btcman Posted July 25, 2017 Share Posted July 25, 2017 My issue is I just finished my fellowship and have about $460,000 in student debt. I am just about to begin my first job as a surgeon and the pay is really great but I dont want to just buy a ring with that money. I need to pay down some of these loans. The reality is in a couple years once all my student loans are paid back and I've bought us a home I have no issue buying a ring. I found an incredible CZ ring online at what reviews have said is the best CZ place birkat elyon and their reviews are good. I was just curious how fake these rings look. Link to post Share on other sites
MuddyFootprints Posted July 25, 2017 Share Posted July 25, 2017 Diamonds are over-rated and I'm not sure how popular that 'diamond ring' look is anymore. There are so many other creative options for a unique, inexpensive ring. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Arieswoman Posted July 25, 2017 Share Posted July 25, 2017 (edited) I agree, cubic zirconas are naff IMO Edited July 25, 2017 by Arieswoman 1 Link to post Share on other sites
S2B Posted July 25, 2017 Share Posted July 25, 2017 (edited) Are you planning to inform the recipient that it's a cz? Why don't you wait to get engaged until you can afford a ring? Really, putting the ring as your priority after the house and students loans shows that your woman is low on your priority list. If you can't afford it - don't do it. Or just get a tattoo. Edited July 25, 2017 by S2B Link to post Share on other sites
Author btcman Posted July 25, 2017 Author Share Posted July 25, 2017 Wow geez. She knows and we discussed it, I told her we'd get married when I was all done and a working surgeon. I made decent money in fellowship, but now I make north of $400k on my first full time group work that begins sept 1. I can finally begin paying back this massive debt and buy us a home. The last few years as all my training wrapped up I barely made $50k a year and for New York City that's peanuts. We're moving to Los Angeles together for my first job and she said she would like to be engaged before we move. She's stuck by my for 5 years so I'm happy to oblige. I mean yes I can borrow $20k and finance a ring but I figure it's silly when we are finally beginning our lives $500k in debt thanks to costs to become a surgeon. She knows in 5 years upgrading won't be an issue and I told her as much but for now I feel like a very high quality cz is the best option assuming it doesn't look too fake. Link to post Share on other sites
MidwestUSA Posted July 25, 2017 Share Posted July 25, 2017 (edited) Google one word Moissanite You'll find a boatload of sites. A bit higher than CZ, but might be a compromise. Then you can still upgrade later. Good luck. Argh, I just designed this one, and now I want it. https://www.moissaniteco.com/round-forever-brilliant-moissanite-floral-accent-wedding-set-p-15031:39aa41ea80aa6561735599df05b63b01.html Edited July 25, 2017 by MidwestUSA 2 Link to post Share on other sites
PegNosePete Posted July 25, 2017 Share Posted July 25, 2017 (edited) Why not just go look at a few in a shop? If they look good to you, then who cares what anyone else thinks? Often the biggest difference is the ring they are embedded in - the CZ rings tend to be a lot cheaper. Also since CZ is cheap they tend to make the stones large, which is a dead giveaway that they aren't real, since a real diamond that size would be incredibly expensive. For the best realistic-looking CZ ring I would go for a good quality 18 carat white gold ring with a small stone. Personally I don't see the point buying a hugely expensive ring. The whole engagement ring industry is a scam, invented by the marketing division of a diamond company. https://www.theatlantic.com/international/archive/2015/02/how-an-ad-campaign-invented-the-diamond-engagement-ring/385376/ Edited July 25, 2017 by PegNosePete 2 Link to post Share on other sites
lucy_in_disguise Posted July 25, 2017 Share Posted July 25, 2017 Firstly, who cares? If she knows it's fake and doesn't have a problem with it, screw what other people think. Secondly, I agree that CZ looks fake because the stones tend to go overboard. If you want it to look like a diamond, go for something small. Third, have you consulted your fiancé on the type of ring she would like? As a matter of personal preference, I would never want an expensive ring, but would opt for either a simple band, a ring with small and inexpensive diamonds, or a different stone, over CZ. I would prefer something unique to something imitating an expensive traditional ring, but that's just me. There are a lot of great and more-affordable options, and I agree that diamonds are losing popularity anyway! Congrats on your decision to propose! Link to post Share on other sites
somanymistakes Posted July 25, 2017 Share Posted July 25, 2017 Consult her personal taste. She might be much more interested in a birthstone ring, or a band engraved with a romantic phrase, or all kinds of things. Don't buy a CZ and try to pass it off as a diamond, this will be a strong symbolic suggestion to her that you're willing to lie to her during your marriage... ... wait a second, I thought you said you'd been married for nearly a decade? http://www.loveshack.org/forums/romantic/marriage-life-partnerships/629530-bit-long-im-mad-my-friend-getting-engaged-not-telling-me-am-i-wrong 5 Link to post Share on other sites
BluEyeL Posted July 25, 2017 Share Posted July 25, 2017 My ring is a diamond but it was only $3000. Why is the choice between 20,000 and cubic zirconia. Does it have to be a big diamond, can't it be a smaller one? 1 Link to post Share on other sites
CautiouslyOptimistic Posted July 25, 2017 Share Posted July 25, 2017 Consult her personal taste. She might be much more interested in a birthstone ring, or a band engraved with a romantic phrase, or all kinds of things. Don't buy a CZ and try to pass it off as a diamond, this will be a strong symbolic suggestion to her that you're willing to lie to her during your marriage... ... wait a second, I thought you said you'd been married for nearly a decade? http://www.loveshack.org/forums/romantic/marriage-life-partnerships/629530-bit-long-im-mad-my-friend-getting-engaged-not-telling-me-am-i-wrong Maybe it's not an engagement ring? He didn't say in his original post that it was. Link to post Share on other sites
Lily blue Posted July 25, 2017 Share Posted July 25, 2017 Yes. No matter what they say about cz stones they look fake and I can tell right away and they GE dull over time and scratch so easy and loose shine if dirt and oil gets on the stone. They also grades just like diamond too. I do jewelry business but mostly I sell Moissanite. Moissanite stones are just like diamond and it test positive on diamond tester as diamond too and they look identical to diamond as well. You can buy very affordable moissanite rings. It depends on who sells but stone is created all the same and has same chemical, optical properties. I sell beautiful moissanite rings in different cuts, shape and color and are all under $700 Seriously, skip cz.....moissanite stones are just like diamond and even trained jewelers cannot tell and even if you tested on a diamond tester moissanite stones comes out as diamond so no one knows. So many women choose moissanite over diamond because it really look identical to diamond and can buy big stone at so cheap so why waste money on cz or even diamond? It last forever and never get dull over time. You can looked up online. Cz is worthless. 3 Link to post Share on other sites
Lily blue Posted July 25, 2017 Share Posted July 25, 2017 Oh, by the way I have real 3.00ct fancy yellow VVS2 round cut engagement ring but I bought 3.00 ct Emerald cut white Moissanite ring and I wear them as my engagement ring and I also have 2.50ct radiant cut fancy yellow moissanite ring and wear as engagement ring too....no one ever can tell. It looks identical side by side with real diamond and looks like I paid $45,000 but not lol 1 Link to post Share on other sites
angel.eyes Posted July 25, 2017 Share Posted July 25, 2017 Maybe it's not an engagement ring? He didn't say in his original post that it was. ...I told her we'd get married when I was all done and a working surgeon. I made decent money in fellowship, but now I make north of $400k on my first full time group work that begins sept 1. I can finally begin paying back this massive debt and buy us a home. The last few years as all my training wrapped up I barely made $50k a year and for New York City that's peanuts. We're moving to Los Angeles together for my first job and she said she would like to be engaged before we move. She's stuck by my for 5 years so I'm happy to oblige. I mean yes I can borrow $20k and finance a ring but I figure it's silly when we are finally beginning our lives $500k in debt thanks to costs to become a surgeon. She knows in 5 years upgrading won't be an issue and I told her as much but for now I feel like a very high quality cz is the best option assuming it doesn't look too fake. It sure sounds like it's purpose is to be an engagement ring. That's at odds with his prior posts that he's been married ten years. Link to post Share on other sites
angel.eyes Posted July 25, 2017 Share Posted July 25, 2017 My ring is a diamond but it was only $3000. Why is the choice between 20,000 and cubic zirconia. Does it have to be a big diamond, can't it be a smaller one? Agreed. There are myriad other options besides a huge diamond and a huge rock made to deceive others. Engagement and wedding rings are a promise and a symbol. Indeed in the US, most states treat rings as a contractual obligation, not a gift when things fall apart. The ring goes back to the guy if the woman breaks off the engagement since she isn't fulfilling her part of the contract. Legally, she isn't allowed to keep it as a gift....unlike all the other gifts they exchanged in a relationship. There are real jewelry options at every price point. Choosing a fake instead as an engagement or wedding ring says a lot. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
CautiouslyOptimistic Posted July 25, 2017 Share Posted July 25, 2017 It sure sounds like it's purpose is to be an engagement ring. That's at odds with his prior posts that he's been married ten years. Oh, lol, missed that! *off to get more coffee** 2 Link to post Share on other sites
GunslingerRoland Posted July 25, 2017 Share Posted July 25, 2017 There are lots of places where you can buy a cheaper ring, and then upgrade the diamond later. That might be a better choice, unless she is determined to have a giant rock on her finger. And a giant CZ engagement ring might bring up some awkward conversations, where as no one really thinks much of a small diamond. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
angel.eyes Posted July 25, 2017 Share Posted July 25, 2017 Some people who marry very young have a big wedding anniversary party/rededication ceremony at 10 years and upgrade rings then. 4 Link to post Share on other sites
BettyDraper Posted July 25, 2017 Share Posted July 25, 2017 (edited) Wow geez. She knows and we discussed it, I told her we'd get married when I was all done and a working surgeon. I made decent money in fellowship, but now I make north of $400k on my first full time group work that begins sept 1. I can finally begin paying back this massive debt and buy us a home. The last few years as all my training wrapped up I barely made $50k a year and for New York City that's peanuts. We're moving to Los Angeles together for my first job and she said she would like to be engaged before we move. She's stuck by my for 5 years so I'm happy to oblige. I mean yes I can borrow $20k and finance a ring but I figure it's silly when we are finally beginning our lives $500k in debt thanks to costs to become a surgeon. She knows in 5 years upgrading won't be an issue and I told her as much but for now I feel like a very high quality cz is the best option assuming it doesn't look too fake. If you want a higher quality CZ which is also cost effective, look up Asha Diamonds on their website and you'll see a huge price difference when comparing to diamonds. They are CZ with a diamond bond coating and they look very believable. These stones last an average of 5 years. Moissanites are higher quality than Asha and they are made to last. Choose the Forever One moissy if you want it to look as real as possible. https://ashadiamonds.com/ https://www.moissaniteco.com/ Best of luck! It sounds like you and your fiancee are on your way to a bright financial future since you're already making great financial decisions. Please do NOT take out a loan for a ring when you are already in so much debt, my dear. That would not be smart. Make sure that you have a wedding which is reasonable in terms of cost. Think about having a smaller wedding (50 or under) and getting married outside of NYC. You can also get married during the off season which is November to April or marry on a day which is uncommon for weddings such as Monday to Friday or Sunday. Edited July 25, 2017 by BettyDraper 2 Link to post Share on other sites
BaileyB Posted July 25, 2017 Share Posted July 25, 2017 Since when do diamond engagement rings have to cost $20,000. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
knabe Posted July 25, 2017 Share Posted July 25, 2017 My engagement ring is absolutely gorgeous (to me) and it cost less than 1,000.00. It's white gold with a .6 carat emerald cut stone with a raised, unique setting. It's probably not one of those rich people "high grade perfectly white" diamonds, but it sparkles like crazy, and I get to marry the man that gave it to me! Honestly, I think women who won't get married unless they can have a rock that cost more than a house down payment have their priorities a bit skewed. 7 Link to post Share on other sites
BaileyB Posted July 25, 2017 Share Posted July 25, 2017 Honestly, I think women who won't get married unless they can have a rock that cost more than a house down payment have their priorities a bit skewed. Absolutely! What good is a great big rock if it causes stress and financial hardship for the man I love. Not worth it... 5 Link to post Share on other sites
Davey L Posted July 25, 2017 Share Posted July 25, 2017 Are you planning to inform the recipient that it's a cz? Why don't you wait to get engaged until you can afford a ring? Really, putting the ring as your priority after the house and students loans shows that your woman is low on your priority list. If you can't afford it - don't do it. Or just get a tattoo. I have to disagree with this. Putting a debt repayment and house above a big vulgar show-off ring shows more maturity and commitment to a good future. Running up another pile of debt to get the flash ring would, I hope, be a warning sign and a red flag to a sensible "wife material" woman. Get a nice, tasteful ring at a lower price without an expensive diamond, forget the flashy, showy fake, and work on debts and house purchase instead. If she doesn't like that then that tells you something about her priorities in life. 7 Link to post Share on other sites
No_Go Posted July 25, 2017 Share Posted July 25, 2017 Yeah... If someone with near half million debt went ahead and piled up MORE debt to get me a ring, I'll question his sanity & readiness for serious commitment. With marriage my money become 'our' money and I'd not be comfortable getting in one with someone spending recklessly. CZ is just fine, especially if she knows your circumstances. Piling up mountains of unnecessary debt - not so much. I have to disagree with this. Putting a debt repayment and house above a big vulgar show-off ring shows more maturity and commitment to a good future. Running up another pile of debt to get the flash ring would, I hope, be a warning sign and a red flag to a sensible "wife material" woman. Get a nice, tasteful ring at a lower price without an expensive diamond, forget the flashy, showy fake, and work on debts and house purchase instead. If she doesn't like that then that tells you something about her priorities in life. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
MidwestUSA Posted July 25, 2017 Share Posted July 25, 2017 Since when do diamond engagement rings have to cost $20,000. I settled for a pull tab off of a beer can. It's the thought that counts. 5 Link to post Share on other sites
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