Do married men who cheat usually choose a younger women?

[What-2-Do]

I went with a younger woman. 17 years younger than I am to be exact.

 

Reason: She's SUPER HOTT!!!! Fun as hell, open minded, way more spontaneous, and full of life.

[Sweetfish]

Stay at home dads exist and have happy marriages. Not all of them. Not all stay-at-home moms have happy marriages, either.

 

Men without degrees and careers and money still get married.

 

Men marry men. Women marry women. Women who are totally focused on their careers and do not do household stuff need someone else to help out with that side of things.

 

Women earn more than men in 40% of heterosexual marriages in the US, apparently? It does lead to an increased chance of cheating/divorce because, yes, some people get upset about it. But not all of them, and it's getting better over time as attitudes change. The more support we provide for people in those situations, the more we say that yes, it IS okay, the better people manage to get along.

 

 

As for why a degree or a career or money even matters - to some extent, the degree and the career represent personality. I have no interest in entangling myself with a high-powered businessman, he'd probably be too busy to spend time with me anyway. Someone with a quirky degree and a hobby business that he's passionate about, though, is probably interesting. That's all theoretical, of course, as it would really depend on the individual. The money, I don't care, unless someone's in debt for bad reasons because that's personality again.

 

So what stay at home dads exist? What percentage is that? A fraction?

 

And yes men without careers, money, and degree get married... without the career or money they have to settle for less because an attractive woman knows with her sexuality alone she can aquire a better man. Yes, attractive women date dead beat or abusive men and only and usually because they are in a struggle to change him or a continous cycle to get his approval.

 

40% of women are earning more based on what figures? Women still hold 75% of the purchasing power and men create 75% of the taxes going into the united states and the more women out earn men and out degree men you will see more single women because women hardly date down.

 

This is a proven fact. African american women are feeling this pinch the most here and the proof in this point. Black women with degree will not marry black men simply because there are not enough with degree to supplement the requirements they seek.

 

Men perfer looks over your income or degree and this is why women buy the lastest creams and water proof this and wear 5 layers of "that" because they fear the fade of the youth and the power of gravity.

 

That is the harsh reality. Not all guys are like this.. but i would agree no man wants to walk into a Hooters, stripclub, watch cheerleaders who are pushing over the edge of 45 and no women wants to see a 21 year old James Bond.

 

No amount of power or wealth will make a man biologically attracted to a female. If anything this will make him less attracted. You will rob him of his place as a provider and insecurity may fill his head and heart and he will seek a female that makes him feel like a "man" or of ones comes along its a risk game and this is where mid life crisis get triggered.

 

The feminist agenda gave you some crazy idea men and women are on a equal playing field in the laws of attractions. Age for age. Money for money. Weight for weight.

[somanymistakes]

Don't take my word for it, google for studies on women earning more than their husbands. The figures I've seen come from the Bureau of Labor Studies. As I mentioned, the same study will also show that there is a slight decrease in happiness and increase in chance of the male partner cheating, in these circumstances, so it's not like I'm making up some happy fluffy all-is-well study to mislead you.

 

As society changes, as ACCEPTANCE changes, these numbers change. Men are unhappy being out-earned partly because they are surrounded by people yelling at them that they should feel unhappy, that they should feel emasculated, that they should feel resentful. A heck of a lot of what people think is "biological" is actually social. Not 100%, never 100%, but it's ridiculous how many people think that one thing or another is an evolutionary mandate when it's just a quirk of a particular culture at a particular point in time.

 

I don't know why you continue to push an agenda that actively hurts you.

 

... and plenty of women want to see a hot young male lead. Have you asked them? Bond films aren't even AIMED at women.

[Chilli]

Yes I would say they most often cheat with a younger woman. TBH though, lately I'm noticing married women are mostly cheating with younger men also.

 

 

Yeah exactly, in the divorce forum l was in for two years after mine there were just as many women that left for a younger guy as there were hubbies that left for a younger women and it's been going on for years.

But as for the manipulation idea ahhh, do women go after a younger guy to manipulate him easier , ummm, me thinks ahhh, nope, that's not quite it.

Haven't met too many guys interested in manipulating anyone, most just want somebody sexy and fun.

Edited June 27, 2017 by Chilli

[stillafool]

Young women marry old men for money but what has been going on for decades they couldn't wait for him to go out of town so the hot pool boy can come over to give them the sex they crave.

[Miss Peach]

I've had several married men try to start affairs with me. I never went for it but they were all my age or older. They typically hit on me when I had a BF. Oddly no one tried when I was married. In half of the circumstances I was in better financial shape then them so it wasn't anything to do with money/power stereotypes.

[wmacbride]

Young women marry old men for money but what has been going on for decades they couldn't wait for him to go out of town so the hot pool boy can come over to give them the sex they crave.

 

Sounds like that old Eagles song" Lyin' Eyes".

[Sweetfish]

Young women marry old men for money but what has been going on for decades they couldn't wait for him to go out of town so the hot pool boy can come over to give them the sex they crave.

 

 

Yeah, keep dreaming. Proven fact how society and media distorts things. Most mature average woman is not going to give up her sex to any ole dude.. let alone the pool boy. You've been watching too many Micheal J. Fox movies. Most women know if they want sex they can get it instantly.. so its a factor of supply and demand. In the case of most women the demand is a quality man with a deep connection.

 

Social acceptance does not change human desire. Gay marriage is legal.. it does not mean men will now desire men. If a man could date you and you could knock off 10 years he will desire you more... because that is a mans biology... this is not a case of what culture has to say about it. Beautiful hot women is what attracts men... it is what gives us the desire to ask you out...the surge in hormones..

 

You want to skip biology and flaunt your crows feet, saggy boobs, or wrinkled skin to young guys and think you have pull you as you did when you were younger.. majority of the time your just pulling an easy lay. Now if that is what you want thats fine.. but again that is why men and women are utimately different.

[wmacbride]

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Yeah, keep dreaming. Proven fact how society and media distorts things. Most mature average woman is not going to give up her sex to any ole dude.. let alone the pool boy. You've been watching too many Micheal J. Fox movies. Most women know if they want sex they can get it instantly.. so its a factor of supply and demand. In the case of most women the demand is a quality man with a deep connection.

 

Social acceptance does not change human desire. Gay marriage is legal.. it does not mean men will now desire men. If a man could date you and you could knock off 10 years he will desire you more... because that is a mans biology... this is not a case of what culture has to say about it. Beautiful hot women is what attracts men... it is what gives us the desire to ask you out...the surge in hormones..

 

You want to skip biology and flaunt your crows feet, saggy boobs, or wrinkled skin to young guys and think you have pull you as you did when you were younger.. majority of the time your just pulling an easy lay. Now if that is what you want thats fine.. but again that is why men and women are utimately different.

 

I have to say I don't agree.

 

The simple fact is culture does determine what men find attractive, same as women.

 

Here's a few examples.

 

Here, huge breasts are considered to be very sexy by a lot of men, so much so that some women will have surgery to enlarge their chest, even if it could kill them.

 

In some african countries, women's breasts are not considered sexual. they are seen as a utilitarian device ( to feed babies), and men aren't as attracted to them.

 

When it comes to weight, back in Henry the 8th's day, large women were considered beautiful so long as they were pale white but not "green" ( anemic), and had their hair elaborately coiffed.. A tanned, slender woman with long flowing hair would have been considered unattractive to many.

 

We see evidence of that today with models. Remember when Twiggy was considered attractive because of her skeletal form? She looked like a boy, but men wanted women who looked like her.

 

In some cultures ( usually those that are matriarchal and not patriarchal) older women are considered attractive because they have life experience.

 

At what point a person's own sense of what is attractive and what society tells them they should find attractive becomes a case of the tail wagging the dog, I don't know. I'm not a guy, and these observations could be way off.

[Sweetfish]

be

 

I have to say I don't agree.

 

The simple fact is culture does determine what men find attractive, same as women.

 

Here's a few examples.

 

Here, huge breasts are considered to be very sexy by a lot of men, so much so that some women will have surgery to enlarge their chest, even if it could kill them.

 

In some african countries, women's breasts are not considered sexual. they are seen as a utilitarian device ( to feed babies), and men aren't as attracted to them.

 

When it comes to weight, back in Henry the 8th's day, large women were considered beautiful so long as they were pale white but not "green" ( anemic), and had their hair elaborately coiffed.. A tanned, slender woman with long flowing hair would have been considered unattractive to many.

 

We see evidence of that today with models. Remember when Twiggy was considered attractive because of her skeletal form? She looked like a boy, but men wanted women who looked like her.

 

In some cultures ( usually those that are matriarchal and not patriarchal) older women are considered attractive because they have life experience.

 

At what point a person's own sense of what is attractive and what society tells them they should find attractive becomes a case of the tail wagging the dog, I don't know. I'm not a guy, and these observations could be way off.

 

 

In every instance you have not proven that a woman resources is an attractive trait for men and his sexual desire or at least need to produce are in her physical attributes. I would suspect the tribal African man who leads and acquires the most resources would be highly sough after individual.

 

 

Western men desire for sex and arousal for breast, butts, and etc is simply the result of society conditioning many men to idolize women. Sex and sexuality is a market place in western countries and the double edge sword of this market place is resources can always be acquired and youth and sexuality most often cannot. This is the dividing line in comparing men to women.

 

if you think sexuality isn't important to a man, cut off sex from him for 6 months or a year and let me know how that goes...inversely desperate men will hang around for a year or years just to get sex. Now if he has no sex drive now we are talking another ball game... but the average healthy man is not going to stick around with a woman that does not put out The game changer is if a child is involved. Women think that they can gain weight and cut off all their hair after getting a child and feel lock and loaded.

[wmacbride]

In every instance you have not proven that a woman resources is an attractive trait for men and his sexual desire or at least need to produce are in her physical attributes. I would suspect the tribal African man who leads and acquires the most resources would be highly sough after individual.

 

 

Western men desire for sex and arousal for breast, butts, and etc is simply the result of society conditioning many men to idolize women. Sex and sexuality is a market place in western countries and the double edge sword of this market place is resources can always be acquired and youth and sexuality most often cannot. This is the dividing line in comparing men to women.

 

if you think sexuality isn't important to a man, cut off sex from him for 6 months or a year and let me know how that goes...inversely desperate men will hang around for a year or years just to get sex. Now if he has no sex drive now we are talking another ball game... but the average healthy man is not going to stick around with a woman that does not put out The game changer is if a child is involved. Women think that they can gain weight and cut off all their hair after getting a child and feel lock and loaded.

 

 

You're getting it all mixed up.

 

I never said one word about sexuality not being important to a man. All I said was that what a person finds attractive is often culturally based. If is was purely biological, everyone would find the same body type, age group, etc. attractive.

 

They don't. Ask a hundred guys what they find attractive and you may get 100 different answers, all based on the person's individual "wiring" and life experiences. Men are not simply unevolved cave beasts, only capable of primitive thought. They are every bit as complex as women.

[Sweetfish]

You're getting it all mixed up.

 

I never said one word about sexuality not being important to a man. All I said was that what a person finds attractive is often culturally based. If is was purely biological, everyone would find the same body type, age group, etc. attractive.

 

They don't. Ask a hundred guys what they find attractive and you may get 100 different answers, all based on the person's individual "wiring" and life experiences. Men are not simply unevolved cave beasts, only capable of primitive thought. They are every bit as complex as women.

 

I never stated and it would be foolish to think that every man is attracted to the same thing such as body type. I even stated that some men are gay and that would concluded that men do not always like the same thing.

 

Biologically a woman lips get red or darken when she is sexually aroused so she wears lips stick. Biologically we desire a symmetrical face so foundation is applied to level out the skin. Noses are corrected. Wrinkles are reduced. Eye liner to enhance her eyes. These are enhancements to carve out a younger version of her self or enhancement of her self. Some women do it and some women don't. Some women feel comfortable without a mask and some don't. Western society is a sexual stock market. Age and sexuality is an important factor and is why women feel a desire to have or need a child before 30. When menopause kicks in (hell even after they have a child) some womens desire for sex dwindles down and some don't. sexuality and age are important factors and biology plays an important role and some how you guys are trying to pull it out of the equation.

 

A mans resources is a important function as is its a determination if her and her child or future child will be in comfort. This is biological and women actually become sexual attracted to the fact that a man has either resources and power. (IE: 50 shades) These resources and power can be acquired at any age and his looks nor weight do not change her comfortably or security.

 

This is why many women who chose to play a mans game at age 45+ is a losing game and men trying to play a woman's game at 18-21 can be a losing game in his future. Are there winners yes... but I would believe there are more losers than winners.

[minimariah]

I don't think Affairs are all about finding someone younger.

 

*someone BETTER - or that's what the OWs/OMs like to think.

 

i find your comment interesting because i assume that you don't actually KNOW this woman - you know ABOUT her through his point of view and through lots of out of context moments... yet you're analyzing her character and even when you do find a positive thing about her - it's not really a compliment to HER, it's a compliment to HIM: she must be clever because HE wouldn't choose someone dumb.

 

and I will never understand what does PREDICTABLE mean and why do people keep thinking it's a bad trait.

[SweetBabe83]

I am 16 years younger than the man who I have been sleeping with. And 20 younger than his wife. However I plan to stay invisible during a divorce as I do not want her to be hurt and try to wipe him oit for spite. As a woman I know that would really be hard on her.

 

He is so attentive to my needs all the time and very experienced. His wife yells at him and never wants sex. We both stay healthy and work out and I am sure he thinks I am hot too.

Edited August 6, 2017 by SweetBabe83

[purplesorrow]

I am 16 years younger than the man who I have been sleeping with. And 20 younger than his wife. However I plan to stay invisible during a divorce as I do not want her to be hurt and try to wipe him oit for spite. As a woman I know that would really be hard on her.

 

He is so attentive to my needs all the time and very experienced. His wife yells at him and never wants sex. We both stay healthy and work out and I am sure he thinks I am hot too.

 

What does he do to his wife? Or she just yelling at the poor dear for no reason at all?

[SweetBabe83]

What does he do to his wife? Or she just yelling at the poor dear for no reason at all?

 

She just yells for no reason. Passive aggressive behaviors most of the time. Extreme control over household issues like bank accounts and if he can spend money. She does not support his treatment for depression.

 

Mostly he chooses overtime shifts so he can sleep at the fire station VS at home.

[understand50]

In reply to your original question, married men and women cheat with who is available and willing. Age is not an issue.

[elaine567]

In reply to your original question, married men and women cheat with who is available and willing. Age is not an issue.

 

Yes that is what I was thinking too, it is a self selecting bunch, so maybe younger women, who tend to be more naive, immature, vulnerable, less empathetic, more ego driven, idealistic, gullible etc. are more susceptible to the charms of a MM.

[SweetBabe83]

Yes that is what I was thinking too, it is a self selecting bunch, so maybe younger women, who tend to be more naive, immature, vulnerable, less empathetic, more ego driven, idealistic, gullible etc. are more susceptible to the charms of a MM.

Not true for myself or my current BF. I get plenty of offers and I have turned them down. My BF has been approached by a lot of co workers and he declined them due to either they were ugly to him or acted crazy.

 

I decided to be with my bf because he made me feel safe and we share so many things in common so we can have fun or great conversations. Often we will not even have sex and just talk.

 

I also like thr older aspect because he is mature and settled in his self. And being older he has some old school courtship attributes which I always loved. Like putting my jacket on, holding doors, making sure I am first and alwayd apologizing if he misses my calls. He is also great in bed due to experience and I can do all the freaky things I like because being older he is open to trying nearly whatever as long as it is with me.

[diddilybop]

i have been the "other woman" twice. i was at least 10 years younger in both affairs and as others have mentioned, at the time, while i was physically in amazing shape and very sexual (more than their wives, at least), my self-esteem was in a bad place in terms of love and relationships. after plenty of therapy and working on myself, i'm done with that chapter in my life.

[Miss Spider]

I used to lurk a board called survivinginfidelity for years(this weirded my dad out :laugh:I've never been a betrayed or OW, or any xp in cheating, I'm just super fascinated by interpersonal relationships). I got really interesting info from there. MOST of the OW were younger. I think the most common age was early 30s. Maybe that is because the men were quite older (40s,50s).. still many years younger. Maybe because less likely to be drama in an affair(a lot were married themselves). I don't know. A few were even younger or a little older. HOWEVER, I found the men were more likely to leave their wife for the OW or not want reconciliation when the OW was older than the wife or near in age (ala Charles and Diana) ...Maybe because it's more of an emotional affair than purely sexual? Again, I don't know.

Edited August 10, 2017 by Cookiesandough

[elaine567]

HOWEVER, I found the men were more likely to leave their wife for the OW or not want reconciliation when the OW was older than the wife or near in age (ala Charles and Diana) ...Maybe because it's more of an emotional affair than purely sexual? Again, I don't know.

 

I guess more in common basically.

MM do have affairs for sex, but many men when they put their thinking caps on, realise that a LTR needs more than sex to keep it going.

The younger OW may be fun and exciting but that is maybe where the similarities end and most realise that real everyday life is not just one big sex or fun fest.

 

Pop culture references do not align, there is a tendency to get into a parent/child dynamic, there is a mismatch regarding life goals, she may want kids and he is finished with all of that ... etc.

[Miss Spider]

I guess more in common basically.

MM do have affairs for sex, but many men when they put their thinking caps on, realise that a LTR needs more than sex to keep it going.

The younger OW may be fun and exciting but that is maybe where the similarities end and most realise that real everyday life is not just one big sex or fun fest.

 

Pop culture references do not align, there is a tendency to get into a parent/child dynamic, there is a mismatch regarding life goals, she may want kids and he is finished with all of that ... etc.

 

Yeah, that's true. At least according to them, their WS 'cheated down' in terms of looks and everything else, but that's subjective I suppose and BS is not going to paint a pretty pic of OP. (Excerpt: "The 3 OW were all a lot older, and at least two are very overweight and not attractive at all") But in the rare event they do leave BS, they don't stay with the OP they left for very long, typically(it does happen).Kind of like an out of the fire into the flames/cheat stays a cheater. But I guess that's pretty common knowledge.

 

It's horrible and I got depressed looking at that forum so I stopped.