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New relationship: bf flirting with ex


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I been dating a new guy for two months, became official last week. I was hesitant to be official because his roomie is his ex fwb. He reassured me they are platonic. Two days ago, I snooped little on his fb looking for assurance, very wrong I know :/. It seems they are platonic for most part.

However, I found him talking alot to a girl he dated before me. Her sending him sexy pics, him complementing her how shes got the whole package and complaining about me (negatively) that I didn't want commit to him etc. and telling her how he will take her back if shes single again even if he has a gf. Reliving memories of him wanting to impregnate her etc.

 

I confronted him, he said it was before we were official and he thought i would walk not stay with him so he was preparing to move on. I have closed all my doors to my exes and I asked him to do the same so we can focus on our thing. He did last night by msg her that they cant keep talking cuz i see her as a threat, but then he said I forced him do it. I dont know how to feel now, if he thinks i forced him then he will continue doing it or resent me. He asks me I trust him but I have hard time now and unsure how to go about this new relationship.

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Superchicken

All right !.

Let me get my "Guys Tactics and Smoke screens" manuals out...

 

 

Girl, its classic 101 "Covert operations" stuff.

 

 

Don't listen to any bullseeet he spins.

 

 

He has shown no trust, and actually shown his real personality by cheating.. TWICE for petes sake..

He was, and is deceptive in your relationship.

Do NOT give him the benefit of the doubt.

He hasn't earned it.. I mean, has he, in your eyes ?.

 

 

If there was a shred of remorse, or tiny feeling for you from him, he would have made different arrangements, or do more to relieve your mistrust.

 

 

I don't think you are unsure. I think you know what you want to do.

So, do it.

Listen, if he really loves you, then, he will do exactly what you need to put you two back to "One".

 

 

I gave up so many great times with my friends over the years, just to appease my partners.

The same for me was also done, so the relationships blossomed.

 

 

What do YOU want to do, or happen ?.

 

 

That's what I need to read from you.

 

 

Oh, and if he still wants to go.. Then "LET HIM GO", permanently !

 

 

 

 

Ted.

Edited by Superchicken
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The passive aggressive BS -- him telling his EX that he can't be friends with her because you're threatened & won't let him -- would have me telling him that she's welcome to him.

 

 

Even if you & him weren't official, him telling her that she's the whole package & he'd take her back in a heart beat is him telling you that you are his second choice, the consolation prize because he can't have her. Do you really want to be somebody's back up plan?

 

 

If so, stick around until the EX-GF crooks her little finger & he comes running, leaving you in the dust or have enough self respect to get out now.

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Darren Steez

his roomie is his ex fwb. He reassured me they are platonic.

 

Of course it's platonic...but they also bang, hence platonic with benefits, that's how it works

 

him complementing her how shes got the whole package and complaining about me (negatively) that I didn't want commit to him etc. and telling her how he will take her back if shes single again even if he has a gf. Reliving memories of him wanting to impregnate her etc.

 

Hahaha, what?!!? Seriously 5 sins alone in this paragraph, plus he tried to impregnate her? Why aren't you already running?

 

he thought i would walk not stay with him so he was preparing to move on.

 

hey cant keep talking cuz i see her as a threat, but then he said I forced him do it.

 

So he lied to the girl he relived memories of trying to impregnate, saying you forced him to stop talking to her?

 

unsure how to go about this new relationship.

 

After all that and you're still "unsure"?

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