids with me, we'll walk to the place and back, but if I have to sit on the bench and wait for them to ride their bycicles every day, rather shoot me!

I think your sister is being rather inconsiderate to you than a selfish parent. That's all. I mean, we all want to get rid of our kids for a day or two once in a while, don't we?

 

Rp, I know exactly how you feel about the boredom. I got bored taking my kids too, lol. We usually don't do the park anymore since my kids are getting older but I remember when they were younger and taking them. I would sit off to the side and watch them play, and was bored to death, lol. I always had my cell phone and would call family and friends. I ran a daycare out of my home so when I took my kids and the dc kids I would always have another daycare provider meet me there and we would swing the kids and chat.

 

My H doesn't do much w/ the kids but once in awhile he will take them to the ball games or the races. When we were seperated he did a few things w/ them, things I was suprised by b/c he never did that when we were 2gether.

 

I miss my kids being young, but at times it's nice they are older.