RedWind Posted June 3, 2017 Share Posted June 3, 2017 Just broken up with my gf 2 weeks ago. Reason being that she had huge fight with her sister over something that was not related to me, but end up she spilled up everything to her sister and mother saying that I forced her to remove her clothes. Before all these happened, she was furious about it and I was quick to apologize after that and never repeat it again. We were in my room and we were doing some intimate stuff inside. No intercourse just end up with hands caressing here and there. Back then I knew I wasn't crossing the boundaries as she told me no to intercourse so while she was doing something for me, I told her to remove her clothes so that I can appreciate her beauty and nothing more than that. After a while she went mad saying that I don't respect her because she was actually reluctant to remove her clothes which she felt that I was forcing her to do it. After hearing from her point of view, I did apologize and never ask for it again. We didn't break up because of that, but rather she had a huge fight with her sister saying humiliating things to her that she could not take it from her family while continue to be with me. These couple of weeks I have been struggling to think whether I should really give up or not because I couldn't get her to talk to me until this morning we talked a while. She kept telling me it's not the way it was before, and we should remain as friends. I said ok I can accept that and give her some more time to know me more and to think about it. I still love her and yet people say that if you love somebody you should not give up. And at the same time to see the person you love happy, you just need to let go. I'm struggling here right now and need somebody to open my mind. Thanks for reading. Link to post Share on other sites
Bearded Posted June 3, 2017 Share Posted June 3, 2017 Hmmmm; did you violate this girl? I'm kinda with the sister, you sicko. Ok - jokes aside... it seems to me only like this one got away, and that you should be very careful in going forward even if she agrees. She's accused you of sexual assault, basically. At at that point I don't think it's proper to discuss on a forum. Just saying, if you didn't do anything wrong... it might be a good time to exit. IMO. Paul Link to post Share on other sites
Ronnys93 Posted June 3, 2017 Share Posted June 3, 2017 How old are you two? Link to post Share on other sites
Author RedWind Posted June 3, 2017 Author Share Posted June 3, 2017 The sexual assault thing is not the main point. I'm thinking what I should do? We're both 28. Link to post Share on other sites
elaine567 Posted June 3, 2017 Share Posted June 3, 2017 She has told you very clearly she wants to be friends only. YOU have to respect her wishes. You apparently seem to think no means yes and if you push hard enough you can get her to change her mind. Not content to make her take her clothes off when she didn't want to do so, you are now wanting to force her to keep seeing you, when she has clearly told that she doesn't want that. Leave her alone. Link to post Share on other sites
Author RedWind Posted June 3, 2017 Author Share Posted June 3, 2017 I accept that we remain as friends for now. When I ask her "what you are saying is that you want me to give up?" she didn't give me the clear answer of yes or no. All she's saying now is that we can be friends for now. I do respect her wishes and told her clearly that my expectation right now is that we continue to chat and probably hang out some other time. She did not downright reject me. Link to post Share on other sites
Superchicken Posted June 3, 2017 Share Posted June 3, 2017 I still love her and yet people say that if you love somebody you should not give up. . There's also another thing people say. "If you love some one, set them free. If they come back to you, then they love you too" or some crappy lovee schmuckee thing like that. Man, I need a pain killer after writing that crap.. But, mate, you did the first mortal sin when it comes to women. You made her unconfutable in the worst way. You want to see beauty ?, look out the window at Dawn, and Sunset and watch the sun rise/set. You want a companion ?, then treat them like someone, not something. Don't pursue her, and give her distance, and time to think about what she wants to do. If there's anything left in her for you, she will come back to you, and hopefully work things out. Also, don't keep apologising, as she has heard you. Just give her space and time. Ted Link to post Share on other sites
Author RedWind Posted June 4, 2017 Author Share Posted June 4, 2017 Lesson learned. I don't think she wants to come back to me anymore. I made an apology way before the break up, but somehow it got resurfaced and held against me. What I need is a fullstop in this relationship which I've managed to get it. I'll move on from now and walk away. Thanks for the advice peeps. Link to post Share on other sites
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