Is my wife hiding something?

[Zona]

Nothing new on GPS, VAR, ActivTrak.

 

I'm kinda with lostgirl on this one. If she came up clean with all those, especially activeTrak, that would be enough for me.

 

Maybe check Activtrak over the period of a few more weeks, then call it good.

 

Not every woman has it in her to cheat. Having said that, it was good that you saw the FB chat and threw cold water on it. FB is a marriage wrecker, and even ethical/moral women can get sucked into stuff, especially if these a-holes can convince them that they just want to be "friends" and continue the contact over a long period of time. The longer the secretive contact goes on, the higher the risk of an EA, possibly leading to a PA.

[suspiciousH]

Man. I honestly feel bad for your wife. Not gonna lie- it doesn't sound like she's cheating. Even from your early posts I never got the feeling or impression that she was cheating. It honestly just sounds like you're a bit insecure and I promise I don't mean that in an offensive way. Maybe there's something else going on either with you, with her or the marriage that you're not seeing and you're just going with "she's cheating".

 

I think all this spying on your wife is wrong and it doesn't sound like she deserves this. Maybe you should put the prying and spying to a rest. If your wife finds out what you're doing and she's innocent (as I suspect she is), she's going to be extremely upset and rightfully so. You may not be able to recover from that. The level of snooping you're doing is unreal. All b/c of some old Facebook chat and "flirty" behavior? Just doesn't seem like enough to do all of this to your wife.

 

Again, I don't mean to offend you. I just feel that you really need to think about what you're doing and stop all of this before it blows up. It's almost as if you want to find something and won't stop until you do. The problem is that if she's not cheating, you'll never find anything so how far are you going to go?! If she were cheating, you would have something by now. Please try and let it go and talk to your wife! See what's going onwith her. Make sure you 2 are on the same page with regards to the marriage. Whatever is going on, I really don't think it's an affair.

 

Good luck!

 

Maybe.

 

Last night upon arriving at my car in the train station parking lot (I live in a major city) I noticed that the vehicle was not parked where I had left it, as evidenced by the printed parking receipt I had received in the early morning. Not only that but my car had been driven 99.3 miles that day (I track my mileage for tax purposes).

 

WTF??

 

Anyway, for better or for worse, I've become almost a PhD of LS and similar sites and it seems clear that WWs regularly go dark with their AP for a month or more and so I don't think it's unreasonable to continue with the plan to track her for two months.

[Zona]

Maybe.

 

Last night upon arriving at my car in the train station parking lot (I live in a major city) I noticed that the vehicle was not parked where I had left it, as evidenced by the printed parking receipt I had received in the early morning. Not only that but my car had been driven 99.3 miles that day (I track my mileage for tax purposes).

 

WTF??

 

Can you think of any innocent explanation for why your wife would need to take your car and drive it nearly 100 miles while you were gone?

 

How would she have traveled to the station without the GPS in her car picking it up?

[Poutrew]

Maybe.

 

Last night upon arriving at my car in the train station parking lot (I live in a major city) I noticed that the vehicle was not parked where I had left it, as evidenced by the printed parking receipt I had received in the early morning. Not only that but my car had been driven 99.3 miles that day (I track my mileage for tax purposes).

 

WTF??

 

 

So someone drove 49.65 miles away, and back with your car while it was parked at the train station and you were away on your trip? Yep, that is a pretty considerate car thief who would just borrow you car and return it to the same parking slot... Does you wife's car have a GPS hooked into it already? If so you will at least be able to see her getting to your car and going back home... but why would your dear wife want to use your car? Unless she knows hers is bugged and doesn't want to leave any tracks. In that case, perhaps she didn't use her car at all... A friend or a taxi would come into play then. But still, the question is why?

 

Friend, perhaps you have underestimated your wife's technical incompetence. Perhaps she knows what you are doing and this is her way of sending you a 'message'. If so, your wife will be much harder to catch...because you are dealing with a master. This is a chilling development. Are you completely sure that SHE hasn't key logged YOUR computer? If so, she could be reading your posts here and knows exactly what you are doing. To get definitive results, you may have to skip the stuff you are dong now and go straight to hiring a good PI...it has just become harder to a catch her.

[lostgirl87]

Maybe.

 

Last night upon arriving at my car in the train station parking lot (I live in a major city) I noticed that the vehicle was not parked where I had left it, as evidenced by the printed parking receipt I had received in the early morning. Not only that but my car had been driven 99.3 miles that day (I track my mileage for tax purposes).

 

WTF??

 

Anyway, for better or for worse, I've become almost a PhD of LS and similar sites and it seems clear that WWs regularly go dark with their AP for a month or more and so I don't think it's unreasonable to continue with the plan to track her for two months.

That's just odd! Why would your wife go to the train station, look for your car, drive 100 miles then park it back at the train station? Are you sure you didn't somehow invert some

Of the numbers when you last tracked the miles?

 

If she knew you were tracking her car, wouldn't she just have her AP meet her closer and then take a cab/uber? OR just taken an uber for her little trip? Why would she go and get your car to do that? That's just crazy!

 

Just straight up ask her about the car. She what she says and pay attention to her body language. It makes no sense to me that she would go and get your car parked at a train station to drive 100 miles to see her AP but I guess anything is possible. I still don't think she's having an affair.

 

Yes APs "go dark" sometimes but that's usually when they've been discovered or a spouse is obviously suspicious. And even then, with all the tracking you've been doing, something would've popped up b/c I doubt she knows the extent of your surveillance. But again, anything is possible. Just doesn't seem likely here.

[Marc878]

Maybe.

 

Last night upon arriving at my car in the train station parking lot (I live in a major city) I noticed that the vehicle was not parked where I had left it, as evidenced by the printed parking receipt I had received in the early morning. Not only that but my car had been driven 99.3 miles that day (I track my mileage for tax purposes).

 

WTF??

 

Anyway, for better or for worse, I've become almost a PhD of LS and similar sites and it seems clear that WWs regularly go dark with their AP for a month or more and so I don't think it's unreasonable to continue with the plan to track her for two months.

 

Who else has keys?

[understand50]

IT could also be that she went out and took a drive to clear her mind. I do this all the time, and there is nothing nefarious about it. Not everything, especially after you have come up with nothing is cheating. Also, I clear my phone regularly, as it does not have much space and I need to clear it from time to time. Mostly what we think is cheating, is not, or only in our minds. Unless you come up with something better, I am just not seeing it.

 

You may want to think about why you are going down this path, and what caused it as I think this is not allowing you to deal with other issues in your marriage. If you put as much time into your relationship as this, things would improve.

 

I wish you luck.....

[staggerlee71]

suspicious latest post is so much more interesting. I feel I have to know who why that car was driven and placed back. lol

 

just sayin

[Doorstopper]

I would not have even got in the car.

 

Call #1 to wife, If she says no she didn't take it

Call #2 to police

 

They must have cameras at the train station. But I also have to wonder since you're off by almost exactly 100 miles, could it be a recording error and the car was not moved? Or could one of your children have taken it?

 

If your wife is smart enough to know you are tracking her like a dog, she's smart enough to know you track mileage, would realize the car was moved, etc. etc. A teenager on the other hand ....

 

But honestly, If you did not call/tell your wife/family about this and/or did not call the police, you may be entering a state of paranoia and conspiracy theory regarding the possible affair, because you are not thinking logically.

[mikeylo]

This is strange ! Does your wife not have her own car? If not, then why did you park it in the lot and not have her drop you and later come and pick you up? If you have one car then how does she go around?

 

This is confusing.

[GoldenR]

Who looks at their mileage when they get out of their car?

[MickeyBill]

Who looks at their mileage when they get out of their car?

 

Some need to keep track for work or billing clients. A friend of mine does that and tracks each gas purchase/day/mileage. But he's an engineer so....

[Mrs. John Adams]

I keep track of my mileage for business however ... I write it down when I leave...and when I get home. There would be no reason for me to write it down before the trip is complete.

 

Writing down the mileage when arriving at the parking lot only to write the beginning mileage leaving the same parking lot to go back home makes no sense.

 

And I cannot imagine myself going to the airport to use my husbands truck while he is gone for the day or week.. without telling him... makes no sense.

If I needed to use his truck... I would change cars with him or I would drive him to the airport and drop him off and go back and pick him up.

 

If a wife was having an affair.. why would she catch a ride to the train station to pick up her husbands car to drive to the lover then take the car back knowing that the parking ticket has the parking number on it...and then catching a ride back home?

 

That too makes no sense.

[OneLov]

This is what I cannot understand: How is she smart enough to know you are tracking her car, but dumb enough to think you would not notice your car parked in an entirely different spot and almost 100 miles put on the vehicle that you keep track of for work? It makes no sense.

 

I could go with multiple reasons why this theory makes no sense but how do you explain that one?

 

Can you explain how you were able to determine this based on the receipt you received? Was the car in a completely different lot? Does this train station issue parking receipts based on sections or rows?

 

As to the mileage, is it possible you made a math error or an error in computing the mileage? I'm only suggesting this because it seems like a much more likely scenario.

[MidwestUSA]

Who looks at their mileage when they get out of their car?

 

If you have suspicions, you do.

 

If you receive mileage reimbursement for work, you do.

 

And sometimes I just do it out of my OCD nature. Go figure. And I remember all six digits. Sometimes it's handy, other times it's just a curse.

[Mrs. John Adams]

Remember...this man has had spyware in place now for a while and has found absolutley nothing.

 

would you have reason to suspect that your wife would steal your car from a parking lot to drive to a lovers rendevous? What would even make you consider that as a possibility? Has she ever "borrowed" the car from this parking lot before? and if she did...did she tell you? I mean...who would even think of this?

 

But I tell you what...i think you should mention this to her and guage her reaction....Honey...it was wierd...my car was parked in the wrong spot at the parking lot and it had a 100 extra miles on it....

 

I dont know what the explanation is....for this "happening" but i aint buyin that the wife did it.

 

If he was out of town...loverboy could have come to the house....

[Timshel]

My first thought would be to file a police report. If almost 100 miles were logged on my car while I was away, my first thought would be, what was my vehicle used for?

In the case that it was used in the commission of a crime, my behind would file a report the same as if it were stolen. Another poster asked who has keys? Who would take your vehicle without asking?

 

I agree with Mrs. John Adams, the idea that a spouse would take your car with no prior notice is strange and unlikely. Ask her.

[Jersey born raised]

Timshel's explanation is the only one that makes sense. Your car was used in the commission of a crime.

 

Every once in awhile a potential BS appears on a board. Like you they go to extremes trying to find "who". They question their spouse regularly. End result: walk away spouse (usually WAW). The potential BS spends years in a dark self imposed prison knowing they where right just could not prove.

Edited July 8, 2017 by Jersey born raised

[OneLov]

But without damage to vehicle, how can one enter and drive it without the keys? And even if the criminal somehow had the keys, why would he/she return the car to the parking lot when it can be ditched in a more favorable location?

 

Being that I have to assume OP is not fabricating this story, the most plausible scenario is he was mistaken about the car's location and calculating the mileage. Why do I suggest this? Because it has happened to me before. I could have sworn I parked somewhere else when in fact I did not. This seems especially likely if the OP regularly parks at this location.

[Timshel]

OP will hopefully come back and put our whodunit at ease.

 

Onelov..parking his car in the same place daily would make him more a target than less.

Oh well, hoping SH comes back with a plausible explanation, along the lines of I forgot I drove to NB yesterday.

[Zona]

OP will hopefully come back and put our whodunit at ease.

 

 

There is special electronic diagnostic equipment that allows complete control of all aspects of a newer car. Entry, alarm, ignition, etc. Recently some of these have fallen into the hands of criminals. This could have been used to allow criminals to have access to his car.

 

Perhaps SH could tell his wife he suspects foul play and would like to report it to the authorities to protect himself against having his car identified as one used in the commission of a crime, thus implicating him.

 

It would be interesting to see her reaction. She may have had nothing to do with it. If she did use the car, she would likely fess up, no?

[Timshel]

If she did, no, I wouldn't expect her to fess up because the behavior in itself would be bizarre and shady as...

 

Why he should ask, if this is true, would be to bring his world down to earth. I don't think that his wife absconded with his car when she had many opportunities to do so before.

 

OP knows his wife. He seems distressed to the point of posting and tracking. There are too many variables without any sound report.

 

I won't be an alibi or complicit and I do think the right thing would be to file a police report. It's logical.

 

Good luck SH but do exercise common sense.

[Mrs. John Adams]

Or he has read one too many threads and has convinced himself his wife is cheating....

 

I am telling you... if my husband did all the crap this guy has done to prove I was cheating and I was innocent I would kick him to the curb...this man has gone to extreme measures to prove his wife is guilty... with no result.

[BluesPower]

Tell you what... MJA and everyone that is condemning SH for checking up on his wife.

 

She is or has had an affair. Unless this OP is some kind of a nut job everything that he has concerns about are spot on for an affair.

 

Now, it could be an emotional affair and she is being really careful or she could be super careful with a PA. But either way that is what is going on.

 

If I am wrong I will start my own thread about my wrongness and jumping to conclusions.

 

But if OP is smart, he will stay the course. Eventually he will find proof of her affair.

[somanymistakes]

Remember, if you die of old age decades after your frustrated spouse left you and you still haven't found anything, you just haven't looked hard enough!

 

Seriously there comes a point at which the suspicion is more damaging to the relationship than any mild flirtation that might have happened. A pure emotional affair that was never intended to be consummated is still bad because it's taking energy and sharing and trust away from the primary relationship, right? But this sort of behavior is ALSO taking all energy and trust away from the relationship.