Making a Relationship "LONG TERM"

[DancerEngineer]

She's not going to open up and tell you her feelings, at least not ones you'd like to hear about.

 

You've been an errand/handy boy, and now you're her sounding board for her grief over a gecko (condolences on the loss of your nephew, btw), among other things. Why did her week suck? Did she start her period too (check your app)?

 

Women with a romantic interest in a guy don't put all this crap on a man. You're her bff.

 

I have a feeling you're about to be invited to a memorial service. Ignore.

 

idk. lol I told her a couple weeks ago, don't ever call me the uncle. I am not interested in being it's uncle. No, I wont attend a memorial service.

[DancerEngineer]

-I'm NEVER going to ask her to hang out ever again.

-I'm NEVER going to initiate contact ever again.

-If she calls, ill return her calls later in a text with something along the lines of, "sorry i was out with a friend last night, what's up?", and if she calls right after I sen that text, I'll keep the conversation max of 3 mins and say hey i gotta to run. "

-If she text me, keep it short 2-3 text and say I gotta run.

-If she ask me to hang, ill tell her i'm busy and if she wants to see me, she needs to stop jerking me around, and it's super disrespectful how I have tried to make plans with her in the past, and she ignored it, and tell her i'm done with this spontaneous bull-****. And if she wants to see me, she needs to make plans with me.

 

-Finally: If she suddenly text me and tells me to come over and opens up to her feelings, then sure! I'll drop my pants and head right on over. But I doubt this will happen any time soon.

[DancerEngineer]

Girl #1 simply sounds like the type that gets off on guys treating her badly.

 

I really struggle to see how you have any respect for her. And ironically, it is disrespect that is increasing her interest level again.

 

Can't possibly ltr people like that. Questionable whether you should be answering the phone to her, either.

 

Watch how that increases her interest too

 

She doesn't even seem good quality for FWB, mate. It's a case of treating her badly, and just for sex. Maybe even a "hate F".

 

Sure you want people like that in your life? Wouldn't it be better just to block, and transcend such people?

 

Thanks, I need to see stuff like that to help me get over her.

[DancerEngineer]

She contacted me today and i kept it to 2 text messages short and told her i gotta run. Now just just text me and said, "Miss u."

 

WOW I had no idea it would come that fast. Still trying to figure out what to say.

[MidwestUSA]

She contacted me today and i kept it to 2 text messages short and told her i gotta run. Now just just text me and said, "Miss u."

 

WOW I had no idea it would come that fast. Still trying to figure out what to say.

 

 

Did she say 'I've taken you out of the friendzone'?

 

Did she say 'Come on over and get laid'?

 

 

If the answer to both is 'no', then remain silent.

[DancerEngineer]

Did she say 'I've taken you out of the friendzone'?

 

Did she say 'Come on over and get laid'?

 

 

If the answer to both is 'no', then remain silent.

 

No of course not. Even if she decided in her mind she wanted to marry me, she wouldn't say that. That's silly. No one would say something like that...but I do have to be cautious as to her intentions. I made my intentions clear to her so many times, she knows my intentions.

 

Anyways here is what happened.

Blowing up my phone with pics of the memorial service for her Gecko!!!

You were right!!!!!!!!!!!

Her: "Miss u"

Me: "I miss you too, when you free to get together?"

Her: "I'm very free this week." -WTF. I NEVER thought those words would ever come out of her mouth!

Me: "How about tomorrow night or Thursday night i can drop my your place."

Her: "I can't do tomorrow, I am going out after dance tomorrow. So probably Thursday."

Me; "Well i don't want to do a maybe date, so if you are sure of your schedule, then maybe another time."

Her: "Well you sound busy, maybe after I get back from vacation."

Me: " Well if your not going to make plans with me, then I got to go. "

Her: "Well I'm free Thursday all day after dance."

Me: "ok, i'll drop by at 4pm then."

Her: "ok. " Sends me a bunch of pics about her gecko and then tells me how much she appreciated me helping her with her gecko."

Me: "Great see you then. Give the gecko my good words, I'm going to ed now. Night!"

Her: *Sends me more stuff about her gecko.*

I didn't reply back.

 

 

So you are very right. She could just force me into doing errands for her or force me in the friend zone or something. IDK.

But if something along those lines happens, I am simply going to tell her that she has been super disrespectful to me after how many times I have told her to not contact me if she is only interested in being friends. I'll pick up my stuff and just get in my car and leave.

So... yeah...I have no idea how this is going to turn out.... :/ Really hope she doesn't cancel on me at the last min or waste my time. I'm so tired of being disrespected by her. I kinda feel if nothing good happens, I'm just going to give up because none of this is worth the frustration she is giving me. I'll probably just tell her, it's over, and blocker her number. Like enough is enough. I can only take so much.

 

 

 

But funny how you predicted the memorial service. lol I wasn't expecting that, but I get it. She loved her gecko. I would do the same thing if my parrot died. :[

Edited July 12, 2017 by DancerEngineer

[vickyp]

I also sent this story to Coach Corey Wayne. I hope he answers it because this is a very unique case. normally after a girl gives the lets be friends speech and the guy says don't contact me unless you change your mind, the girl wont contact the guy until at LEAST 2 weeks or something has passed, but this was instantaneously. So I hope he reads it and makes a video on it. Because this entire relationship is one of a kind. i can't find any material on anything like this.

 

Has he contacted you yet?

[Imajerk17]

I also sent this story to Coach Corey Wayne. I hope he answers it because this is a very unique case. normally after a girl gives the lets be friends speech and the guy says don't contact me unless you change your mind, the girl wont contact the guy until at LEAST 2 weeks or something has passed, but this was instantaneously. So I hope he reads it and makes a video on it. Because this entire relationship is one of a kind. i can't find any material on anything like this.

 

There is hardly anything unusual about this story at all though: "Silly Girl Keeps Jerking Boy Around Because He Keeps Letting Her". In fact I think this type of story is very common indeed!

 

OP this is a 30,000-foot view: Are you aware of how frantic you come across in your posts? Most women can't take seriously a guy who doesn't have more emotional control than this.

 

At the moment this thread is really just going around in circles.

Edited July 12, 2017 by Imajerk17

[DancerEngineer]

Has he contacted you yet?

 

No, normally takes him a couple weeks if you aren't a paying customer and that doesn't guarantee he will pick your story.

[DancerEngineer]

There is hardly anything unusual about this story at all though: "Silly Girl Keeps Jerking Boy Around Because He Keeps Letting Her". In fact I think this type of story is very common indeed!

 

OP this is a 30,000-foot view: Are you aware of how frantic you come across in your posts? Most women can't take seriously a guy who doesn't have more emotional control than this.

 

At the moment this thread is really just going around in circles.

 

You don't have to read this then. I never claimed to be a dating expert. At first kinda wanted this deleted, but now I think it can be a solid source of learning. Maybe I might print it out if this doesn't work to study off of and learn from. And it also helps my anxiety because I get to vent a little even if half the people on here talk trash. Try to see something good, not the bad.

Edited July 13, 2017 by DancerEngineer

[Imajerk17]

You don't have to read this then. I never claimed to be a dating expert. At first kinda wanted this deleted, but now I think it can be a solid source of learning. Maybe I might print it out if this doesn't work to study off of and learn from. And it also helps my anxiety because I get to vent a little even if half the people on here talk trash. Try to see something good, not the bad.

The only way it will be a positive source of learning for you is if you actually start taking the mountain of advice you've already gotten, and start growing.

 

Right now you keep reacting to her silly tests and games as you look for the board (or wait on Corey Wayne to write you back ) to advise you on your next move. Just as you've been doing since the beginning of this thread. And it's just not working. And it never will work. Real progress will be when you start feeling IDGAF (google that) and stop with your reacting and overeacting.

Edited July 13, 2017 by Imajerk17

[guest569]

you believe that this woman is crazy and playing games, but you're exactly the same. It is laughable that you call this a learning experience. I hope that in time you will learn from it.

[DancerEngineer]

The only way it will be a positive source of learning for you is if you actually start taking the mountain of advice you've already gotten, and start growing.

 

Right now you keep reacting to her silly tests and games as you look for the board (or wait on Corey Wayne to write you back ) to advise you on your next move. Just as you've been doing since the beginning of this thread. And it's just not working. And it never will work. Real progress will be when you start feeling IDGAF (google that) and stop with your reacting and overeacting.

 

Then stop following this thread?

[DancerEngineer]

you believe that this woman is crazy and playing games, but you're exactly the same. It is laughable that you call this a learning experience. I hope that in time you will learn from it.

 

Not sure how I am playing games.

[DancerEngineer]

Well to my surprise something happened.

Last night I ended up getting dinner with her, and she wanted to pay for it, but I told her she didn't have to. I think she felt bad for everything. Then we went to her place and watched titanic and she started cuddling with me and then proceeded to hold my hand. Yes fingers interlocked. She also gave me a kiss on the lips on the way out.

When I was driving home, she sent me a really nice text thanking me for being so good to her.

 

I don't know what happened. I'm not assuming anything yet. I'm still holding my guards up.

 

Great....Now i'm missing her already.

I'll be honest, I was just really getting sick of all this and couldn't handle the stress of it, I was really close to just turning around and driving back home before I got to her house, but now that I saw her and how different her actions were, I see the girl I feel in love with.

 

Sadly she leaves to go to the east coast on Sunday, so i wont see her for a while as she doesn't gave back to the 30th, and I am going to Arizona and Greece the second week of August.

[Bastile]

we went to her place and watched titanic

 

Titanic... you smooth devil

 

Hope you didn't actually watch the movie though.

 

and she started cuddling with me and then proceeded to hold my hand. Yes fingers interlocked. She also gave me a kiss on the lips on the way out.

 

If that, and the part where the ship went down, were the highlights, you're doing it wrong, mate.

 

Come on now.

 

Sadly she leaves to go to the east coast on Sunday, so i wont see her for a while as she doesn't gave back to the 30th, and I am going to Arizona and Greece the second week of August.

 

 

Should have ****** her whilst you had the chance to.

 

Seriously think that you are a rat running her maze. She got a night of comfort out of you, and now you are likely expecting that as some sort of standard.

 

Don't. Expect more volatility with her. Remember that volatility and nonsense is the standard with that one.

 

One night of Titanic doesn't make up for having flaked on every date that you've tried to make with her.

[DancerEngineer]

Titanic... you smooth devil

 

Hope you didn't actually watch the movie though.

 

 

 

If that, and the part where the ship went down, were the highlights, you're doing it wrong, mate.

 

Come on now.

 

 

 

 

Should have ****** her whilst you had the chance to.

 

Seriously think that you are a rat running her maze. She got a night of comfort out of you, and now you are likely expecting that as some sort of standard.

 

Don't. Expect more volatility with her. Remember that volatility and nonsense is the standard with that one.

 

One night of Titanic doesn't make up for having flaked on every date that you've tried to make with her.

 

I should have what her whilst I had the chance. Its starred out. You mean have sex with her. She was on her period and I saw tampons in the bathroom. -_-

 

WTF. How is watching Titanic bad? ****. Why is it i can never do anything right.

 

So you are telling me you just think things are going to get worse from here? How and why? UGHHH!!!!!! What could I have done better other than have sex with her?!?! WTF! But I couldn't have sex with her. She was on her period and I'm not putting my dick where a bunch of blood is at. I even saw her tampons in the bathroom.

 

Keep in mind I said I have my guards up and I am not making any assumptions out of anything. I am still NOT pursuing her, and I haven't contacted her all day.

Edited July 15, 2017 by DancerEngineer

[TheTraveler]

Then I got up, and told her I can't do this just friends thing, and got out of her bed and started putting on my shoes. Then she jumped out of bed. Put on a candle, and pushed me to the ground and we had sex.

 

Then right before I got in my car to leave, I said “I’m not interested in just staying friends and ONLY CONTACT ME IF YOU WANT TO TAKE ME OUT OF THE FRIEND ZONE.” She looked like she was about to CRY! I know she ran into her house and started balling her eyes out.

 

When I was driving home she was blowing up my phone and obviously crying. She said stuff like, "Thanks for being the sweetest guy on earth to me." sends me all these sad face emoji cons.

 

She kept texting me all day Saturday, Sunday, and Monday. I didn’t reply back because it was so early that she was texting me back and I didn't feel replying to her non sense text was her taking me out of the friend zone. The text she was sending me were just random pics of her, what she was doing though out the day, telling me her gecko says hi, just non sense. That is why I didn't think I should have answered.

 

Then Monday night she sent me a text that said,

”I'm deleteing your number, so if you want to talk, you will have to text me.” I sent her a follow up text saying "maybe I didn't make myself clear, you need to stop contacting me you want to friend zone me, and contact me if you want to go out, or talk it out, and told her I really do care about her and I would love to see her!.. She hasn’t contacted me since….....

 

This is legit face palm.

 

She has sex with you, then you go off about the friends nonsense when you leave and about to make her cry. Then you ignored her texts for days?

 

The Coach and I shall laugh and shake our heads.

 

damn

[Bastile]

I thought you were "tracking her periods" on some sort of app?

 

Then what happened to only "hanging out and hooking up" (the Corey Wayne mantra)?

 

I'm not saying things will get worse, I'm saying that it's going to be the same old same old - none of the dynamics have changed. Nor are they changing.

 

I'm going to tap out on this one.

 

I strongly suggest that you keep spinning plates, and don't allow her to pull you back in.

[TheTraveler]

I should have what her whilst I had the chance. Its starred out. You mean have sex with her. She was on her period and I saw tampons in the bathroom. -_-

 

WTF. How is watching Titanic bad? ****. Why is it i can never do anything right.

 

So you are telling me you just think things are going to get worse from here? How and why? UGHHH!!!!!! What could I have done better other than have sex with her?!?! WTF! But I couldn't have sex with her. She was on her period and I'm not putting my dick where a bunch of blood is at. I even saw her tampons in the bathroom.

 

Keep in mind I said I have my guards up and I am not making any assumptions out of anything. I am still NOT pursuing her, and I haven't contacted her all day.

 

Get you red wings since you're new to sex

 

This rubber band relationship doesn't work man...I'd move on and definitely date others if you're not already

[DancerEngineer]

I thought you were "tracking her periods" on some sort of app?

 

Then what happened to only "hanging out and hooking up" (the Corey Wayne mantra)?

 

I'm not saying things will get worse, I'm saying that it's going to be the same old same old - none of the dynamics have changed. Nor are they changing.

 

I'm going to tap out on this one.

 

I strongly suggest that you keep spinning plates, and don't allow her to pull you back in.

 

I am, and she flat out told me she was on her period. And then I saw tampons in the bathroom. It's just an app. It isn't always accurate, but she flat out told me.

 

I said I am not pursuing her any more. Isn't that what everyone has been telling me to do?

[DancerEngineer]

This is legit face palm.

 

She has sex with you, then you go off about the friends nonsense when you leave and about to make her cry. Then you ignored her texts for days?

 

The Coach and I shall laugh and shake our heads.

 

damn

 

*face palm back*

 

Dude. wtf. EVERYONE on this thread was telling me to continue to ignore her text. She wasn't saying anything along the lines of meeting up. If you read my entire thread, you will see she was texting me about nonsense that means absolutely nothing to try and keep me in the friend zone.

[DancerEngineer]

I thought you were "tracking her periods" on some sort of app?

 

Then what happened to only "hanging out and hooking up" (the Corey Wayne mantra)?

 

I'm not saying things will get worse, I'm saying that it's going to be the same old same old - none of the dynamics have changed. Nor are they changing.

 

I'm going to tap out on this one.

 

I strongly suggest that you keep spinning plates, and don't allow her to pull you back in.

 

What exactly am I doing wrong? Like seriously.

I am not pursuing and I am only talking to her for now when we hang out.

No phoneship, only a relationship.

I am aware I should have tried and have sex with her, but she was on her ****ing period and I am not sticking my dick in her when she has a ****ign tampon up there.

I haven't said a dam freaking word to her all day. How on earth am I pursuing?

 

The dynamics aren't changing? This was the first time she gave me her availability and set a definite date with me, and didn't bail.

This is the first time she offered to pay for dinner.

She flat out told me last week(the week I wasn't talking to her) was nothing but pure hell, and she cried all week long.

She went from telling me, Lets just be friends, to well you know what happened last night. Before I left her house, she went up to me and gave me a solid long hug for about 15-20 mins long on the couch squeezing me.

 

Things haven't changed? I'm not trying to argue, I am trying to see your point of view?

[TheTraveler]

*face palm back*

 

Dude. wtf. EVERYONE on this thread was telling me to continue to ignore her text. She wasn't saying anything along the lines of meeting up. If you read my entire thread, you will see she was texting me about nonsense that means absolutely nothing to try and keep me in the friend zone.

 

If you're doing the Coach route

 

#1. You just had sex, left, and tossed the relationship status out again otw out the door. That's a big no no

 

#2. Ignoring women for days is not good man. You're clearly angry and she picked up on it, hence the deleting the phone number comment. You're suppose to respond and set the next date after having sex with her

 

#3. Hang out, have fun, and hookup.

 

You'll learn this with more experience.

 

From what little I have read you should be setting new dates with new women. And this relationship doesn't have long-term wheels.

 

You want a long-term relationship right? Move onto the next and chalk this up as a learning experience.

[Bastile]

I am, and she flat out told me she was on her period. And then I saw tampons in the bathroom. It's just an app. It isn't always accurate, but she flat out told me.

 

I said I am not pursuing her any more. Isn't that what everyone has been telling me to do?

 

Then it'll have been a disappointing night where you couldn't get past LMR.

 

Not very good behaviour from a plate is it?

 

Things haven't changed? I'm not trying to argue, I am trying to see your point of view?

 

Nope. She's still leading you by the nose. You're still trying to wife her up, or whatever.

 

You said that you were going to do that Corey Wayne mantra of "hang out and hook up", but you settle for Titanic and hand holding.

 

And you are actually over the moon with that.

 

Want me to give you an example of a movie night? I told a girl to come around mine with whatever film she wanted, and some drink that she preferred. I would deal with the food and my own alcohol.

 

She brought Ice Age 2 or 5 or 25. Whatever. All I remember is this little weasel running through mountains, then we were kissing. Then we were f***ing. Eventually to the sounds of the screensaver of a walrus making strange noises... which was weird.

 

This is normal. And I wonder if you have good male friends to tell you exactly what a movie night with your girl should be. Especially in the honey-moon period.

 

Watching Titanic, holding hands, is just a bit feminine mate.

 

That's what she probably preferred, because she is turning you into what's known as her "cuddle b*tch". She had you cleaning her iguana, sleeping in guest rooms, and now promoted to watching chick flicks.

 

Be more goal oriented. It'll help you cut through her push/pull nonsense.

Edited July 15, 2017 by Bastile