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Is my wife hiding something?


suspiciousH

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My first thought would be to file a police report. If almost 100 miles were logged on my car while I was away, my first thought would be, what was my vehicle used for?

In the case that it was used in the commission of a crime, my behind would file a report the same as if it were stolen. Another poster asked who has keys? Who would take your vehicle without asking?

 

I agree with Mrs. John Adams, the idea that a spouse would take your car with no prior notice is strange and unlikely. Ask her.

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Jersey born raised

Timshel's explanation is the only one that makes sense. Your car was used in the commission of a crime.

 

Every once in awhile a potential BS appears on a board. Like you they go to extremes trying to find "who". They question their spouse regularly. End result: walk away spouse (usually WAW). The potential BS spends years in a dark self imposed prison knowing they where right just could not prove.

Edited by Jersey born raised
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But without damage to vehicle, how can one enter and drive it without the keys? And even if the criminal somehow had the keys, why would he/she return the car to the parking lot when it can be ditched in a more favorable location?

 

Being that I have to assume OP is not fabricating this story, the most plausible scenario is he was mistaken about the car's location and calculating the mileage. Why do I suggest this? Because it has happened to me before. I could have sworn I parked somewhere else when in fact I did not. This seems especially likely if the OP regularly parks at this location.

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OP will hopefully come back and put our whodunit at ease.

 

Onelov..parking his car in the same place daily would make him more a target than less.

Oh well, hoping SH comes back with a plausible explanation, along the lines of I forgot I drove to NB yesterday. :p

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OP will hopefully come back and put our whodunit at ease.

 

 

There is special electronic diagnostic equipment that allows complete control of all aspects of a newer car. Entry, alarm, ignition, etc. Recently some of these have fallen into the hands of criminals. This could have been used to allow criminals to have access to his car.

 

Perhaps SH could tell his wife he suspects foul play and would like to report it to the authorities to protect himself against having his car identified as one used in the commission of a crime, thus implicating him.

 

It would be interesting to see her reaction. She may have had nothing to do with it. If she did use the car, she would likely fess up, no?

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If she did, no, I wouldn't expect her to fess up because the behavior in itself would be bizarre and shady as...

 

Why he should ask, if this is true, would be to bring his world down to earth. I don't think that his wife absconded with his car when she had many opportunities to do so before.

 

OP knows his wife. He seems distressed to the point of posting and tracking. There are too many variables without any sound report.

 

I won't be an alibi or complicit and I do think the right thing would be to file a police report. It's logical.

 

Good luck SH but do exercise common sense. :)

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Mrs. John Adams

Or he has read one too many threads and has convinced himself his wife is cheating....

 

I am telling you... if my husband did all the crap this guy has done to prove I was cheating and I was innocent I would kick him to the curb...this man has gone to extreme measures to prove his wife is guilty... with no result.

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BluesPower

Tell you what... MJA and everyone that is condemning SH for checking up on his wife.

 

She is or has had an affair. Unless this OP is some kind of a nut job everything that he has concerns about are spot on for an affair.

 

Now, it could be an emotional affair and she is being really careful or she could be super careful with a PA. But either way that is what is going on.

 

If I am wrong I will start my own thread about my wrongness and jumping to conclusions.

 

But if OP is smart, he will stay the course. Eventually he will find proof of her affair.

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somanymistakes

Remember, if you die of old age decades after your frustrated spouse left you and you still haven't found anything, you just haven't looked hard enough!

 

Seriously there comes a point at which the suspicion is more damaging to the relationship than any mild flirtation that might have happened. A pure emotional affair that was never intended to be consummated is still bad because it's taking energy and sharing and trust away from the primary relationship, right? But this sort of behavior is ALSO taking all energy and trust away from the relationship.

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Mrs. John Adams
Tell you what... MJA and everyone that is condemning SH for checking up on his wife.

 

She is or has had an affair. Unless this OP is some kind of a nut job everything that he has concerns about are spot on for an affair.

 

Now, it could be an emotional affair and she is being really careful or she could be super careful with a PA. But either way that is what is going on.

 

If I am wrong I will start my own thread about my wrongness and jumping to conclusions.

 

But if OP is smart, he will stay the course. Eventually he will find proof of her affair.

 

No one is condemning him...

 

Blues...you so hope you are right that this guys life is going to fall apart... that his wife is cheating...that you can't even think the best scenario here is you are wrong

 

Wouldn't it be wonderful if you are wrong???? Wouldn't it be great if his wife is not cheating??? Isn't that the right and best answer here?

Is the best answer that his whole world is gong to come crashing down??

 

Good god

 

Have we become vultures around here? Waiting to prey on the weak?

 

Sick just sick

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SammySammy
Or he has read one too many threads and has convinced himself his wife is cheating....

 

I am telling you... if my husband did all the crap this guy has done to prove I was cheating and I was innocent I would kick him to the curb...this man has gone to extreme measures to prove his wife is guilty... with no result.

 

At this point, I'm rooting for the wife.

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Mrs. John Adams
At this point, I'm rooting for the wife.

 

Me too!!! I am hoping like hell she is a faithful wife

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Me thinks that if the wife is eventually found to have had an affair, there will be more than a few love shack posters committing suicide in the aftermath...:p

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Mrs. John Adams
Me thinks that if the wife is eventually found to have had an affair, there will be more than a few love shack posters committing suicide in the aftermath...:p

 

Well I believe in positive thinking so I am hoping and praying his wife is innocent.. and if she isn't innocent...that he decides quickly what he wants to do... he already has a plan in place so he won't need advice in how to proceed

 

i wont be committing suicide either way

 

But it is still to be determined which is the sad ending

 

those who are hoping it is an affair..and those who are hoping it isn't

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suspiciousH

GPS showed her going to the train station. I asked her. She said she took the car because she heard a strange noise (like bad wheel bearings) in hers. She ran errands. Slipped her mind to tell me. Whatever.

 

Anyway, reading the most recent posts I'm convinced that LS is half crazy. I'm done.

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GPS showed her going to the train station. I asked her. She said she took the car because she heard a strange noise (like bad wheel bearings) in hers. She ran errands. Slipped her mind to tell me. Whatever.

 

Anyway, reading the most recent posts I'm convinced that LS is half crazy. I'm done.

 

So true. The other half is not so bad though. Best of luck SH. I hope you find the answers you need.

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Just a Guy

Hi SispiciouH I guess I'm in the neutral camp. I have only one bit of advice for you for you since I think you are well equipped to handle whatever transpires. My advice would be to stay off LS till something concrete turns up as otherwise, people are going to wonder whether you are tilting at windmills like Don Quixote. When and if you have something substantial it would be well worth your while to report your findings and would also be of value to people struggling with their own problems of infidelity by their spouses. Warm wishes.

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troubadour

Anyway, reading the most recent posts I'm convinced that LS is half crazy. I'm done.

 

 

Good luck! I completely support your decision and hope that everything will turn out be fine.

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Anyway, reading the most recent posts I'm convinced that LS is half crazy. I'm done.

 

Do stop by once the dust settles and let us know how things turned out. Best of luck!

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No one is condemning him...

 

Blues...you so hope you are right that this guys life is going to fall apart... that his wife is cheating...that you can't even think the best scenario here is you are wrong

 

Wouldn't it be wonderful if you are wrong???? Wouldn't it be great if his wife is not cheating??? Isn't that the right and best answer here?

Is the best answer that his whole world is gong to come crashing down??

 

Good god

 

Have we become vultures around here? Waiting to prey on the weak?

 

Sick just sick

 

We can only go by what the OP tells us. I don't think anyone wants to see this marriage fall apart. With that said, it looks like she has had or is have some sort of affair. This is just going by what OP has related to us and experience.

 

Also, yes there are those that get off on others hurts. They stay around these forums taking it in like a drug. If mods could weed them out the better. I don't believe Blues is not one of them. I myself could care less about a cheating spouse, I will all ways pull for the BS. What ever is best for them. There is never a reason to cheat is why I look at it from this point.

 

For those that have cheated and were able to R, is your spouse still going through hell because of your actions? That is why I don't push R, unless the WS can prove they love the BS and the BS can forgive AND forget. Which is hardly ever the case.

Edited by usa1ah
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Mrs. John Adams
GPS showed her going to the train station. I asked her. She said she took the car because she heard a strange noise (like bad wheel bearings) in hers. She ran errands. Slipped her mind to tell me. Whatever.

 

Anyway, reading the most recent posts I'm convinced that LS is half crazy. I'm done.

 

How did she get to the train station? ...how long was she gone? Did you call the gargage where she took the car to get it fixed?

 

I mean THESE are concrete things you can find out and prove whether or not she is lying.

 

LS is not crazy...what you have here are folks who have experienced having their lives blown apart...and there are negative people and positive people in all walks of life....and when their lives are torn apart ...it effects who they are and how they look at things.

 

Many of us are hoping beyond hope that your wife is not cheating...it is like i told you before...

 

It sounds like you are trying to prove she is cheating...and i am hoping you are trying to prove she is innocent. If you are trying to prove she is cheating...everything she says and does will be slanted in that direction....and if you are trying to prove she is innocent.,..everything will be slanted in that direction...

 

and if you beleive she is guilty...why? Is there something in your marriage that you have not told us about...that is guiding you in this direction?

 

What I am trying to say is...I dont think everytone automatically jumps to the conclusion that their spouse is cheating.....right off the bat. I think many people go through denial...because you dont want your spouse to be capable of cheating. So I will admit...I am confused by your attitude of proving her guilt.

 

I have no dog in this fight....It wont affect my world either way....guilt or innocense...but man i sure hate to see your world torn apart..

 

Best of luck to you whatever happens

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Mrs. John Adams
We can only go by what the OP tells us. I don't think anyone wants to see this marriage fall apart. With that said, it looks like she has had or is have some sort of affair. This is just going by what OP has related to us and experience.

 

Also, yes there are those that get off on others hurts. They stay around these forums taking it in like a drug. If mods could weed them out the better. I don't believe Blues is not one of them. I myself could care less about a cheating spouse, I will all ways pull for the BS. What ever is best for them. There is never a reason to cheat is why I look at it from this point.

 

For those that have cheated and were able to R, is your spouse still going through hell because of your actions? That is why I don't push R, unless the WS can prove they love the BS and the BS can forgive AND forget. Which is hardly ever the case.

 

As a matter of fact...no... my husband is not going through hell becaseu of my actions...nor am i going through hell becaseu of his.

 

How do you prove love? By actions....how do you prove remorse? by actions

How do you prove respect? by actions.

 

Can you forgive? absolutley Can you forget? no Do you ever forget anthing bad that happenes in your life? Can you move past it to live life fully...can you have a great realtionship full of love and respect? yes you can

 

Do you think simply because a person chooses divorce...they forget?

 

When i say your life is changed forever...it is truth. But your life is changed by infidelity...regardless of divorce or reconciliation.

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GPS showed her going to the train station. I asked her. She said she took the car because she heard a strange noise (like bad wheel bearings) in hers. She ran errands. Slipped her mind to tell me. Whatever.

 

Anyway, reading the most recent posts I'm convinced that LS is half crazy. I'm done.

 

Why wouldn't she just take it in to be fixed?

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GPS showed her going to the train station. I asked her. She said she took the car because she heard a strange noise (like bad wheel bearings) in hers. She ran errands. Slipped her mind to tell me. Whatever.

 

Anyway, reading the most recent posts I'm convinced that LS is half crazy. I'm done.

 

Quite true. The problem is in determining which half is crazy, and which half isn't. Sometimes it's one side, sometimes its the other... Keep up your investigations - we'll be here if you need any advice. Good luck...

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I don't think that she's having a physical affair.

 

I think that her emotional affairs, and her lies, have deteriorated the trust. Hence your current behaviour.

 

She gaslighted you, and now you are losing it a bit.

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