victoria88 Posted May 12, 2017 Share Posted May 12, 2017 I am thinking about having a boyfriend. However I earn well but not much. My question for the men is : Would you avoid having a relationship with a women who is financially unstable? Does it matter how much I earn for a relationship? Women can give some advice too. Thank you! Link to post Share on other sites
kendahke Posted May 12, 2017 Share Posted May 12, 2017 I am thinking about having a boyfriend. However I earn well but not much. My question for the men is : Would you avoid having a relationship with a women who is financially unstable? Does it matter how much I earn for a relationship? Women can give some advice too. Thank you! I'm a woman. I'd date you, but I don't think I'd allow things to get serious unless you were actively correcting the issues that are making you financially unstable. If you're making $65,000, but you're dodging bill collectors because you're not paying your bills due to the fact you're in the stores and in the clubs, then I'd have to keep you at arm's length. And no, I wouldn't offer to help you pay your bills because I'm only dating you, not in a relationship with you. Big difference. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
d0nnivain Posted May 12, 2017 Share Posted May 12, 2017 Some men will care. Some won't. My experience is that most quality people judge on effort & work ethic rather than monetary achievement. If you are not in danger of going bankrupt & you don't spend beyond your means, your financial situation is probably not an insurmountable obstacle. Especially if you are young, the idea is things will improve. 3 Link to post Share on other sites
Author victoria88 Posted May 12, 2017 Author Share Posted May 12, 2017 I am thinking about having a boyfriend. My question for the men is : Would you avoid having a relationship with a woman who is financially unstable? Does it matter how much I earn for a relationship? Women can give some advice too. Financially unstable means without permanent contract (only a temporary one). Thank you! Link to post Share on other sites
Author victoria88 Posted May 12, 2017 Author Share Posted May 12, 2017 (edited) I'm a woman. I'd date you.... Sorry, I would date a man only (no women). Edited May 12, 2017 by a LoveShack.org Moderator Link to post Share on other sites
introverted1 Posted May 12, 2017 Share Posted May 12, 2017 I am thinking about having a boyfriend. However I earn well but not much. My question for the men is : Would you avoid having a relationship with a women who is financially unstable? Does it matter how much I earn for a relationship? Women can give some advice too. Thank you! What does it mean to "earn well" but "not much," particularly in the context of being "financially unstable"? These three terms seems contradictory to me. Anyway... as a woman who dates men, I look for someone who is financially stable. For me, that means a partner who can afford his necessities and has money left over for savings and discretionary spending, as well as to contribute toward our joint activities. 5 Link to post Share on other sites
smackie9 Posted May 12, 2017 Share Posted May 12, 2017 It would depend how hot you were....if you were really hot, they wouldn't care. Attractiveness comes first with the majority of men. Who am I kidding....all men. 16 Link to post Share on other sites
SwordofFlame Posted May 12, 2017 Share Posted May 12, 2017 Man here. I would date you. Speaking specifically with regard to your financial situation, it's not a dealbreaker. Link to post Share on other sites
Titanll Posted May 12, 2017 Share Posted May 12, 2017 I have no concerns about another's financial situation. Obviously, if I felt that a relationship was based on my wealth, I would end that quickly. But as a man that is financially secure, I have no concerns about your wealth or earnings. When you say "I am thinking about having a boyfriend" it sounds like you are ordering a pizza. You do know that you just don't "have" one, right? 1 Link to post Share on other sites
CptInsano Posted May 12, 2017 Share Posted May 12, 2017 It would depend how hot you were....if you were really hot, they wouldn't care. Attractiveness comes first with the majority of men. Who am I kidding....all men. Not this one. I absolutely don't need certain women in my life, no matter how hot they are. Life becomes much easier after that realization, as there is no shortage of women who have their act together. 10 Link to post Share on other sites
NTV Posted May 12, 2017 Share Posted May 12, 2017 date? yes. If I had to hear about the financial situation all the time? No. Marry? Not on your life. 3 Link to post Share on other sites
kendahke Posted May 12, 2017 Share Posted May 12, 2017 (edited) I'd date you.... Sorry, I would date a man only (no women). I didn't mean you, per se, but since you were asking for input from both men and women, I rather took it for granted that I didn't have to spell that completely out. I don't date women, either, and I especially don't get into relationships with people whose finances are unstable. That's messy. But since we're talking about messy financial situations, what's the problem with your finances that you're asking strangers if they matter? Edited May 12, 2017 by kendahke 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Gr8fuln2020 Posted May 12, 2017 Share Posted May 12, 2017 It would depend how hot you were....if you were really hot, they wouldn't care. Attractiveness comes first with the majority of men. Who am I kidding....all men. Sorry smackie, but not all men. I try to read/look at profiles very carefully. The number of children, what kind of job, education, etc. I don't care how hot you are. If it looks to me that you don't have your crap together, I will not contact you nor will I date you. I have much too much to lose to be in a relationship with anyone that is financially irresponsible. OP, the short answer to your question is NO WAY I would date someone who is financially unstable. I know circumstances matter, but I have a choice and my choice is to continue finding ladies who are not going to be any more of an unnecessary burden to me or my family. I focus on the ladies who have professional jobs, higher education and a profile that indicates that these things may be true. As many under-educated and under-motivated women there are, there are also a few who have kept themselves in pretty good shape...financially. Link to post Share on other sites
William Posted May 12, 2017 Share Posted May 12, 2017 Folks, let's keep this from becoming a men/women have it harder thread and keep the focus on the OPs question which is if a prospective partners financial situation would matter in your decision to date them? ~T Link to post Share on other sites
Shining One Posted May 13, 2017 Share Posted May 13, 2017 Casual Dating: I don't care about her financial status. Committed Relationship: I care to some extent. She needs to be self-sufficient. I'm okay with handling a greater part of the costs of a relationship, within reason. Marriage: I care a lot. Marriage isn't on the table if we're not close to financial parity. Link to post Share on other sites
Popsicle Posted May 13, 2017 Share Posted May 13, 2017 (edited) To the OP: Bankrate.com said that 40% of women would not date a man with a bad credit score, and 32% of men would not date a woman with a bad credit score. That leaves 60% of women and 68% of men who don't care about it. Edited May 15, 2017 by a LoveShack.org Moderator response to deleted post ~T 2 Link to post Share on other sites
amaysngrace Posted May 13, 2017 Share Posted May 13, 2017 I think people tend to date within their own class and earning potential for the most part and yes most people will consider your financial status before entering a relationship even if they won't openly admit that. Link to post Share on other sites
Andy_K Posted May 13, 2017 Share Posted May 13, 2017 How much you earn isn't as important as how much you spend. Link to post Share on other sites
Author victoria88 Posted May 13, 2017 Author Share Posted May 13, 2017 Just to say thank you for your answers. Best wishes! Link to post Share on other sites
Author victoria88 Posted May 13, 2017 Author Share Posted May 13, 2017 I read in the forum here, that 2/3 of the relationships end for financial reasons. So, theoretically if I have a relationship with someone and let's say I stay with no job for year, he would dump me? I realize here that it depends on the man (some would stay with me, others not at all), but has this happened to anyone? Link to post Share on other sites
Popsicle Posted May 13, 2017 Share Posted May 13, 2017 Not me and I was unemployed a few times in my life. Maybe if I were dating a man who cared about that then they would have dumped me but they didn't care. You shouldn't really be worried about this, honestly. Just always be honest about your situation and men who care won't even talk to you and men who don't care will. Link to post Share on other sites
frigginlost Posted May 13, 2017 Share Posted May 13, 2017 I'm financially stable, own my home etc, and the very last thing that would ever come to my mind about dating or marriage to a woman would be her financial status. I dont give a crap about that... Link to post Share on other sites
d0nnivain Posted May 13, 2017 Share Posted May 13, 2017 I read in the forum here, that 2/3 of the relationships end for financial reasons. So, theoretically if I have a relationship with someone and let's say I stay with no job for year, he would dump me? I realize here that it depends on the man (some would stay with me, others not at all), but has this happened to anyone? I does depend on the man but it also depends on how you manage money. If you have no income, how do you pay your rent & eat? If you budgeted for it & can live on savings, that would be one thing. If you ran up credit card bills or expected your BF to support you, that is something else entirely. Link to post Share on other sites
Author victoria88 Posted May 13, 2017 Author Share Posted May 13, 2017 What about love? I believe it must be the main reason why 2 people have a relationship. Let me explain one thing: If I have a relationship and if he looses his job, this is not a reason for me to dump him... This is because I am cool. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
alphamale Posted May 13, 2017 Share Posted May 13, 2017 Would you avoid having a relationship with a women who is financially unstable? probably, but if i'm really attracted to her i might give it a go Link to post Share on other sites
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