Loud_but_shy Posted June 24, 2017 Share Posted June 24, 2017 (edited) I am friends with a guy but getting mixed signals. He hints he wants to marry me & gets jealous if I talk to other guys. He is very generous with me but not other people & flirts/teases me but not other women. I'm having a birthday party soon but inviting selective people. But yesterday he was flirting with me & telling me how he misses me when I wasn't around several times (I was away for a week) & then after a bit of banter he got annoyed & said 'you know you are just a friend to me don't you? You should date so & so' the guy his talking about is an ex friend of mine who really fancied me. He keeps bringing him up, in fact he does ask about other guys I'm friends with a lot & asks if they're my boyfriend which does really wind me up. Later on he seemed to be feeling guilty & kept saying sorry & asked if he was still coming to my birthday party. I was angry & said sarcastically 'ask my husband so & so' & he said 'but I thought I was your husband' so I replied 'you could have been'. I don't understand his weird behaviour lately & I don't think I want him coming to my birthday. I don't want it turning into a silly game & I don't even understand if he likes me or not because his saying two totally opposite things. He is going to be really upset if he doesn't come to my birthday because his excited about coming Edited June 24, 2017 by Loud_but_shy Btw I didn't originally invite him to my party. He invited himself & kept asking to come Link to post Share on other sites
preraph Posted June 24, 2017 Share Posted June 24, 2017 He wants you or at least doesn't want anyone else to have you despite what he says trying to convince you otherwise and if you keep him around, he's going to block any men interested in you with or without you knowing. I would tell him he better sit this one out -- and in fact the rest of your life. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author Loud_but_shy Posted June 24, 2017 Author Share Posted June 24, 2017 (edited) Thanks for your reply. I have a strong feeling if he comes to my party his going to block men talking to me. If guys we know talks to me he cuts in the conversation, tells them to go away & glares at them really angry & jealous. Before I would have dated him if he asked me out but now I feel it might be drama. My best friend is a guy who has zero interest in me & visa versa. Would he accept that or create problems. Seems too much Edited June 24, 2017 by Loud_but_shy Link to post Share on other sites
basil67 Posted June 24, 2017 Share Posted June 24, 2017 If he keeps pushing to come, tell him exactly which of his behaviours make you wary of inviting him. Perhaps tell him that he can come but if he does any of that, you will be asking him to leave. It's time to put him in his place and have this behaviour stop once and for all. Link to post Share on other sites
preraph Posted June 24, 2017 Share Posted June 24, 2017 Thanks for your reply. I have a strong feeling if he comes to my party his going to block men talking to me. If guys we know talks to me he cuts in the conversation, tells them to go away & glares at them really angry & jealous. Before I would have dated him if he asked me out but now I feel it might be drama. My best friend is a guy who has zero interest in me & visa versa. Would he accept that or create problems. Seems too much Of course he is! He thinks if he eliminates everyone, you'll HAVE to be with him. Some guys don't understand that women have functioning brains and also aren't desperate enough to take whatever dregs they can get. Link to post Share on other sites
Mrin Posted June 25, 2017 Share Posted June 25, 2017 What is his culture? Where is he from? Link to post Share on other sites
ClassyTaste Posted June 28, 2017 Share Posted June 28, 2017 Hi. It sounds like you both like each other and are playing games. Tell him flat out that you expect him to be straight forward and honest with you, without any silly games and passive aggressive remark. If not, you are not going to engage with him further. Link to post Share on other sites
d0nnivain Posted June 28, 2017 Share Posted June 28, 2017 I am friends with a guy but getting mixed signals. I don't think I want him coming to my birthday. I don't want it turning into a silly game & I don't even understand if he likes me or not because his saying two totally opposite things. He is going to be really upset if he doesn't come to my birthday because his excited about coming It's rather ungracious & inelegant to uninvited somebody to a party you already invited them to, even if he goaded you into the initial invitation. You are kind of stuck with him. Next time he mentions somebody that you should go out with or called another man "your husband" throw it back at him. Say something along the lines of I don't want to go out with [the other guy]. I date men who I fancy who actually have the guts to ask me out. I hate game playing. So what are you -- a game player or a man who asks for what he wants? Stare him down for a minute then flounce away. If he doesn't immediately give chase & ask you on a proper date, don't bother with him any more. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
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