the_entertainer1 Posted July 23, 2017 Share Posted July 23, 2017 How long was it (after meeting, or acknowledging feelings?) before you physically consummated your A? Was it as good as you'd imagined? How did you feel during/after? Link to post Share on other sites
somanymistakes Posted July 23, 2017 Share Posted July 23, 2017 Still haven't. Not going to (I hope. Some days it's hard to hang on to that thought.) Not unless he leaves her. I suppose there's also the option of if she decided that since she wasn't sleeping with him I might as well, but I can't imagine that would ever happen, and she'd have to tell me that to my face for me to believe it. Link to post Share on other sites
isolatedgothic Posted July 23, 2017 Share Posted July 23, 2017 Granted, we had dated 25 years before [no sex back then] and I had wanted him back for those past 25 years...and when we finally found each other again, he lied profusely about the state of his marriage. Classic, MM lies. I made him wait 2 months. He was openly upset that it didn't happen sooner, because his wife hadn't touched him in 15 years [yeah, right.] He pushed and pushed and I was afraid if I didn't give in, I'd lose him again. What a horrible mistake. As Cher says, if I could turn back time. I wish I had never, ever let him lay a hand on me till he was actually divorced and had gone through some counseling to work through his broken marriage. I will forever carry the pain of what I did, while he frolics off with the new girl. Link to post Share on other sites
MJJean Posted July 23, 2017 Share Posted July 23, 2017 Depends on the affair. Some of my affairs were ONS and some were with long time friends. Once attraction was acknowledged, usually between 24 hrs and a week to consummation. How the sex felt depended on the man. Each man is different. Some are more skilled than others. I gave AP's one shot. If the sex wasn't great, I didn't do it again. During I felt pleasure. After I felt good because I'd just had pleasurable sex. Link to post Share on other sites
lostgirl87 Posted July 23, 2017 Share Posted July 23, 2017 We met in January of that year, became friends and I guess openly admitted to having feelings for each other in March which is when I found out he was married. I tried to keep it as just friends for a while. We didn't have sex until 6 months later. The longest I've ever waited. Although we can all agree it was different t circumstances lol. It was better than I could have imagined b/c we were in love with each other. The feelings we have for each other are different from anything we have ever felt and that really does make sex better. Also, he and I are extremely sexual, kinky freaks so that helps too. I felt great, he did too. However it did complicate things. Feelings got deeper, jealousy really began to take its toll on both of us. We fought more. Maybe that all happened b/c we had been involved with each other for so long and not just bc we had sex. I think an affair that is bkth physical and emotional can get very complicated, very fast. I think the ones where it's clear that APs are only in it for fun and sex are easier to deal with. MM and I are still talking (haven't had sex with each other in months) despite 2 DDays (caused by me) and several more instances where he's been caught still speaking with me. That should let you know how complicated and difficult this could get. Take that as a warning lol. Link to post Share on other sites
misspalmy Posted July 23, 2017 Share Posted July 23, 2017 not long after i met him, but he was saying he love me and so on, playing mind games, ended after 4 years, 4 years wasted. Link to post Share on other sites
Doublegold Posted July 23, 2017 Share Posted July 23, 2017 Three months. As good as I imagined? Hadn't fantasized how it would be, or planned it. It happened between a whirlwind day/night in the city. It was fantastic, can still see it like a movie. Once we kissed it was all over for us. Best. Sex. Ever. After? Felt magical. We went out with my friend to meet some more of his friends. Had dinner at a great French/Vietnamese Restaurant. Then he went off with his friend and my friend and I went back to the W and ended up at a great nightclub and danced until dawn. MM called in the early am to drive out to an abandoned Estate on the Hudson--but I was just going to bed. And the rest is history 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Poppy47 Posted July 24, 2017 Share Posted July 24, 2017 It was three months. Yes, it was more than I had imagined or ever had before. I miss it because it continued to be terrific for many years. Poppy. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
cocorico Posted July 24, 2017 Share Posted July 24, 2017 How long was it (after meeting, or acknowledging feelings?) before you physically consummated your A? Was it as good as you'd imagined? How did you feel during/after? We met in a professional context, got to know each other superficially but nothing unprofessional happened. I spent more than a year checking him out at a distance, and then we met again (another professional context) and I made a move. That evening we consummated. Of course it was good. If it wasn't, I wouldn't have had anymore. During - exhilarated. After - shagged out. Pretty much what still goes down Link to post Share on other sites
MidnightBlue1980 Posted July 24, 2017 Share Posted July 24, 2017 How long was it (after meeting, or acknowledging feelings?) before you physically consummated your A? Was it as good as you'd imagined? How did you feel during/after? Knew him 2 years, it was 3 months after he told me he loved me and the 3rd time we went out together. He could not get it up, he had ED. He had blamed his wife but no, he has ED. He finally did get it up and I think came on my leg in about 5 seconds. So I would say, the experience was pretty disappointing. We tried 3 months later and it was about 10 seconds. That was it. How did I feel? Terrible. How did he feel? Happy as he had been looking for an A for 5 years. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
starswewillnavigate Posted July 24, 2017 Share Posted July 24, 2017 xMM - about a month or so after the A ended. Very disappointing as he had ED and PE, although lasted a bit longer than midnightblue's MM at 20 seconds. Link to post Share on other sites
Space Ritual Posted July 24, 2017 Share Posted July 24, 2017 Knew him 2 years, it was 3 months after he told me he loved me and the 3rd time we went out together. He could not get it up, he had ED. He had blamed his wife but no, he has ED. He finally did get it up and I think came on my leg in about 5 seconds. So I would say, the experience was pretty disappointing. We tried 3 months later and it was about 10 seconds. That was it. How did I feel? Terrible. How did he feel? Happy as he had been looking for an A for 5 years. That's gotta suck when you have such high expectations and end up with a 2 Pump Chump. Link to post Share on other sites
Chica80 Posted July 24, 2017 Share Posted July 24, 2017 A couple days. After acknowledging feelings. But had know eachother for some years. In the immediate aftermath amazing.....but then guilt the questions confusions etc. A couple days later. Link to post Share on other sites
somanymistakes Posted July 24, 2017 Share Posted July 24, 2017 Why are they so desperate to sleep with someone else if they... can't? Are they hoping it will be different with someone other than their wives? Link to post Share on other sites
starswewillnavigate Posted July 24, 2017 Share Posted July 24, 2017 Why are they so desperate to sleep with someone else if they... can't? Are they hoping it will be different with someone other than their wives? I think with my xMM this is the case. He was continually on the dating site we met on and I'm sure this is a continual problem for him to prove he can. Realises he can't, and moves onto the next girl. I don't think he would be doing this if he could perform with his wife. Link to post Share on other sites
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