Guys out there, answer me this.

[Steve51]

It is difficult to answer since I never knew if it was going to be a one night stand of the beginning of a relationship. The three times I knew it was just a one night stand, the girls were the ones doing the asking.

[alphamale]

I learned over many iterations that women are not always transparent about their relationship status.

 

isn't that the truth?

[road]

A man's confidence level controls how he asks a woman out.

 

Being a ONS or long term GF material does not impact him

as much.

 

As pointed out how a woman packages herself, dress, conduct,

gives off vibes if she is easy.

 

So if a woman is getting only low quality offers then she is

appearing to low class.

[Chilli]

l dunno , people take all this too far these days.

l've never been short of women and had gf's and then married my whole life since l was 12, there's not much to know, you see someone you like,you go gettem, if ya can.

 

That's about as complicated as that part of things needs to be.

Edited July 30, 2017 by Chilli

[girlinNYC]

l dunno , people take all this too far these days.

l've never been short of women and had gf's and then married my whole life since l was 12, there's not much to know, you see someone you like,you go gettem, if ya can.

 

That's about as complicated as that part of things needs to be.

 

It definitely is overcomplicated these days. Love is much harder to find.

[girlinNYC]

I can't speak for everyone, only myself. If I am not really interested in a girl, I can be smooth, funny, confident and charming. If I am really interested in her, really like her? Not so much. When talking to a girl I am not so interested in, it's easy to be charming. You have nothing to lose. If she doesn't dig you, oh well, on to the next girl. When talking with a girl I am really into, it's different because the stakes are higher. It's easier to say the wrong thing, or to just plain go blank when you're talking to her.

 

so you're saying a lot of guys, when talking to a girl they're into are more reserved? (evidently because stakes are higher?)

[girlinNYC]

A man's confidence level controls how he asks a woman out.

 

Being a ONS or long term GF material does not impact him

as much.

 

As pointed out how a woman packages herself, dress, conduct,

gives off vibes if she is easy.

 

So if a woman is getting only low quality offers then she is

appearing to low class.

 

In my case, I dress super conservatively (not like a nun) but very classily, especially in a work setting when I'm around the guy I like. I've always been reserved and articulate in our conversations too. According to your above statement, do you think he is intimidated or holding back because I'm not letting off a low class vibe?

[Chilli]

Nah it's not an intimidation thing , really smart women often get that idea too but it's not that at all.

Like l often joke ,if she's smarter than me cool , l don't care, she can do all the thinking haha.

And don't worry , a lot of classier guys will love you just the way you are, but a lot also like a pretty chilled a fun person too.

For you l guess just like anyone else , it's just about the person that suits you and vise verse.

[girlinNYC]

Nah it's not an intimidation thing , really smart women often get that idea too but it's not that at all.

Like l often joke ,if she's smarter than me cool , l don't care, she can do all the thinking haha.

And don't worry , a lot of classier guys will love you just the way you are, but a lot also like a pretty chilled a fun person too.

For you l guess just like anyone else , it's just about the person that suits you and vise verse.

 

Makes sense

My first instinct is to always let off a more conservative vibe even if I run the risk of looking uptight. I would rather be seen as that than be seen by someone I like as just a good time. I'm at an age in my 20's now where relationships are investments not just for fun.

He and I have had a laugh in a work setting so I don't believe he sees me as uptight but he respects me too, so I think it's tracking well in that department.

[The411]

Women know within 5 seconds if they are going to sleep with a guy. For men we are able to tell if a girl is ONS material, FWB material, relationship material or none of the above.

[Chilli]

l know in 5 seconds too.

Probably why date sites don't work for me because the second l meet them l know , so l've been through all that for nothing because had of it been RL l wouldn't have even approached them , not in that way anyway.

[Andy_K]

I can't speak for everyone, only myself. If I am not really interested in a girl, I can be smooth, funny, confident and charming. If I am really interested in her, really like her? Not so much. When talking to a girl I am not so interested in, it's easy to be charming. You have nothing to lose. If she doesn't dig you, oh well, on to the next girl. When talking with a girl I am really into, it's different because the stakes are higher. It's easier to say the wrong thing, or to just plain go blank when you're talking to her.

 

Exactly this. It's much easier to be yourself when you're in a situation where you don't have a whole lot invested. Then when you meet someone who seems a clear cut above the rest... it's all too easy to start overthinking things, second guessing yourself, and making mistakes you look back on with disbelief afterwards.