LtDan95 Posted May 17, 2017 Share Posted May 17, 2017 (edited) So my girlfriend sent me a picture of her laying on the beach in her bikini in a sexy pose from over spring break and she looks really good. She wanted to post it on Instagram because she said she'd get so many likes if she did. Now, I didn't tell her not to post it because I'm not a controlling boyfriend, but she just decided not to post it anyway. I'm honestly glad she didn't because in all honesty yeah it would have made me jealous, shoot me. Like I don't care about her wearing a bikini in front of guys because that's kinda psycho and I don't have that much jealousy issues haha. But her posting something on social media of her in a bikini is a bit different to me bc she's really just posting it for attention and likes. She's basically posting it to show off her half-naked body for everyone to see. She's a very pretty girl but it's like she tries to impress other guys for self-esteem boost and my compliments aren't good enough. The fact that she told me "I'd get so many likes" kinda bothers me too. I feel social media has messed with women's heads these days bc they think they need to look a certain way and post revealing pictures of themselves to make them feel better. It'll just bother me bc a lot of guys are going to comment and I feel that's secretly what she wants. Idk. Edited May 17, 2017 by LtDan95 1 Link to post Share on other sites
PegNosePete Posted May 17, 2017 Share Posted May 17, 2017 Yeah, it's kinda tacky and attention seeking to post things just to "get likes". Whether it's pics of your dinner or of your kid or of your body. And yeah posting pics of your body is generally what single people do. But then it's fairly moot though because she didn't actually do it? Maybe she was just seeing how you'd react? You didn't act controlling but instead showed confidence so I guess you passed the test. Link to post Share on other sites
mikeylo Posted May 17, 2017 Share Posted May 17, 2017 I would watch for further behavior before making any serious commitments. Attention seekers can turn your life upside down. Not worth it. Too much heartache. Link to post Share on other sites
Betrayed&Stayed Posted May 17, 2017 Share Posted May 17, 2017 So my girlfriend sent me a picture of her laying on the beach in her bikini in a sexy pose from over spring break and she looks really good. She wanted to post it on Instagram because she said she'd get so many likes if she did. Now, I didn't tell her not to post it because I'm not a controlling boyfriend, but she just decided not to post it anyway. I'm honestly glad she didn't because in all honesty yeah it would have made me jealous, shoot me. Like I don't care about her wearing a bikini in front of guys because that's kinda psycho and I don't have that much jealousy issues haha. But her posting something on social media of her in a bikini is a bit different to me bc she's really just posting it for attention and likes. She's basically posting it to show off her half-naked body for everyone to see. She's a very pretty girl but it's like she tries to impress other guys for self-esteem boost and my compliments aren't good enough. The fact that she told me "I'd get so many likes" kinda bothers me too. I feel social media has messed with women's heads these days bc they think they need to look a certain way and post revealing pictures of themselves to make them feel better. It'll just bother me bc a lot of guys are going to comment and I feel that's secretly what she wants. Idk. I'd be more concerned that she needs external validation so badly. That doesn't bode well for long-term romantic relationships. Link to post Share on other sites
GunslingerRoland Posted May 17, 2017 Share Posted May 17, 2017 Is it really that different wearing a sexy bikini at the beach to get attention vs. posting a picture of it on social media to get likes? Seems like the same thing to me, either way. Really if your gf works that hard for a great body, she's probably proud of it, and going to want to show it off to some degree. Link to post Share on other sites
somanymistakes Posted May 17, 2017 Share Posted May 17, 2017 Yeah, it's kinda tacky and attention seeking to post things just to "get likes". What's wrong with seeking a bit of attention once in a while? Don't most people appreciate having their posts liked? Link to post Share on other sites
preraph Posted May 17, 2017 Share Posted May 17, 2017 I agree with you that it's not great to post nude or seminude photos on social media for so many reasons, but it's not up to you. It's up to her. She obviously is an attention seeker, so that is something for you to decide whether you want to be with or not, but it's not anything you can change or should try to. Link to post Share on other sites
PegNosePete Posted May 18, 2017 Share Posted May 18, 2017 (edited) Is it really that different wearing a sexy bikini at the beach to get attention vs. posting a picture of it on social media to get likes? Yes in my opinion it is. Wearing it at the beach is normal, she's amongst other people who are doing the same, she's not interacting with any of them and there's nothing sexual about it. Posting it on social media she is inviting interaction and asking people to look at her body in a sexual manner. What's wrong with seeking a bit of attention once in a while? Don't most people appreciate having their posts liked? Absolutely. I post my holiday pics and other pics and of course I like it when people like/comment on them. However I don't post pics of my body parts and I don't post them with the deliberate intent of "like-farming". However the fact that she didn't post the pic even after OP effectively gave her permission (by not objecting) speaks volumes to me. I don't think she ever had the intention of posting it. She just told the OP she was going to, to gauge his reaction, to see if he would get angry, to see if he cared, etc. I'm not sure exactly what she was "testing" or whether he passed or failed. But I am sure it was a test, otherwise she would have just posted it. Edited May 18, 2017 by PegNosePete Link to post Share on other sites
Popsicle Posted May 18, 2017 Share Posted May 18, 2017 I just keep thinking about how Forest Gump says Lieutenant Dan's name. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Titanll Posted May 18, 2017 Share Posted May 18, 2017 Don't blame social media for her, or anyone's, desire for attention. I mean, on one hand, she's sort of gift wrapping the fact that she wants attention. Her ease with telling you that should be a big ole sign. Are you being insecure? Not in my opinion... 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Imajerk17 Posted May 18, 2017 Share Posted May 18, 2017 Our interpersonal relationships have all gotten sooo much better since Facebook and Instagram came along..... Said NO ONE EVER. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
somanymistakes Posted May 18, 2017 Share Posted May 18, 2017 but without facebook how would I stalk someone to be sure they logged in every day wait I may have just proved your point 1 Link to post Share on other sites
GunslingerRoland Posted May 18, 2017 Share Posted May 18, 2017 Yes in my opinion it is. Wearing it at the beach is normal, she's amongst other people who are doing the same, she's not interacting with any of them and there's nothing sexual about it. Posting it on social media she is inviting interaction and asking people to look at her body in a sexual manner. Why does the bikini exist? Is it for comfort? Is it for swimming? No it's for sexiness. Like much of women's fashion. Link to post Share on other sites
GunslingerRoland Posted May 18, 2017 Share Posted May 18, 2017 I just keep thinking about how Forest Gump says Lieutenant Dan's name. I thought it was just me. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
spiderowl Posted May 18, 2017 Share Posted May 18, 2017 Yes I can understand your concerns. If I was with a guy who did that, I'd feel he was more concerned about impressing other women than me. I think it's a natural response. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
somanymistakes Posted May 18, 2017 Share Posted May 18, 2017 Why does the bikini exist? Is it for comfort? Is it for swimming? No it's for sexiness. Like much of women's fashion. clarification: We are not doing it solely to make men want to have sex with us every single time we dress up, even if you do actually find our outfits sexy. we also simply enjoy looking nice because it makes us feel good about ourselves. Link to post Share on other sites
GunslingerRoland Posted May 18, 2017 Share Posted May 18, 2017 clarification: We are not doing it solely to make men want to have sex with us every single time we dress up, even if you do actually find our outfits sexy. we also simply enjoy looking nice because it makes us feel good about ourselves. Of course, but I'd say the same about a woman posting a sexy picture of herself on instagram. You aren't doing it to make every man want to have sex with you. Link to post Share on other sites
jjgitties Posted May 19, 2017 Share Posted May 19, 2017 yeah, i think you are being a little insecure. shes in a bikini. not naked, right? not in a little string thong? its just a bikini. what are you going to do if you go to the beach and guys look at her in her bikini? You going to start throwing punches? what she does with her social media accounts and posts on them is not something you can police. whether its a shot of her in a bikini or her puting her lips in a bathroom selfie. if she gets likes or people make fun of her.. its her problem sort of. Link to post Share on other sites
girlinNYC Posted May 19, 2017 Share Posted May 19, 2017 So my girlfriend sent me a picture of her laying on the beach in her bikini in a sexy pose from over spring break and she looks really good. She wanted to post it on Instagram because she said she'd get so many likes if she did. Now, I didn't tell her not to post it because I'm not a controlling boyfriend, but she just decided not to post it anyway. I'm honestly glad she didn't because in all honesty yeah it would have made me jealous, shoot me. Like I don't care about her wearing a bikini in front of guys because that's kinda psycho and I don't have that much jealousy issues haha. But her posting something on social media of her in a bikini is a bit different to me bc she's really just posting it for attention and likes. She's basically posting it to show off her half-naked body for everyone to see. She's a very pretty girl but it's like she tries to impress other guys for self-esteem boost and my compliments aren't good enough. The fact that she told me "I'd get so many likes" kinda bothers me too. I feel social media has messed with women's heads these days bc they think they need to look a certain way and post revealing pictures of themselves to make them feel better. It'll just bother me bc a lot of guys are going to comment and I feel that's secretly what she wants. Idk. As a girl I would say it's not a good sign. Taking a selfie is one thing, although she didn't end up posting it, talking about getting likes is a need for attention and validation through social media. Begs the question as to why she feels she wants Instagram likes. Link to post Share on other sites
jjgitties Posted May 19, 2017 Share Posted May 19, 2017 As a girl I would say it's not a good sign. Taking a selfie is one thing, although she didn't end up posting it, talking about getting likes is a need for attention and validation through social media. Begs the question as to why she feels she wants Instagram likes. You know what. I interact with a lot of young people in university. I like social media and like to use it like a tool. They seem to take it to a whole other level. I dont get it but I dont judge them for it. They are a different generation and they like getting likes on social media. Be it videos or instagram or whatever. Link to post Share on other sites
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