shamen Posted August 4, 2005 Share Posted August 4, 2005 I'm such a dork... ended up kissing a good friend of mine a couple of weeks ago. Told him all about why we couldn't date each other and ended up making out with him anyway when I drank too much. (Gack, feel like I'm in HS or college!) So, more recently, I ended up spending the night with him, fooled around, no sex. We both talked about why this would be such a bad time for the two of us to date, we're both going through kind of a rough time right now. It's funny, but now I can't help but think that this'll end up just fine. I don't usually end up dating or even hanging out with my guy friends, as the last time I did it turned into this big nasty drama. We barely talk now... Regardless, I'm kind of happy about this situation as I think this might turn out to be just what I needed. Don't have to worry about him becoming my beau, as I'm really not ready for all that. Neither is he. But, I'm still happy that it happened and I know that we'll have some fun in the future. For once I can't help but think that ALPHA may be right, not all people of the opposite sex can be just your friend. I'm usually such an advocate for opposite sex friendships. I do have lots of guy friends, but now here I am. Too funny! Link to post Share on other sites
Zephyr45 Posted August 5, 2005 Share Posted August 5, 2005 You both talked about why you should not date, and then you both decided to fool around? I would have expected the feelings to be a little lopsided for that to happen - where one person wants it and the other just slips up. Unless it was really more alcohol induced on both of your parts? I'd figure both of you are making excuses and rationalizing why you shouldn't be dating. If you're good enough to be good friends, your good enough to be lovers, provided there is attraction and chemistry in that department. All in my humble opinion anyway. By the way, what does FWB stand for? I'm new to these 'relationship' message boards and that's an acronym that I just can't seem to figure out on my own. Link to post Share on other sites
fundamental Posted August 5, 2005 Share Posted August 5, 2005 Originally posted by Zephyr45 By the way, what does FWB stand for? I'm new to these 'relationship' message boards and that's an acronym that I just can't seem to figure out on my own. FWB = Friends With Benefits = Friends having sex or fooling around without the committment ....it's still type of relationship. Link to post Share on other sites
Author shamen Posted August 6, 2005 Author Share Posted August 6, 2005 Originally posted by Zephyr45 You both talked about why you should not date, and then you both decided to fool around? I would have expected the feelings to be a little lopsided for that to happen - where one person wants it and the other just slips up. Unless it was really more alcohol induced on both of your parts? I'd figure both of you are making excuses and rationalizing why you shouldn't be dating. If you're good enough to be good friends, your good enough to be lovers, provided there is attraction and chemistry in that department. All in my humble opinion anyway. By the way, what does FWB stand for? I'm new to these 'relationship' message boards and that's an acronym that I just can't seem to figure out on my own. Yes, we both talked about why we shouldn't date. Yes, then we fooled around. It's been going on for a few weeks now. I haven't ever had a FWB relationship with anyone before, but somehow at this point in my life, it's what'll be easy. Don't want to deal with any major drama. And yes, he's absolutely wrong for me (read: drinks too much, stays up too late on a regular basis, blah blah blah), but he'll be a fun distraction. Attraction and chemistry, yes. Possibility of a long term relationship, absolutely NOT. We're both very aware of this. The whole thing started because of alcohol, yes, and it'll probably continue in the same vein. Originally posted by fundamental FWB = Friends With Benefits = Friends having sex or fooling around without the committment ....it's still type of relationship. OK, maybe it's a type of relationship. But one with no strings attached. We hook up when we do. We don't when we don't, not a big deal. Link to post Share on other sites
fundamental Posted August 6, 2005 Share Posted August 6, 2005 Originally posted by shamen OK, maybe it's a type of relationship. But one with no strings attached. We hook up when we do. We don't when we don't, not a big deal. Yeah no strings, until someone develops an attachment. Link to post Share on other sites
Author shamen Posted August 6, 2005 Author Share Posted August 6, 2005 True, fundamental, there is always this possibility, but I'm hoping that it stays chill. I'm sure that he does too. It's almost out of convenience right now. Neither of us really wants to date anyone. When I'm ready to start dating again, I'll have no qualms about telling him that I'm doing so. When it gets to be time to have sex with the new person, the FWBs thing will be over. I'm sure that he'll do the same. He's told me that he's not good at monogamy, which is fine. I don't plan on being monogamous to him, as in, I don't feel tied. I'm not actively out there trying to hook up or anything, it's just that if a nice guy asks me out, I'm certainly not going to feel like I've got to say no. Usually I'm into serial monogamy, but since he's not a good bf candidate, no point in it, ya know? Seriously, this guy would be a worse bf for me than my last long term bf. I am taking this for what it's worth. Fun. Link to post Share on other sites
clynn Posted August 7, 2005 Share Posted August 7, 2005 Yay! Sounds like you're having some fuuuuuunnnnnnnnnn! yippeee! I could use a little of that low commitment friendly fun! Link to post Share on other sites
Author shamen Posted August 7, 2005 Author Share Posted August 7, 2005 Originally posted by clynn Yay! Sounds like you're having some fuuuuuunnnnnnnnnn! yippeee! I could use a little of that low commitment friendly fun! It's been years since I've had any kind of a tryst with a guy where the rules have been set out at the beginning. It's nice, especially since I'm still not really totally over the long term ex, ya know? And the fooling around has been H-O-T. Good luck on finding some! Link to post Share on other sites
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