Author Riot21 Posted September 25, 2017 Author Share Posted September 25, 2017 He didn't know that guy was my ex and never met him. My ex asked to play when my date was playing and I ignored him and he then walked away. Highly doubt he saw anything. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Riot21 Posted September 25, 2017 Author Share Posted September 25, 2017 And he said he had a great time that night me would love to meet this week if our schedule allows Link to post Share on other sites
d0nnivain Posted September 25, 2017 Share Posted September 25, 2017 Then do what dumbass suggested & focus on the new guy. You asked what you should do. That is what you should do: Forget about your EX & stay away from him. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Riot21 Posted November 4, 2017 Author Share Posted November 4, 2017 So the new guy I was seeing ended up being a huge douchebag. My ex currently is seeing another woman. Claims she is boring and depressed but he likes her because she thinks he is the greatest person in the world. He says he wants to get back together with me but is super stressed with losing a lease and a huge financial loss. He says he is waiting for a week to break things off with her. I don't know what to believe. He texts her still and asked her to his Halloween party but said it's because I went to a guy who I was seeing' Halloween party. I don't understand why he is doing this to me. All I want is to make things work and to be happy but it's so hard to feel good about myself when I constantly am the side chick when I was the main woman for six years. He says he isn't wrong for not telling me earlier he was seeing someone else and that no one should be mad at him for hanging out and having sex with both of us without telling either of us. Link to post Share on other sites
Blanco Posted November 4, 2017 Share Posted November 4, 2017 How many more times are you going to go through this? Are you not concerned of wasting even more time on someone who had proven to be a poor bet for a quality relationship? 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author Riot21 Posted November 4, 2017 Author Share Posted November 4, 2017 How many more times are you going to go through this? Are you not concerned of wasting even more time on someone who had proven to be a poor bet for a quality relationship? Is he just a ****ty person? Or does he just hate me? Link to post Share on other sites
BaileyB Posted November 4, 2017 Share Posted November 4, 2017 I wouldn't touch this guy with a 10 foot pole... Why would you ever give this guy the time of day? Remember, he is your ex for a reason... Link to post Share on other sites
Author Riot21 Posted November 4, 2017 Author Share Posted November 4, 2017 I wouldn't touch this guy with a 10 foot pole... Why would you ever give this guy the time of day? Remember, he is your ex for a reason... Is it wrong that he used me and this other girl? He is so afraid of me telling this other girl he and I have been having Sex for months and he says you're hurting me if you tell her... he thinks it's perfectly okay for him to have sex with two people at once and refuses to take any blame for his actions. Link to post Share on other sites
BaileyB Posted November 4, 2017 Share Posted November 4, 2017 (edited) Well, I would not be having sex with anyone who is having sex with another person. Not ever going to happen. Brutal honesty coming up... be prepared. This guy is a total jerk. First, for cheating on his girlfriend by having sex with you - FOR MONTHS. And then, for trying to guilt you into not telling this other girl - "you are hurting me if you tell." He's not stupid - he has a good thing going here and he wants to keep it going... so, he thinks that if he makes you feel bad about "hurting him" that you will not tell the other girl and his party will continue. First thing I would do - I would hurt him alright, with a knee to the groin (metaphorically speaking). He would be gone from my life faster than he even knew what was happening. The next thing I would do - tell the other girl that her boyfriend is a lying, cheating, idiot. As for you, my dear... well, the question you need to be asking yourself is why you are having sex with another woman's boyfriend? How would you like it if another woman did this to you? And, why do you value yourself so little that you would agree to sleep with a man - FOR MONTHS - who is a lying, cheating, excuse of a human being... I would argue that he hasn't "used you" as much as you have agreed to be a willing accomplish to his cheating behaviors. When you are looking for someone to blame or hold accountable, don't be looking at this man - look right in the mirror at yourself. No man can ever "use" you without your consent. Edited November 4, 2017 by BaileyB 1 Link to post Share on other sites
BaileyB Posted November 4, 2017 Share Posted November 4, 2017 One other point to ponder... even if he did leave this other girl tomorrow - do you really want to date a man who would lie and cheat on his girlfriend, and shows no remorse for lying and cheating on his girlfriend? Darling girl, you are special. But, this relationship is not special. It is not "meant to be" while this other girl is miserable, depressed, and unhappy... at the end of the day, he is just a guy looking for sex anywhere he can get it. And, he's proven that he's willing to do just about anything to get it. There is nothing special or wonderful about that. Have some self respect and tell this guy to take a hike - and not to come back even if/when he is single. He is no catch! Link to post Share on other sites
alterest Posted November 4, 2017 Share Posted November 4, 2017 Look, I do belive that getting back together with an ex could work, but I don't think that your case. He is in another relationship and keep making promises to you as his currently relationship is nothing. He doesn't respect you doing that, he doesn't respect his girlfriend, he doesn't respect himself. He seems pretty imature and need to grow up before get into a new relationship. I think you will only hurt yourself backing together with him. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
SpecialJ Posted November 4, 2017 Share Posted November 4, 2017 He'd still be using you. From your first post in this thread, he's basically admitted he's only with the new girl because of how she makes him feel, not because he cares about her and is a good partner to her... and he's admitted that he's more concerned about his own problems than anyone or anything else right now, and still wants a woman around to make him feel good and support him during that. He's bored of the new one, so may as well substitute you in. Aren't you worth more than that? Link to post Share on other sites
SpecialJ Posted November 4, 2017 Share Posted November 4, 2017 (Plus -- maybe the new girl is in part depressed because he's mistreating her and has drained her of her self-worth? Do you need him doing that to you, too?) 1 Link to post Share on other sites
BaileyB Posted November 4, 2017 Share Posted November 4, 2017 (Plus -- maybe the new girl is in part depressed because he's mistreating her and has drained her of her self-worth? Do you need him doing that to you, too?) Maybe the new girl is depressed because she knows that he has a wandering eye... and can't keep it in his pants? It's possible. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Riot21 Posted November 5, 2017 Author Share Posted November 5, 2017 He says they're just friends with benefits so he's not bad at all for doing any of this. He wants to make things work with me but has put in no effort to make things work. I get upset that he's puttin in no effort and try to block him out of my life and he gets upset when I block him on social media. Then I unblock him because I feel bad and a cycle is created. He said he only liked this girl physically and not in any other way. Link to post Share on other sites
BaileyB Posted November 5, 2017 Share Posted November 5, 2017 He says they're just friends with benefits so he's not bad at all for doing any of this. He wants to make things work with me but has put in no effort to make things work. I get upset that he's puttin in no effort and try to block him out of my life and he gets upset when I block him on social media. Then I unblock him because I feel bad and a cycle is created. He said he only liked this girl physically and not in any other way. Do what you want, but do you really want to "date" a man who is banging another girl. I mean, can we not raise the bar a little higher than that... Is there really nobody else you can date... Link to post Share on other sites
Author Riot21 Posted November 5, 2017 Author Share Posted November 5, 2017 Most guys I've dated I can tell they just wanna have sex and we don't laugh or have fun like my ex and I do. It sucks. I don't care about sex. I care about more meaningful things with someone and most people don't seem to give a ****. Link to post Share on other sites
BaileyB Posted November 5, 2017 Share Posted November 5, 2017 Most guys I've dated I can tell they just wanna have sex and we don't laugh or have fun like my ex and I do. It sucks. I don't care about sex. I care about more meaningful things with someone and most people don't seem to give a ****. As hard as it may be to believe, it is actually possible to meet a guy with whom you can laugh and have fun, and he will have enough respect for you not to have sex with another woman. I would respectfully suggest that you should keep looking... You are young. Hang in there, someday you will meet someone who has the maturity to share a real relationship and then you will know the difference. You will look back and wonder, what in the world were you doing when you were younger. Until then, don't settle for this... You are worth so much more than this. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Riot21 Posted November 5, 2017 Author Share Posted November 5, 2017 He's mad that I contacted her and told her that he and I were having sex and hanging out often during the time they were seeing each other. He says I'm vindictive and hateful towards him for being in his business. I told him he was dishonest with both of us and it's not fair for anyone involved. But now I am the bad person? What gives? Link to post Share on other sites
BaileyB Posted November 5, 2017 Share Posted November 5, 2017 (edited) He's mad that I contacted her and told her that he and I were having sex and hanging out often during the time they were seeing each other. He says I'm vindictive and hateful towards him for being in his business. I told him he was dishonest with both of us and it's not fair for anyone involved. But now I am the bad person? What gives? No, you are not a bad person. What does he expect - he's having sex with two women and thinking that neither one of you is going to tell the other? There are consequences for his actions. He's just unhappy because the fun is over for him... He needs someone to blame, because he's certainly not going to take responsibility... Edited November 5, 2017 by BaileyB 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author Riot21 Posted November 5, 2017 Author Share Posted November 5, 2017 I'm not crazy or terrible for wanting to tell her, right? I would want to know if someone who I was having sex with regularly and had feelings for was having Sex with someone else. He said I just did it to hurt her and him Do people like him change? I just am baffled at how he can tell me he loves me. Wants to have a family with me. Make things work between us. But then continues to see someone else. I just want him to hurt so bad and feel the pain he caused me for a year and I don't know how to do it. I really don't think he is capable of empathy. Link to post Share on other sites
BaileyB Posted November 5, 2017 Share Posted November 5, 2017 I'm not crazy or terrible for wanting to tell her, right? I would want to know if someone who I was having sex with regularly and had feelings for was having Sex with someone else. He said I just did it to hurt her and him Do people like him change? I just am baffled at how he can tell me he loves me. Wants to have a family with me. Make things work between us. But then continues to see someone else. I just want him to hurt so bad and feel the pain he caused me for a year and I don't know how to do it. I really don't think he is capable of empathy. No, I don't think you are terrible. If I was dating someone, I would want to know if he was sleeping with someone else. He is clearly unhappy because he had a good thing going, and you've spoiled it for him. Lack of empathy - I don't know... Selfish, immature, manipulative... For sure. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Riot21 Posted November 12, 2017 Author Share Posted November 12, 2017 My ex and I have been broken up for nearly a year. Yesterday I found out that he broke into my apartment and went through my computer. He found texts from 2015 that pissed him off and said he ****ing hated me and I was the most rotten terrible person in the world. This is all after I told him that I was losing feelings of intimacy for him and really was finding myself to be happier as simply his friend instead of longing for him to make things work. This is strange because he said he has been seeing another girl for four months and initially told me that she was lazy, unmotivated, and unintelligent. After he read my texts he is telling me that he really likes her. That she is motivated, beautiful, has a great ass a big boobs, and that he really wants things to work with her. I asked him if he saw himself loving her and he said yes, I can now that I am opening myself up to the possibility of loving someone else. What the hell is he thinking?! Is he trying to manipulate me? TD;LR ex broke into my apartment when I wasn't there with a key I gave him months prior, read my texts, now says he hates me for messages I sent in 2015 and that he really wants to make things work now with another girl he has been seeing. What should I think of this? Link to post Share on other sites
CautiouslyOptimistic Posted November 12, 2017 Share Posted November 12, 2017 What should I think of this? That you want to file a police report. 4 Link to post Share on other sites
staggerlee71 Posted November 12, 2017 Share Posted November 12, 2017 the real question is... what do YOU think of this? Link to post Share on other sites
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