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Well, if it's you not initiating, then YOU'RE the one causing the sex slowdown, sounds like. So it's within your control and that should make you happy.

 

What am am suppose to do???

 

I'm not used to initiating sex...

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What am am suppose to do???

 

I'm not used to initiating sex...

 

Then get used to it. Or prepare for the worst. Everything you're saying here makes me think she's on her way to cheating. Females like confidence. Initiating shows confidence.

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What am am suppose to do???

 

I'm not used to initiating sex...

 

How would you like it if she never initiated? You would probably feel really undesired, right?

 

That's how she feels. Man up. Walk up to her without a word, kiss her hard, tear her clothes off and screw her like it's the only thing that can save your life. Then we'll see if, as a sexually desired and satisfied woman, she ever ignores you around charming guy again.

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How would you like it if she never initiated? You would probably feel really undesired, right?

 

That's how she feels. Man up. Walk up to her without a word, kiss her hard, tear her clothes off and screw her like it's the only thing that can save your life. Then we'll see if, as a sexually desired and satisfied woman, she ever ignores you around charming guy again.

 

I've done that many times, it's a 50/50

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From 2 to 3 times a week, now about once or twice.

 

I get the 'I'm tired' Or 'theres not enough time'

 

Yeah... with responses like this, her telling you to initiate sex is just a BS excuse. She realizes that the sexual decline is affecting you but doesn't want to tell you that she is not that into you anymore, so she is just telling you excuses to get you off her back. Sorry guy, but I think this relationship has run its course. I would just start distancing myself from the situation and leave her to the older married guy - before she gives you the 'I love you, but I'm not in love with you ...' speech.

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What am am suppose to do???

 

I'm not used to initiating sex...

 

Not to be too traditional, but a man who doesn't initiate sex seems very passive and beta. And I HATE the term beta, but it fits in these kinds of situations.

 

If a man never initiated sex with me, I'd assume he didn't want me, and I would definitely shy away from initiating.

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Don't start blaming the guy next door. There are times when relationships just run out of steam, and the attraction depletes. She probably felt this way for awhile and her behavior says I just want to move on now. There isn't anything you can do for the changed feelings. Guy next door? is just her ogling, and getting attention and him doing the same thing. They maybe be thinking it but it doesn't mean they are doing it.

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Friskyone4u
I was hanging out with my GF at her place as usual.

 

Sometimes the neighbors come out and we hang out late at night drinking beers and chatting away.

 

One of her neighbors is a good looking guy and funny and really charismatic.

 

Whenever my GF is talking to him, she starts getting very excited, postures herself different, fixes her hair, and doesn't even look at me. If I try speaking to her, she doesn't hear it.

 

Is this a cause for concern?

 

You just came to a forum of strangers because your gut is telling you something is not right here. TRUST YOUR GUT

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I wish I knew earlier that i was being cheated on,I had to find out through cybernnectic,he helped me get into his device and gave me access to a lot of stuffs I used against him,cybernnectic atgmaildotcom is the address incase you might need some help.I am back to being myself now and happy.

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You just came to a forum of strangers because your gut is telling you something is not right here. TRUST YOUR GUT

 

My gut has been wrong on many occasions! Especially late night snacks

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This is where guys miss the signs and then get confused and think that the break up came out of nowhere.

 

You are only seven months in and she's giving excuses for not wanting sex. Your relationship is on the rocks at best and more likely over.

 

She's pretending you are invisible when the other guy is around because she wants to have sex with him.

 

You made a mistake in telling her because she now thinks you are a wuss because the way to really get over on her is to show her by flirting with girls I front of her and pretending she's invisible. I can tell you that if this were happening she'd probably be throwing a fit.

 

As a man your job is to be the aggressor for sex so you need to be all over the woman you are dating. If not, it could be an issue of low T.

 

My guess is that you aren't that into her and she realizes this and is making plays to increas the sex in her life. She just doesn't want it with you.

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What am am suppose to do???

 

I'm not used to initiating sex...

 

Well, I don't want to be too blunt here, but this is a new bit of information and it's likely also a big part of your problem with the marriage and sex. Most women strongly prefer a man who will initiate. If you're not doing that, I honestly don't know how you got this far. Women like confidence and no hesitation.

 

Now may be too late if sex has dwindled to the point she has given up and there's other tensions, but once things kind of get back to normal with this outside issue, I strongly advise you to initiate not only sex but dates and doing fun things together to try to bring this marriage back to life. Ask her if she wants to go out and plan the date and don't be too serious while out. Have fun and laugh together. Find something fun to do, a light movie or comedy club. Lighten things up. Start being affectionate physically with her at times when you are NOT leading up to sex just so she feels your love and doesn't just think you're just manipulating because you want sex but don't really care.

 

Then if things get cuddly, initiate sex and you be the one who's doing things to her and not waiting for her to get you off. Get her off.

 

You are being way too passive for most women.

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Space Ritual
My gut has been wrong on many occasions! Especially late night snacks

 

Any update?

 

 

You have said multiple times that your now 8 month old relationship has culminated with her telling you that you are the love of her life...

 

By the 8 month mark, she has seen your repertoire. So do not be surprised, as others have said if you soon get the ILYBINILWY speech around Labor Day weekend.

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Beside what everyone has said you should do, what do you her do for fun? I take it your the only one working and paying the bills. Is your life just going outside and hang on the porch and talk to your neighbors Why not go out and have fun instead of doing the boring norm. If she's really into 100% make it stick. Why can you start-up sex what's wrong with you why do you say you don't know how? Come on now really are you serious. Look at the male lion of the jungle get a clue from him. Take charge be a leader. Soft guys don't cut it today you got to be BRAWNY... The type to throw the GF over your shoulder and take her into your tree house of love. Man what's wrong with you.

Edited by coolheadal
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